blinkbling24

[Fan Fic] There will always be Seishun Amigo

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 06:57:15 GMT

Title: There will always be Seishun Amigo
Author: blinkbling24
Pairing: Akame, Kamepi
Genre: I'm not sure actually.....Romance? Friendship?
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.
Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the accidental grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.
Summary: Shuji and Akira
A/N: JE is torturing me with plot bunnies bouncing around distractedly in front of me. Once again inspired by the Best Artist 2009 telecast. This is more Kamepi than Akame but there's still Akame in it, so it qualifies I guess. It's a short one, because I just had to bang it out before it disturbs the hell out of me. It's a little bit of a warped concept, and might be a little immoral and strange, but...ah well...Tell me what you think.
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It was iron-clad, even though it was unwritten. Even Akanishi Jin respected it.

If they were to be asked how exactly did it happen, and it would probably be met with lots of deep thinking, roundabout attempts, but never a definite answer. More than because they did not want to answer, it was because they themselves did not exactly know.

Maybe it was because Kame was just so fucking thin, and not eating that Yamapi just wanted to fatten him up using any way possible, even if it meant passing food messily from mouth to mouth during lunch breaks on the Nobuta set. Maybe it was because of the grueling after hours to get that high kick perfected at just the right angle where Kame thought that Yamapi looked so sexy all hot and sweaty. Maybe it was how Kame flirted unabashedly with the cameras during the PV recording, in a way that Yamapi never really believed when Jin told him, that made it suddenly tight in his white pants that concealed nothing. Maybe it was because Yamapi had a friendly smile for him during the tumultuous time when KAT-TUN had passive-aggressively hated Kame for debuting without them.

Whatever it was, every time the song played, every time they performed it, they would be hit with a profound heat wave of need that made them seek each other.

The first time it happened, it was after recording the single. It was late at night in the studios, and they were both tired, not used to the new filming schedule which had to accommodate Horikita Maki’s school schedule. It brought a whole new meaning to life revolving around a girl, as Yamapi had remarked during production meetings, earning himself a kick under the table from Kame who observed Maki-chan’s face turning bright tomato red at those words.

The studios were dark as the sound crew had already left. Yamapi was just about to leave when he spied Kame crouched in a corner, fast asleep, between the cushioned walls of the room. He squatted in front of Kame and saw that Kame still had the giant headphones on. Soft sounds emitted from them to let Yamapi know that it was the final mix of the song. He hummed along to the melody, unaware that he was stroking Kame’s thin cheeks. Unaware until Kame jolted awake, staring at Yamapi with eyes that illuminated softly in the dim room.

It happened very quickly, soft lips against soft lips, hands touching everywhere, and then Kame was arching beautifully on the studio floor as Yamapi plunged deeper and deeper, following the rhythm of the song that was streaming out of the headphones, tossed aside, forgotten.

After that, it just kept happening, in between takes of the PV recording when the crew was setting up for new camera angles, backstage during the promotion runs, like an aphrodisiac which caused both of them to end up panting against each other, grinding and moving to the familiar tune in their heads.

It was an escape. During their trysts, they were never Yamashita Tomohisa, the leader of NEWS, or Kamenashi Kazuya, the responsible one in KAT-TUN. They were never the Yamapi and Kame who hardly spoke to each other beyond the friendly greetings when they passed each other in the jimusho. They were never the two fighting for Jin’s affections. Instead, they were Shuji and Akira, two ordinary boys seeking an ordinary life, just for that short moment, and it was all it took.

It was Kame that brought it up, after performing their last performance for a while. They had been trying to restrain themselves, promising to hold back, even as they held each other, all sweaty and sticky on the couch in the dressing room during the previous time. Even in their young minds, they knew that it was a reasonable thing to stop what they were doing. But, once the first chords of the latin guitar struck and as they sang, turning and looking into each other’s eyes, they could not deny it. Hands tugging each others’ collars, lips pressed feverishly together, in the cramped stall of the secluded fourth floor male toilet. It was then, after they had calmed down, that they made a new pact. That Shuji and Akira would be buried deep in the recesses of their minds until they were singing Seishun Amigo again. That was when they could be Shuji and Akira once more.

Along the way, Yamashita Tomohisa and Kamenashi Kazuya drifted further apart. They shared a common denominator – Akanishi Jin – Yamapi’s best friend, and Kame’s lover, but while Yamapi’s friendship with Jin was a steady one, Kame’s relationship with Jin was stormy.

Even then, whenever Kame, or Yamapi, performed Seishun Amigo, even alone on stage, the other’s doorbell would ring soon after, and it was Shuji looking for Akira, or Akira looking for Shuji.

When Jin left, Kame was devastated, and it was Akira that brought comfort. It felt good to just be plain old Shuji, in the arms of his uncomplicated, steadfast friend, for that little while.

Yamapi never told anyone, even those that he was seriously dating, about this pact. But, when Jin returned to claim Kame back, Kame chose to tell Jin. Jin was important to him and he wanted Jin to know of everything else that was important in his life. After a few punches thrown at Yamapi who took it like a man, Jin understood, with one condition, that it was always to be Shuji running to Akira, and not Kame running to Yamapi, and it was agreed.

Since then, Shuji and Akira did not meet very often. Once a year, if they were lucky. Yamapi and Kame came to accept that maybe Shuji's and Akira’s friendship was at its end.

But, at 24 hours TV this year, they were together again. Yamapi was stricken with the new flu, and it was Shuji who tucked Akira to bed after a long night. It was Shuji who stayed, pressing a cold towel on Akira’s forehead. It was Shuji whom Akira fell asleep hugging.

Tonight, once again, Seishun Amigo made a revival. On the stage, where bright lights shone, when the bass notes of the song pulsated through their veins, and they turned to each other, eyes blazed with an understanding, a desire. The tension between Yamashita and Kamenashi melted away into the friendship that was Shuji and Akira.

After the show, Kame looked at Jin, who nodded, and said it was ok for him to go but to come back soon, and it was Shuji that leaned on Akira’s car, waiting to be whisked away, to fufill the pact that was made once upon a time by Seishun Amigos.

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 15

Wed, 16 Dec 2009 09:09:52 GMT

“Give me a reason why I shouldn’t be,” Kame said as he did his twirl half-heartedly. It was rehearsal after all, he did not need to put in the effort. He had to conserve whatever effort he had left in him.

“Kame…..” Yamapi began.

“What Pi? What?” Kame eyes trembled with controlled fury as he stopped and faced Jin’s best friend.

Yamapi stayed silent, aware that Kame needed to rant.

Kame glared, but continued, “It’s like no one has faith in KAT-TUN anymore, even though we’ve proved them wrong with Bokura no Machi de. We topped the charts, and we topped it without him. And yet, there’s still no faith. I have to do this act with you, like as though my own popularity, like the rest of the members’ popularity, is not enough to hold things together, I need to tap on yours.”

“I don’t think anyone thinks that,” Yamapi tried.

“Oh? So, are you telling me that this is not a preservation-of-investment move by the company? They’ve lost their prized commodity, and I alone don’t seem to be enough to reassure them.”

There was no comeback, Yamapi knew as well as Kame how the industry worked.

“I just have to work harder, and make sure I don’t fail, make sure KAT-TUN doesn’t fail,” Kame gestured Pi to get into position again.

Sighing, Pi stepped up and went through the dance moves mechanically once more.

“I think that should do it,” Kame wiped his face with the towel that draped around his neck.

“Erm…Kame?” Pi wondered if he should say what he wanted to.

“Yeah?” Kame responded with his face still in the towel.

“He called.” Yamapi bit the bullet.

“That concerns me how?” Kame, lowering the towel, said flatly.

“He asked about you.”

“The very fact that he called you, not me, shows that it was just a question of formality.”

“Kame…..”

“Enough Pi, I need to go back to KAT-TUN now. I don’t abandon people, unlike a person we know.”

Ouch.

“Oh, and Pi, if he calls you again, tell him that we don’t need him, that I don’t need him. I can do this on my own. I will do this on my own. I do not need Akanishi Jin.”

***

May 2008, Don’t You Ever Stop promotion runs

Everywhere they went, from Music Station to Utaban to Shounen Club Premium, Jin simply stared at Kame, wondering, wondering, but always failing to come up with an answer. He watched as Kame chattered animatedly with the hosts, he watched as Kame spoke words of encourage to the Juniors. He watched as Kame engaged in frivolous banter with the rest of the members in the dressing rooms, and most of all, he watched Kame’s interaction with Koki.

Nothing has changed, but what was he expecting? After that stunt he pulled almost a month ago, Jin hardly expected Kame to be speaking to him. But speaking to him Kame was, as though nothing had happened, as though he had dirty, forbidden sex with someone else, someone that looked like Kamenashi Kazuya, but wasn’t.

“You have to leave now.”

“Kazuya….I…..”

“Leave. Koki will be back any minute.”

“But…”

“Jin, listen to me. Just leave. We’ll deal with this later.”

There was gentleness in Kame’s voice then, there was even a goodbye kiss, and Jin harboured hope that maybe, just maybe Kame would make things right, would set things right, and finally be his. However, as the days passed, that hope got smaller and smaller, until it had almost all but faded away.

“Jin. JIN!”

“Huh?” Jin looked up from where he was sitting alone in the dressing room. The others were cruising the corridors, saying hi to the other guests on Music Station that day.

“Standby in 15,” Kame said as he sat beside Jin in front of the long make-up mirror and patted on some matt foundation. Jin simply nodded and watched Kame through the mirror. He opened his mouth to say something, but shut it again, not even knowing where to begin.

“I like your new solo,” Kame said suddenly even as he examined his complexion in the brightly lit mirror, almost startling Jin out of his chair.

“Oh really?” Jin managed.

Kame nodded, “Yeah, although I don’t understand more than half the lyrics, I like it. Maybe you can explain the lyrics to me sometime, ne?” Kame winked through the mirror, sending Jin reeling. Was Kame flirting with him? What did it mean?

“Kame….” Jin began.

“Not now,” Kame interrupted, knowing exactly where Jin was headed.

“Then when?” Jin finally mustered up the strength to look Kame in the eye.

“Soon,” Kame replied dismissively, but held Jin’s gaze. Jin never felt more muddled than he did that very moment.

“Kame-chan!” Koki burst into the room, forcing Kame and Jin to break eye contact. Jin turned away as Koki enveloped Kame in a hug from the back. He did not want to see Koki kissing Kame’s hair, he did not want to see the sweet smile that graced Kame’s face at the simple act of affection. He did not want to see any of it at all.

***

If doctors where to hook up an EKG machine to him right that very moment, Kame was sure he would immediately be admitted to hospital and be the subject of numerous tests. No normal human being had the erratic heartbeat that he had at the moment. Sometimes he felt so suffocated that he was sure his heart had stopped, other times, his heart would beat so fast and so hard that he would feel like he was having a seizure. All this because of one Akanishi Jin.

As they all gathered backstage in preparation to go down the stairs when they hear their band name being called on Music Station, Kame tried to focus his energy on the lines he had to say, and the performance they had to nail in front of the cameras, and not how much he hated the situation that he had a hand in putting himself in.

Kame knew that Jin was feeling like he was thrown in a loop. Kame felt no better, except that Kame was a better actor than Jin was. Kame was well aware that Jin was expecting something from him, regardless of what the something was. But the stubborn refusal to acknowledge that Jin had any profound effect on him presented itself stronger than simply owing Jin an answer. Kame had long decided that he did not need Jin, and this feeling of, of….Kame did not even know how to name it, but he knew that it would not do, it would not do at all.

But the sex. Kame could not get over it. That one time, that one forbidden time with Jin, ignited a fire so hot that far surpassed anything that he experienced with Koki. It was addictive, and every time he made love to Koki after that incident, he could not help comparing, and sex with Koki always fell short. Koki’s touches, gentle and warm, were lackluster compared to Jin’s searing hands that scalded his body everywhere he touched. Kame found himself resenting Koki, and once he identified that feeling, he was immediately hit with extreme guilt, which manifested in wanting to make Koki feel loved and happy. It was vicious cycle, and Kame was starting to get very dizzy and sick because of it.

And yet, he found himself upping his professional façade, for KAT-TUN’s sake, for Koki’s sake, and most of all, for his own sake. He was trying his utmost best to reconcile issues within himself, meanwhile putting up a shield in front of Jin. His recent friendliness towards Jin was disconcerting, even to himself but it was the only way he knew how to act in front of Jin now without revealing anything that would show weakness. However, his reluctance to resolve the issue with Jin had another name altogether. Once upon a time, Jin had the upper hand in their relationship, but now, the tables have turned, and Kame was in power now. It was scarily satisfying, and Kame was afraid that it would consume him. He had to resist, he had to.

He reached for Koki’s hand as the introduction to Music Station played and Tomori-san walked past them to take his place in front of the cameras. He felt Koki’s thumb massage his palm, and his heartbeat returned to normal. Kame turned to look at Koki, summoning all the feelings he had for Koki into his eyes, completely aware that another pair of eyes was on them, eyes that were glazed with a darkness that was irresistible.

***

July 2008, Sendai City, the Queen of Pirates summer concert tour

“Pi, talk to me before I go crazy,” Jin, out of desperation from the Shinkansen ride from Tokyo to Sendai, had called his best friend. He had just about enough. The entire month that just passed was full of concert preparations, full of concert performances, full of senseless, friendly words from Kame that was akin to a vacuum of silence where Jin was concerned, full of Kame’s loaded looks that Jin for the life of him could not decipher, and full of the usual brotherly chumminess from Koki that made Jin feel like the worst bastard on the face of the earth. Those, and Kame’s and Koki’s public displays of affection, which was now being exhibited as they alighted the bullet train onto the Sendai platform, with Koki’s arm slung territorially around Kame’s shoulder, and Kame whispering sweet nothings into Koki’s ear before they both giggle conspiratorially. Jin felt like he was going mad.

“What? Where are you?”

“In Sendai. We’re having our concert here tomorrow.”

“And why are you going crazy?” Yamapi was sometimes too astute for his own good, Jin thought. Jin had not told Yamapi about what had happened between him and Kame. Yamapi had already warned him enough about the consequences, and Jin really did not want to hear any more nagging. Besides, he could not even explain it to himself, what more to Yamapi.

“Oh, errr…it’s nothing. Just doing this whole concert thing with the guys is reminding me why I had to escape to LA back then.”

“Jin? You’re not planning on doing anything stupid again are you?” Jin heard the tinge of worry in Yamapi’s voice.

“No, of course not. I just need your calming influence, that’s all,” Jin said, wondering who was supposed to pacify who now.

“Good, cos I really hate being your nanny, you know that right?”

Jin did not say a thing for a good minute. He unwittingly turned his head and witnessed a kiss between Kame and Koki. He shuddered and wanted to run far far away.

“Jin? Jin? You there?”

“Yeah…I’m here. Yes yes, you’re not my nanny.”

“Get that into your thick skull,” Yamapi’s laughter rang in his ear, and Jin felt a little lighter. He laughed along as he followed the rest of the guys out of the station.

“Err..Pi?”

“Yeah?”

“I gotta call you back. The sadistic director is standing in front of us for some reason.”

“Oh shit.”

“Oh shit is right. Have a good one.”

“You too, and Jin?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t do anything stupid.” Jin snapped his phone shut. Why does Yamapi always thick the worst of him, Jin thought as he channeled his attention to the ruckus in front of him. It looked like it was going to be another long day.

***

“He’s not going to jump. I can bet you all the money in my bank account and in my investment portfolios that he’s not going to jump.”

“I’m not going to bet with you over a pure fact. It’s not financially wise. There’s no chance in hell he will jump,” Jin chuckled as he exhaled smoke from his cigarette, watching Koki do the same. They were on a smoke break, their third in the duration of the time they were at the amusement park, while the cameras focused on Taguchi and Ueda embarking on the fruitless attempt of encouraging Maru. Koki laughed in response.

“Wait a minute, you have investment portfolios?” Jin asked, surprised.

“Yeah, my mum made me get them, when I first started out. Something about saving for the future, wife and kids and all that stuff.”

Jin stiffened a little. Wife and kids?

“Oh yeah?” Jin tried to sound casual even as he gave Koki a sincere smirk.

“Who would have thought my life would take a different direction huh? Falling for Kame and all,” Koki gave Jin a manly pat on the shoulder to hide his embarrassment for exposing such a raw emotion.

“You’re one lucky fella,” Jin meant it.

“I am, aren’t I?”

Jin took a long drag of his cigarette. This easy friendship between him and Koki was something he felt uneasy about. It would make things so much less complicated if he hated Koki, but he did not. The reality was that he liked Koki very much, and it was killing him.

“We’re going to have to go up there eventually you know, for good TV and member love sort of shit,” Koki said as he flicked his cigarette stub on the ground and stepped on it.

Member love. How ironic, Jin thought, as he looked up after stubbing out his own stick. To the audience of Cartoon KAT-TUN, he was looking on in amusement, mixed with a little bit of annoyance, at Nakamaru, but in actual fact, he was looking at someone else entirely. Jin sighed as he watched Koki take the first steps towards the tower and figured he should follow. Did he really have to?

They were right. Wimpy Maru chickened out.

“Get Kamenashi-kun to do it,” one of the production staff egged Jin and Jin did what he was told, feeling slightly numb at the mention of Kame’s name.

“My Kame can do anything,” Koki remarked with pride in his voice before projecting it further to call out to Kame as well. Jin felt constipated and nauseated at the same time. Jin went through the motions of good television, participating, and counting down, all the while feeling sick at the sight of Kame perched at the edge of the platform. Beautiful was all Jin could think as Kame launched himself gracefully off the platform. The adoration in Jin’s eyes was genuine. His Kazuya can do anything, he thought.

***

“Jin? Are you in there? Oh.”

Kame had to swallow to regain his coherency when Jin opened the door of his hotel room, hair wet and dressed only in a rather flimsy towel tied around his waist.

“Kame,” Surprised, Jin stepped aside to allow Kame to come in. “What are you doing here?”

Clearing his throat, Kame walked towards the windows. He looked out at the night sky for a while, knowing that if he looked anywhere else, he would start to unravel. He heard shuffling in the background. He listened to it for a couple of minutes before turning to catch Jin pulling the last of his clothing, a t-shirt, through his arm. It was only then that Kame felt safe enough to speak.

“I need your help. Downstairs. At the bar.”

“Oh, so that’s where my roomie went.”

“Yeah. He was still shaken from the bungee attempt and wanted some alcohol to calm his nerves.”

“Can’t you manage by yourself? I’m kinda tired,” Jin had wanted to fake a yawn, but it came out real.

“Koki’s with him. I can’t manage them both. Ueda shot me a death glare when I bothered him in the gym, and Taguchi is not opening the hotel room door. I suspect he’s sitting on the toilet with his PSP.” Kame chuckled slightly at the image, “so you’ll have to do.”

“Right. Sure.”

After about half an hour of negotiating with drunkards, which was always not a good idea and resulted in Jin and Kame drinking 4 shots of tequila each, they managed to heave 2 heavy, uncooperative bodies back into Jin’s room, it was nearest the elevators after all. Jin sat on the bed and dropped Nakamaru, whom he was piggy-backing, roughly down. Maru did not even stir. He was out cold.

Jin rushed over to help Kame, who was not having a very easy time with drunk Koki. Koki was clinging and Kame was feeling the strain. Jin took over, prying Koki away from Kame, and flopped him on the other bed closer to the door, where Koki groaned, holding his head.

Watching Kame catch his breath, Jin whispered, “Let me know when you’re ready to bring him to your room.”

Kame smiled endearingly at Koki who had curled up in the foetal position and was muttering nonsense to no one in particular.

“Nah, let him stay here. He’s clingy and horny when drunk and I really want my sleep tonight. He’ll fall asleep soon enough, when he realizes he’s alone in bed.”

Too much information, Jin really did not have to know that.

“All well and good Kame, but Koki’s on my bed.”

“We have no choice do we? You’ll just have to spend the night with me in my room.”

What?

***

Against his better judgement, Jin followed Kame across the hall to his room. His eyes widened when he realized that Kame’s room was decorated differently from the one he just left. For one thing, instead of 2 twin beds, in their place, was a double bed. Maybe it was not that shocking, Kame and Koki were a couple after all, what was shocking was the fact that Kame suggested that he bunk in with him.

What did this all mean? The alcohol in Jin’s system was clouding his senses a little, even though he was sober enough to hear the alarm bells in his head.

Maybe it was the alcohol talking. Kame had no idea how he could have been so bold to have suggested what he did. But it felt good to let go of all the trepidation he had been carrying for the past month, even for a little while. He climbed onto his side of the bed and looked expectantly at Jin. It had been a long time since they shared a room together during work, ever since….ever since, before LA. And now, there Jin was, standing in a corner, looking like sex itself.

Suddenly, as though something clicked into place, Kame’s emotions turned. He remembered the pain of abandonment. He remembered how much he struggled to climb to the top. He remembered how Jin, Jin who left him, came back, and suddenly success and popularity was not his alone to take. He watched as Jin weighed his sleeping options before him, in obvious awkwardness and turmoil, and there and then, Kame had the answer he had been searching for these past couple of weeks.

Unlike 2 years ago, where he was a love sick puppy that needed Jin oxygen to survive, he was now well aware that he did not need Jin.

But he wanted Jin.

He wanted to turn Jin’s life upside down and inside out, just as what Jin had done to him. He wanted Jin to surrender himself to him, to bare all, to fall hopelessly, so that Kame could strip him of everything, until everyone saw the imperfect Jin that broke his heart when he left. Kame wanted the power, he wanted the control. It was all he was now, Jin had made him that way.

“Err…I think I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“Don’t be silly. You’ll throw your back out. I can’t have an unsuccessful concert because I let you sleep on the couch.”

Of course, it was always about work. Jin frowned.

“C’mere,” Kame patted the empty space on the bed beside him.

Jin walked up to the bed, still reluctant, even though his body seemed to have a mind of its own. Kame reached out, and Jin allowed himself to be led under the covers. Once tucked in, Jin tried resisting again by inching himself as close to the edge of the bed as possible. He did not want a repeat of that night. He knew now that it was a huge mistake, and he was thankful that Koki did not find out, that Kame had been decent enough to not talk about it.

But all resistance went out the window when Kame cuddled up and placed a hand on his groin. Jin groaned as Kame’s deft fingers made quick work of his jeans’ button and zipper, worming their way through the slit of Jin’s boxers to coax an erection out of him.

“Kame…” Jin panted, turning to catch lust dancing in Kame’s eyes, “What…are…you…ah…doing?”

“I want you,” Kame said softly but surely into his ear even as he replaced his gentle caressing with a hand wrapped firmly around his cock, pumping, pumping, “Isn’t that the answer you wanted to hear?” Kame growled sensually and bit gently down on his earlobe.

Every single strand of hair on his body stood on ends as Jin arched his body in reaction to Kame’s actions.

“Kazuya…..earrghh…..Kazuya…..”

“Say it again, my name, say it again,” Kame leaned in for an intense kiss, refusing to think about the meaning of the warm shiver caused by Jin’s voice calling his name.

“Kazuya,” Jin whispered against his lips, hands searching out for Kame, taking hold of his arms, stroking them gently up and down, and Kame let himself get lost, lost in those arms, that scent, that voice that said his name, lost in every bit of Akanishi Jin.

[Fan Fic] Sight

Wed, 16 Dec 2009 02:16:00 GMT

Title: Sight
Author: blinkbling24
Pairing: Akame, Pin (friendship), Kamepi (unrequited)
Genre: Angst, Romance
Rating: R (slight language, and kissing)
Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.
Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the accidental grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.
Summary: Insecurity. Hurt. Friendship. Love.
A/N: Yesterday's Best Artist 2009 telecast is a fic begging to be written, what with Yamapi and Kame being less than friendly (I wonder why), and SPEED coming up right after KAT-TUN's performance (read: Uehara Takako and Jin). I couldn't resist.
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She’s here.

In this very arena.

Under the same roof.

Under the same roof as him.

There is no way they can avoid each other.

It is not as though the performance line-up puts them far apart, enough apart that they can leave without seeing her.

God is never so kind.

Her group’s performance is right after theirs.

Why did Johnny Kitagawa allow this?

After years of deliberately pulling them apart, of causing hurt and tears, he now permits them to be near each other once more?

Where is the logic in that?

Cruel. So very cruel.

***

“Pi, can I talk to you?”

The NEWS dressing room was empty except for one member.

Where the other members were is inconsequential.

“I’ve learnt the hard way that talking to you is not a good idea, Kamenashi, or have you forgotten?”

Kame remembers, but presses on.

“She’s here.”

“I know.”

The silence speaks for both of them.

“I’m scared.”

“He’s with you now.”

“He dreams about her, he calls out her name in his sleep sometimes. He doesn’t know. But I do.”

Yamapi looks at Kame, really looks, and sees fear behind dry, dark, beautiful eyes.

He takes Kame by the collar and pushes him until his back meets a wall.

“Goddammit. He’s with you now.”

“Pi…”

“You’re with him now.”

Lips crush down, licking, tasting unresponsive ones.

Kame just stands there, lets him, but just stands there.

Cold. Distant. Not his.

“Let me go.”

Double meaning. Yamapi gets it. His lips burn, painful. So very painful.

“I can’t talk to you anymore, Kamenashi, not now.”

Maybe someday, when the wound heals, when only a scar remains.

“But you talk to him.”

“I do.”

“Please.”

Yamapi nods, but he cannot bring himself to smile.

“Trust him.”

Kame leaves.

***

Jin’s looking at the line-up.

Kame watches.

Jin’s eyes widen.

Kame watches.

Jin paces the dressing room, fidgets as he gets his hair and make-up done, walks to the door, pauses, and walks back, many times.

Kame watches.

Jin’s hand is on the door knob, he turns it.

“Jin?”

“Yes sweetheart?”

“Where are you going?”

“Nowhere, just…”

Jin is out the door, and Kame’s heart. His heart.

***

“Jin. Hold up.”

“What is it Pi?”

“You’re sure this is a good idea? Going to her?”

“I don’t know. But…”

“You’re his now.”

“And he’s mine.”

“You love him.”

“I do.”

“Then why are you doing this?”

“It’s something I have to do.”

***

The performance is over.

Both performances are over.

But the feeling of despair is still there.

It is not an act, not anymore.

“Don’t wait up.”

Kame looks at Jin with a question in his eyes.

“It’s just dinner with an old friend.”

“It’s her, isn’t it?”

“Kazuya, don’t. Not here, not now.”

The other members are milling around.

He does not want to cause a scene.

He smiles through his brokenness.

“Go.”

“Thank you.”

Kame wants to hug Jin, but Jin is already walking away.

Down the long corridor.

Kame stares as Jin’s back gets smaller.

She is waiting for Jin.

Jin puts his hand on the small of her back, leading her out through the back door.

Kame cringes but focuses on one thing, love, the love he has for Jin.

***

“I told you not to wait up.”

“I can’t sleep.”

“Why? Tell me.”

“Because, when I close my eyes, I see things, things that hurt, things that I don’t want to see.”

“And yet, you let me go.”

“I can’t hold on to you if you don’t want me to.”

“I don’t want you to.”

“Oh.”

“Kazuya, look at me. Please?”

Kame looks and sees bright, shiny, emotional eyes.

"It's done. Finished. A chapter closed. Now and for always, I want to hold on to you.”

Kissing. Familiar, passionate, heartbreaking, wound healing. Love.

“Kazuya.”

“Yes, Jin?”

“When I close my eyes, do you know what I see?”

“What do you see?”

“I see only you.”

[Fan Fic] The One Where Jin Is Cold

Thu, 10 Dec 2009 01:11:30 GMT

Title: The One Where Jin Is Cold
Author: blinkbling24
Pairing: Akame
Genre: Fluff, Crack
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.
Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the accidental grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.
Summary: Jin is cold, and Kame is, well, Kame.
A/N: The weather's becoming very cold, and I seem to be inspired to write when there's a change in weather. And besides, there are several issues about Jin that has been brewing in me, and what better way to tell Jin then to let Kame do it :) This is a fluffy one!
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The words “morning” and “cold” are Jin’s least favourite words in the dictionary, be it in English or Japanese, or in any other language that has those words as part of its vocabulary, which, essentially, are all languages. He barely even tolerates one of those words, so imagine Jin’s mood when he gets hit by both of them.

And he is. Right this very moment.

He stirs from under the mound of thick duvet that he has wrapped tightly around him like a cocoon and wonders half-heartedly the reason he has been so rudely woken up. Then, he shivers. Goddammit! It’s fuckin’ cold. He heaves a deep breath of bravery and sticks an arm out, searching for something on the bedside table.

That something he is reaching blindly for – the remote control to turn on the A/C which he has set to heater mode 2 weeks ago – is not there, neither is the bedside table for that matter. He pulls his arm back under the covers and curses how his arm is already cold from being exposed to the elements for a mere 10 seconds.

Damn. He is not in his bed. This only means one thing. He is in Kame’s bed. Jin groans and attempts to curl the duvet tighter around him, if it is even possible. He is wrapped so tight not even a mosquito could find a crack to get through to bite his bare ass. Mosquitoes die a well deserved death in winter, Jin briefly muses before settling on the fact that he is a completely naked filling in his self-made comforter gyoza.

Wait a minute. Jin rolls himself to Kame’s side of the bed. He is unwilling to pop his head out into the cold, and rolling is the only way to find out if Kame was still in bed with him. As expected, Kame’s side of the bed is empty.

Jin wills himself to get warm, even as he berates Kame under his breath. That man is impervious to the cold, which explains the lack of heating equipment in his bedroom. Who fucking wears bermudas and slippers on a fishing expedition at the tail end of autumn anyway? Oh. Jin stops his thoughts. He remembers how he had let slip their bedroom conversation by “guessing” correctly during the recording of that episode, and he shudders, not sure if it’s from the cold, or from the recollection of Kame’s icy treatment of him after the cameras were turned off. Jin’s pretty sure it’s from the cold though, because Kame has since forgiven him.

What time is it? It still feels like morning. If not for the fact that Jin does indeed need to get up sometime before 12 noon because of an early afternoon schedule, he is usually not inclined to ask that question. The fact that Kame is not in bed with him does nothing to indicate the time of day – Kame has an unfathomable habit, to Jin at least, of waking up early regardless of schedule, and Kame also has the infuriating habit of letting Jin sleep in until the very last possible minute before he wakes Jin up in the rudest ways possible, none of which involves sex or the prelude to sex, in which case, Jin would gladly wake up for. Unfortunately, those instances are often left to special occasions, as stipulated in Kame’s rule book.

It is getting too cold to bear in his naked form. Jin gallantly throws the comforter off himself, in hope to grab his boxers, jeans and flannel shirt off the floor where he is sure were strewn during last night’s nocturnal activity and put them on. Alas, it is not to be. They are nowhere in sight, Kame must have put them in the wash as he usually does just to get on Jin’s nerves, and the thought of getting up and walking 2 metres to Kame’s wardrobe to grab his spare set of clothes is enough to send Jin back into the gyoza like state.

“Kame??! Kame!!!!!! KAMENASHI KAZUYA!!!!!!!!!”

Jin hears shuffling from beyond the bedroom door for a couple of seconds before it opens excruciatingly slowly, allowing Jin the gradual sight of his boyfriend dressed in a t-shirt and a pair of shorts that are actually for running, but Kame uses it to lounge around at home.

Forgetting himself for a minute, Jin asks, “Aren’t you fucking cold, you freak?” only it comes out muffled, because only his eyes are peering out from under the duvet.

“I have been sitting at the kotatsu drinking my coffee, and reading.” It does not really answer Jin’s question, but that question is purely rhetorical anyway.

“I’m cold.”

Kame ignores Jin and drops a couple of magazines on the bed, making sure they open exactly where he wants Jin to see them.

“Did you hear me? I’m cold.” Jin pretends not to see what Kame wants him to.

“I heard you. I’m not. What’s your point?”

“What’s YOUR point?” Jin’s voice is still muffled.

“What are these?” Kame gestures at the array of magazines lined up haphazardly as he sits on the bed by Jin’s side. Kame must have been catching up on his reading. Unlike normal people, Kame is too busy to read magazines off the bat. He accumulates them and reads them all at one go when he has time, which is this morning, and the subject of his reading is Jin.

Jin rolls his eyes and looks, “My BANDAGE promotion magazine articles.”

“Do you think I’m stupid?”

“I didn’t say that. You have a hearing problem.” It’s too cold and too morning for Jin to really process Kame’s abnormal thought progressions.

“I KNOW it’s your BANDAGE promotion articles. I’m asking about this.” He points at several pages as though he’s stabbing them with a penknife.

“I have no fucking idea what you’re trying to kill with your finger,” Jin shifts. A cold draft seems to be coming from Kame’s direction.

“I thought we had an agreement that no one sees your bedroom eyes but me?”

“Huh?” Jin blinks cluelessly, “When did we make that agreement?”

Kame stares at Jin for a long while, completely unsympathetic of the fact that Jin is shivering uncontrollably.

“Fuck. It must have been during sex.”

Makes sense, thinks Jin, Kame remembers a lot of things during sex, about the sex, that he doesn’t.

“I’m an idol.” As though that answers Kame’s question. Jin’s teeth are chattering.

“And I’m not?” Kame raises an eyebrow and Jin thinks that today is probably the day Kame’s special eyebrow technician is coming to work miracles. Kame treasures his eyebrow technician, because that lady gives him the most awesome eyebrows, the envy of many an idol. Although, Jin does not really care, he wishes Kame treasures him more than his beloved eyebrow technician sometimes.

Jin recalls his conversation with Yamapi on the subject:

“He invited his eyebrow technician to his brother’s wedding, and I can’t even go lest the paparazzi pounce on me, on us.”

“Heck, Jin, if I had his eyebrow technician, I’ll marry her, much less just invite her to my brother’s wedding.”

“Pi, you’re not helping!”

Shit. Kame’s dratted eyebrows are still raised expectant of a reply.

“We’re supposed to do bedroom eyes, and do and wear other sexy stuff to sell these glossy pieces of shit.”

“Oh? Is that why you insist on wearing your limited number of fedoras and grow pubic hair on your chin?” The mock epiphany in Kame’s voice is obvious.

“OY!” Jin almost jumps out of bed, but remembers just in time that it would not be a wise idea. His balls will freeze, and it will not bode well for his and Kame’s relationship if that happens, although the annoyance level of the relationship is higher than usual at the moment. “I thought you thought my fedoras and my bristles are hot.”

“Moderation, my dear, dear Jin. You wear your fedoras so often, people are going to think you’re hiding a bald spot like Nakai-senpai. And the poor attempt at growing a goatee, it doesn’t make you any more of a man than you already are not. Besides, I DO NOT LIKE IT WHEN I GET BRISTLE BURNS!” Kame explodes, showing Jin a spot on his arm with apparent bristle burns but Jin doesn’t see nothin’, and then composes himself, looking at Jin with a calmness that was disconcerting.

“You so totally do bedroom eyes too, and you’re giving me grief?”

From Kame’s absolute lack of a reaction, Jin reckons his words froze in the cold air and broke into tiny ice particles, never to be heard again.

“Speaking about appearance, when are you going to cut your hair? Get that done, and while you’re at it, please put on some weight. It’s not becoming of you to be as thin as, well, me. ” Kame picks up a magazine, and flips to a page where he’s on it, and proceeds to admire himself.

“You do know that it’s all digitally enhanced, you’re not that flawless,” Jin retorts as he burrows into the folds. This conversation with Kame was making him even colder, if that’s possible, “and besides, what if I want to be skinnier so that I can wear your clothes? Warm clothes that are hanging in that wardrobe, which I can’t fit into now, dammit.”

Kame clicks his tongue, and then shrugs, “I do have nicer clothes than you do, can’t blame you.”

“Kame!”

“What? Stop whining. You’re such a child.”

“I’m cold, and I’m not a child. I’m just bringing us back to the original subject of this conversation.”

“What do you want me to do about it?”

Jin does not reply. Instead he wriggles like a perverted caterpillar in his cocoon. Kame shakes his head and removes the magazines off the bed, stacking them neatly by the side. Kame shifts, and yanks hard so that Jin releases a bit of the duvet for Kame to worm his way into the cave that Jin has made.

“Mmmm….” Jin murmurs appreciatively as Kame cuddles up.

“Better?” Kame spoons Jin, throwing his arm around Jin’s waist.

“How can such a skinny person like you be so warm?” Jin turns, with much effort given the limited space of the duvet cave, to face Kame.

“I would prefer ‘slender’, and, you always say I’m hot,” Kame rubbed his nose against Jin and smiled as Jin purred.

“You are,” Jin nods and pulls Kame into a kiss. “So very hot,” he says as he nibbles the corner of Kame’s mouth, feeling the curve of the lips as Kame widens his grin.

“Jin…Jin…” Kame groans as he feels Jin’s growing erection against his thigh, “you have to get out of bed soon….”

“How soon?” Jin whispers as he grinds himself lazily against Kame while trailing his tongue down Kame’s jawline.

“10 minutes ago,” Kame says quietly as he strokes Jin’s back that is getting slightly sticky from the beginnings of sweat.

“Fuck, and we spent so much time squabbling?” Jin nuzzles his face in the crook of Kame’s neck.

“Mmmmm…..JIN! OW! BRISTLE BURN!” Kame gives Jin’s ass a resounding smack as Jin rubs his chin on Kame’s shoulder.

“Oh fuck. Forgot. Sorry,” Jin sits up, letting his security duvet fall from his shoulders. Jin sweeps his hair off his face and feels the perspiration on his forehead.

“Shit Kame, you really are hot! I’m not feeling cold anymore!” Jin exclaims, incredulous.

“That, and I turned on the electric mattress pad.” Kame throws Jin a wicked smile as Jin starts to get out of bed.

“Electric mattress pad??!! You had it all along, and you let me freeze??!!”

Jin stands with his hands on his hips and Kame admires the view, even as he indignantly replies, “I did NOT let you freeze! How do you think we managed to have sex last night?”

“Oh.” Jin scratches the back of his head, looking sheepish.

“Oh?” Another eyebrow raise from Kame.

“I kinda thought it was because the sex was so hot in itself…..” Jin stops when Kame rolls around the bed in laughter, “You were fucking freezing, and you thought the sex was HOT??!! Well, it was, but the foreplay certainly wasn’t!” Kame is still laughing.

Jin huffs, and attempts to say something, but when a cold breeze drifts by, he feels large goosebumps everywhere, and decides it is wiser just to escape into the confines of a hot shower.

“And Jin,” Kame shouts after him, “I totally told you about the electric mattress pad!”

“No you didn’t! I would have remembered life-saving information like that!” Jin hollers from the shower stall, over the sound of spraying water.

Kame opens his mouth to rebut, and then shuts it again. Right. He really should stop telling Jin important things during sex.

“Jin!”

“Yeah?!”

“SHAVE! NO SEX TILL YOU DO!”

“THEN GET IN HERE AND DO IT FOR ME!”

That lazy git, Kame thinks as he strips out of his clothes and opens the bathroom door. Oh well. He does need a shower. He has a schedule in the afternoon too. But before that, an eyebrow appointment.

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 14

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 04:58:28 GMT

Title: Fragments
Author: blinkbling24
Pairing: Akame, Kokame
Genre: Angst, Romance, Smut
Rating: NC-17 (As there will be smut in subsequent chapters)
Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.
Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.
Summary: In life and love, you can’t have everything that you want, or can you?
A/N: This is my first multi-chaptered fic. I don’t know how long this will be yet. I’ll see how it goes as I write. This story is set in the near past, but will go back to the further past and play around with the timeline quite a bit, and it might get a little messy. I’ll try to be as faithful to the timeline as possible, but my memory might not serve me well, and I might just change things a bit and add a few imaginary dates, using my creative license.
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Chapter 14
Mid April 2008 – Recording of the Don’t You Ever Stop PV

It was barely the crack of dawn. Jin was riding his bike through the quiet early morning streets. The sky was beginning to light up, with the sun just a slice of orange in the horizon. With his helmet visor up, he relished the cool spring breeze on his face, feeling the winds that he had summoned as his bike cut through the air move through his biker’s jacket. Ordinarily, he hated mornings, but this morning, it felt different. It was a new day, and Jin was, for the first time in a long time, somewhat at peace. It has been a while since he last saw Kame, their schedules had not crossed these couple of weeks. They had gotten all of the month’s filming of Cartoon KAT-TUN out of the way, and have been going for their separate photoshoots, and solo recordings for the new album. Perhaps the JE managers decided to separate Kame and Jin for the recordings based on the recent disaster. Whatever it was, Jin was thankful for the reprieve. The space gave him some time to think, before they got busy again promoting the new album and preparing for the concert tour, amidst the other regular things they had to do.

Kame had not replied his one and only email since the tryst, and even though it ate at Jin for a while, he gradually decided to let sleeping dogs lie, as the saying goes. He arrived at this decision after the recording of the Cartoon KAT-TUN “Jitsu wa Boku” episode. The air of animosity between him and Kame would never dissipate in Jin’s opinion, and he had somehow adopted the masochistic habit of observing Kame and Koki’s interaction with each other from afar. During that recording, he witnessed how Koki was so nervous performing his little piano piece, and how Kame’s eyes glowed with affection and pride, and encouraged Koki so sincerely. Jin had reluctantly acknowledged that there was warmth in that relationship, and if Kame so chose to stay with Koki, who was Jin to destroy what both of them had?

Spending some days with Yamapi also aided the process. Yamapi had a knack for dealing with Jin, particularly heavily drunk Jin. Yamapi would say things that needed to be said, even if it was things that Jin did not really want to hear.

“You’re bad for him, Jin.”

“Why can’t it be that he’s the one bad for me? I thought you are my friend.”

“I am, but at the moment, you are on the brink of breaking up something good. And as your friend, I have to try to stop you.”

“He launched himself at me, Pi.”

“Yes, but you mar his judgement. You’re his poison Jin.”

“Maybe I’m his drug, and he’s addicted to me.”

“Do you really want it to be like that Jin?”

“I….er…..”

“Koki is good for him, Jin. Koki’s good for his career, for his heart.”

“And I’m not?”

“You left, you idiot…how many times must people tell you that? You left him in the lurch. He had to shoulder everything by himself. It was Koki that saw him through thick and thin, not you.”

“But…he…I…”

“And furthermore, you’ll hurt Koki.”

Yamapi was right, of course. A person from outside looking in usually had a better perspective on things, and when Jin pushed all the rashness out of his thoughts, he saw what Yamapi saw, what everybody saw. Reluctantly, Jin told himself to let go, and when he finally released his grip a little, he realized that he could breathe better. It’s time to let go of what could have been and make the best of the present, Jin told himself. His amiable mood resulted in him agreeing to this ungodly call time. He parked his bike in the open air parking space outside of the film studio and swaggered his way to the dressing room where the hair stylist was waiting for him.

***

A roar of a motorcycle’s engine announced the arrival of Kame and Koki. It was a perfect spring morning and Koki had insisted on taking his bike out. Kame had smiled his consent while grabbing his very own helmet that hung on the wall of their apartment. Very seldom was Kame pillion when Koki rode – their schedules did not coincide that much, and when it did, Kame was usually the one that drove them to the wherever they were supposed to be.

Ever since he made the conscious decision to stay with Koki, Kame had tried to get other thoughts out of his head. Most times, he would do ok. Koki was, after all, an amazing person and Kame knew he was lucky to have him. But it was times like this, when things he did with Koki reminded him of things he did with Jin that made it a little bit difficult. He had to remind himself that glowing ember was safe and comforting, compared to menacing licks of flames that, although exciting, was dangerous. He did not want to get burnt, he had gotten hurt once and it was more than enough. Besides, why should he subject himself to emotional injury when he had someone that would protect him from it?

It was with this attitude that he entered the big grey container building that was the studio. Kame was aware that this was the first time in a couple of weeks that he would come face to face with Jin. He braced himself as Koki twisted the door knob to the dressing room.

“Good morning! You two are almost late!” They were greeted by a bright, toothy grin that belonged to Taguchi.

“The key word being ‘almost’, we’re not late yet”, Koki smiled his reply as he walked to the costume rack.

“Are you the only one here?” Kame drawled, pretending to look unconcerned as he scanned the room that was a mess of hair products, make-up, and various articles of clothing.

“The rest are already in costume. They left to stroll around the set. Apparently, we have a fully functional casino and pinball machines on set. I want to finish up this level before I join them,” Taguchi raised his Nintendo DS to prove his point.

So Kame had time to put his game face on. He always felt more confident being around Jin in costume, because it meant that it was work, and nothing more. It was easy for Kame to be professional, to hide his emotions behind the job. It was harder to keep his emotions in check outside of that safety net. He joined Koki at the rack, and frowned when he inspected the transparent garment bag with his name on it. In it was a dubious pair of socks that just screamed ridicule. He caught Koki’s amused look and sighed. At least it’d make for a funny “making of” video, if Maru had any say in it.

***

Civility was the order of the day, thought Jin when he saw Kame walk through the heavy double doors. He caught Kame’s gaze and nodded his greeting. He saw Kame’s eyes widen a little, perhaps shocked that Jin had acknowledged him first. When Kame tilted his head back in greeting with a slight smirk on his lips, Jin knew that Kame was being cautiously friendly, and it was enough for Jin.

Be friendly to Jin, be friendly to Jin, Kame kept chanting to himself as he walked up on set. He was determined to finish today’s filming without drama, but when he laid eyes on Jin, he did a double take. Jin just had to make it all that more complicated. He hitched a breath as he appreciated Jin with his hair braided and pinned back, accentuating his sharp jaw line that would normally be hidden behind messy tendrils. Kame managed a civil nod of greeting, but decided that he should just stick close to Koki, or any one of the other members, the rest of the day.

Their mutual ceasefire proved to be somewhat working. Jin helped Kame pick up his hat during the recording of the dance sequence, and it seemed like the most natural thing to do. He even heard Kame mutter a quiet word of thanks. Kame took part in a little Jin teasing with the rest of the gang, and it felt like a semblance of normalcy was being restored.

It wasn’t so hard, Kame prematurely admitted as he walked the corridors to the restroom after he finished his solo shoot. He was done for the day, and had already changed out of his costume into his day clothes. He was waiting around for Koki to be done so that they can leave together. Kame pushed open the restroom door and stepped up to the sink. He turned on the tap and splashed some water on his face, now devoid of the thick foundation that was caked on it almost the entire day. The cold water refreshed him, and got rid of some of the tired strain ever present in his features. He closed his eyes and cracked his neck. Just as he did so, he heard a toilet flush and someone stepped out of a stall behind him.

“Kame.”

Heaving a quiet breath, Kame opened his eyes to meet with Jin’s in the mirror. Jin was still in his costume as it was not yet his turn for the solo shoot. More disturbingly, Jin still looked as hot as he did in the morning with that hair, that jaw line.

“Jin.”

Jin stepped up to claim the sink next to Kame. It was an awkward couple of seconds as Jin washed his hands, and Kame, well, Kame just stood there, staring at Jin through the mirror. Jin flung his hands over the sink to shake off the excess droplets.

“Erm…Jin?”

Was Kame initiating conversation? Jin walked to the paper towel dispenser to mask his puzzlement.

“Yup, what’s up?”

Where was this casual manner coming from? Was Jin really not pursuing the issue?

“I’m…errr….sorry I didn’t reply your email.”

Kame could not believe he just said that. In embarrassment, he too walked up to grab a paper towel and dried his face with it.

“Oh, erm, I wasn’t expecting one. I shouldn’t have sent it.”

Did it really not matter anymore? Kame froze slightly.

“Remember how you said you wanted to be a friendly colleague?”

“Yes, I did say that.” Jin raised an eyebrow, and Kame had to look away from the sheer effect that tiny movement had on him.

“I would like that. It would be good for KAT-TUN.”

“Ok.” All for the good of KAT-TUN, as usual, Jin thought bitterly.

“Ok?"

“Yeah,” Jin shrugged, “I said ok, I can do that.”

“Don’t you want me anymore?” The question slipped out even before Kame could process it.

"WHAT?” Jin reeled. Kame never failed to throw a spanner into the works. He squeezed the area between his eyes with his thumb and index finger. “Kame, I’m tired. I don’t want to play anymore.”

“YOU’RE tired?!” Kame could not believe Jin just said that. If anyone were to be tired, it should be him, but he sucked it up and let it go. “Forget it. You’re right. Let’s not play anymore. In fact, let’s not fight anymore. Let’s not do anything that involves the two of us anymore.”

Jin nodded and stretched on his right hand, “Colleagues?” But even as he said the word, his heart mourned the loss of the friendship he used to have with Kame. Is this all it has been reduced to?

“Colleagues.”

Kame accepted Jin’s hand and shook it. Kame shook it for a long while, unable to let go. When he felt Jin try to pull away, he reached his left hand up to cup Jin’s cheek. He stroked the area behind Jin’s ear and Jin could not breathe. He looked into Kame’s eyes and saw sadness and resignation. But before he could react, before he could say anything, Kame leaned in and placed his lips to his ear.

“Goodbye, Jin.” Kame whispered, and then he was gone, leaving Jin standing there all alone, and, and……

Fuck.

***

The elevator button was about to loosen from Jin’s incessant pressing on it, and yet, the carriage was moving too slowly, trying his threadbare patience. Cursing loudly, he took to the stairs, as many at a time that he could manage without falling over, until he found himself at the front door, panting, breathless. Jin didn’t think much, even though thinking would hold him back from going through with it. There was not much space in his mind to think, all he knew was the insatiable want he felt in every fibre of his being that only one person could quell. Jin raised his fist and rapped loudly and repeatedly on the door.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK knockknockknockknock KNOCK!

The door swung open, and through his crazed eyes, Jin saw Kame’s expression change from annoyance to shock to confusion in that one millisecond. Jin pushed himself in and shut the door behind him, giving Kame no chance to protest.

“Is Koki home?” Jin said through pants and gritted teeth, steadying himself with a hand on the wall.

“What?! You come barging here, looking like you just ran a marathon, just to ask if Koki’s home?” Kame swallowed, trying to use sarcasm to mask whatever feeling that was swirling in him that he could not name.

Jin’s eyes never left Kame’s face, but he let his breathing regulate a little bit before he repeated his question, “Is Koki home?”

“No, he’s out with old high school friends and you should…..”

“Good.” Jin interrupted and before Kame could say anything more, he cupped Kame’s cheeks with both his hands and pulled Kame in for a desperate, desperate kiss. Jin closed his eyes and gripped the back of Kame’s head with his fingers, kissing, sucking, licking, pushing, until Kame’s back hit a wall in the living room.

As Jin’s lips landed on his, Kame’s first instinct was to return it with as much forbidden desire, with as much painful anguish that he felt in the way Jin kissed. But he did not, instead he fought within himself, not quite able to push Jin away, but trying with all his might not to encourage anything. When Kame felt his back hit the wall, he placed his hands on Jin’s arms, arms that were flexed so goddamn deliciously, and pushed to lower them from his face.

“Jin…” he could only murmur against hot lips, so hot, against his own, “Jin….no….”

“Kazuya….”Jin whispered with such reluctance as he moved off Kame. He pressed his sweaty forehead on Kame’s smooth one and looked deep into those wide caramel eyes.

Don’t look at me like that Jin. Kame tried to convey with his thoughts, but he was drowning, drowning in those pools filled with excruciating want, a want that mirrored his own, and he knew he could never win. He was exhausted, extremely exhausted, of holding it together, of being in control, of doing what was right.

“Jin, I……” Kame breathed as he tilted the back of his head to the wall and closed his eyes.

“Shhh….I know, I know……” Jin’s lips travelled gently down Kame’s jaw, suckling that soft spot where his jaw met his neck.

Kame sighed and brought his hands to Jin’s face, pulling it up to meet his lips. This time, Kame kissed Jin, slowly, savouring the very essence of Jin that took his breath away all those years ago. Jin accepted Kame’s tongue willingly, allowing, reciprocating every suck, every lick, every caress. Jin heard every single one of Kame’s silent sounds as they kissed, and he felt his heart melt into a puddle in the pits of his stomach. Jin closed the distance between their bodies, and grinded himself against Kame. He groaned as Kame hissed and bucked his hips, and suddenly, things were moving at a speed that was suffocating.

Their kiss became rougher, fiercer, chaffing. Their hands roamed everywhere they could touch, under their t-shirts, through the backs of their pants. The sounds, oh good god, the sounds that they were making, full of unrestrained lust, were burning Kame up. His eyes were shut tight, but he could see Jin clearly, Jin with his searing kisses and scorching touches. And Kame was on fire. The flames licked him everywhere, and as much as it hurt, he wanted more, he needed more.

Jin pushed away from Kame to yank his t-shirt over his head, watching with piercing dark eyes as Kame did the same. He reached for Kame’s chest to tweak Kame’s nipples just as Kame reached to rid Jin off his jeans and boxers. Kame’s loud cry caused Jin’s already rock hard cock to twitch, shamelessly standing rim rod straight, ready to claim what he knew was his. He rid Kame of his sweatpants, and hoisted Kame up only to have Kame’s legs wrap immediately around him.

There was no room for pause, no room for anything but the sweat of dirty dirty sex, steaming the little apartment. Blind, Jin searched for Kame as Kame lowered himself, and when he felt the hot velvet walls engulf his being, he emitted a growl so primal and caused Kame to shiver and bury his face in Jin’s shoulder. He responded to every single one of Jin’s hard thrust, feeling Jin’s cock dipping in and out, never feeling so filled, and it was so fucking good. He griped Jin harder as Jin snaked an arm to the front and began stroking Kame’s hard, painful cock.

“Oh..fuck…Jin…Jin….this…AH!..so…hnnn…wrong….” The guilt, the pleasure, the remorse, the very feel of Jin, was turning Kame on so much that he felt sick, but yet, did not want it to stop, he could not stop.

“But. Heargh. It. Feels. So. Fucking. Right.” Jin said with much effort to every single thrust, and as he felt Kame’s hands move down his back to push him further into him, all Jin could see was flashes of white behind his closed eyes.

As Jin’s strokes moved faster, more erratically, following the rhythm of his increasing thrusts, hitting Kame’s sweet sweet spot with undying persistence, Kame stiffened, feeling the pressure grow and tighten in his guts, before he jolted, spilling hot white semen between their bodies. He hugged Jin tighter as he relished his high, still fuelled by the thrusting, the perfect thrusting, hearing “Kazuya” over and over, until he felt Jin’s muscles tense, and then hot liquid filled him, scalding, blistering, molten.

What have we done?
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A/N: Finally momentum is picking up. Sorry it took so long. *looks down at feet* Tell me what you think.
On another note, how happy are you that Jin is having a solo concert?! I for one, am over the moon!!!

[Fan Fic] Autumn thoughts

Tue, 17 Nov 2009 02:49:55 GMT

Title: Autumn thoughts

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame

Genre: Romance

Rating: PG

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the accidental grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: Jin knows Kame

A/N: Autumn has come to Japan, and I'm rather captivated by the beauty of it all. This short one-shot was supposed to be whimsical and descriptive, but I got carried away, as usual, and it resulted in, well, this. I WILL find inspiration for my other 2 fics, I promise.

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Autumn hues of brown, yellow, orange and red were not, and never will be, a choice for Kame where his personal wardrobe was concerned (he could not help what the wardrobe mistress put him in, much to his annoyance). Those colours were unflattering to his porcelain, milky-white skin; they made him look sallow, or sallower, considering how his complexion would often have already been destroyed by the stress, the late nights, the copious amount of coffee, the occasional cigarette, and not to mention the pre, post, and anywhere in between production drinks.

However, as he strolled along the cobbled walkway that meandered the medium-sized park near his apartment, he had to admit that autumn, despite its undesirable apparel patone colours, was a sight to behold. Particularly in the moments before sunset, where the sky joined the vivid tapestry, merging into one enormous, surreal painting. Kame took in a deep breath, and felt the clean crisp air fill his lungs. It was barely 5pm, and for the first time in a long long while, he was done for the day. It was slightly disconcerting, a feeling he usually had when he starts his downtime. He would feel a tad bit lost without all the hustle and bustle of work, but he would get used to it quickly, and never failed to enjoy the precious little free time he had.

Kame took his time walking through the park, dressed in a perfectly fitted pair of rugged jeans (what else?) tucked neatly in clunky boots, with a black hooded parker pulled over a checked, flannel shirt. His eyes were shaded by a subtly expensive pair of sunglasses. His hair was newly dyed, with its honeyed strands glinting where the rays of the setting sun hit. He looked like he came out of a page of a magazine, but that statement was almost too literal to be used on him. He was Kamenashi Kazuya after all. Despite this, he was blissfully left alone, even though the park was buzzing with activity.

A pretty little kaninchen dachshund, rather similar to his own, pranced up and sniffed his boot. Kame knelt down and welcomed the licks the dog unleashed on his face. Kame chuckled. He looked up and acknowledged the owner, telling her how cute her dog was. She thanked him with a confused look on her face as she went on her way, where had she seen him before? Before she had the time to figure it out, Kame ducked out of sight, not relishing the thought of another fan sighting report on the Internet.

Sounds of cheering led Kame to a clearing. The green field was littered with fallen leaves, and he could hear the crunches as young boys darted around. There were 2 things going on in that clearing. Half of it was filled with baseball kids, the other half, soccer. Kame stood, with his hands in his parka pockets, at the edge of the field, right where the invisible line separated the two. He guided his gaze to the baseball crowd, and looked on fondly at the enthusiasm on the kids’ faces – smiles that took up half their little faces, eyes gleaming bright. He was once one of those kids, where baseball was all he cared for in the world. As he often did, he wondered what his life would be like if he had not danced his heart out at that audition 11 years ago. Would he have already kissed the grass on the sacred grounds of the Koshien stadium, rather than being a high school dropout that he was? Maybe he would have found fame as part of the Tokyo Giants, rather than being famous for what he did now.

“Onii-san! Could you kick the ball back to us?” Kame was snapped out of his thoughts by a shrill voice. He looked down at his feet to see a soccer ball roll up and nestle between his booted toes. He grinned and positioned the ball before giving it a solid kick into the makeshift soccer pitch. He watched as the boys scrambled for the ball, with expressions no different from the ones he saw on the baseball boys. Kame thought about someone he knew, someone he met 11 years ago. Did that someone hold the same thoughts he did? Would that someone be the next Nakata Hidetoshi if he had not returned that dratted number plate, sealing his fate in an industry that he had tried, once, and maybe still subconsciously trying, to run away from?

More importantly, how different would their lives have been if not for that day, all those years ago?

Kame let his eyes travel beyond the clearing, looking past the trees in the park. A little further in the distance were buildings where 2 billboards hung. Kame stared with awkward indifference at his own face blown to a size 50 times bigger. It was old, advertising for Dreamboys that had already ended its run. Beside it, on the next building, with the word “BANDAGE” splashed ceremoniously across, was Jin in all his grunge rock glory. Kame looked from one to another, how they were side by side. This was their life together, in a world where their presence was as big as the billboards, where their actions were scrutinized and where innocent little slip-ups almost inevitable became dangerously huge.

“A penny for your thoughts,” a gruff whisper came from behind.

Kame smiled but did not turn around. He felt a slight breeze as the figure made his way to his side, and it suddenly felt comfortingly warm.

“You’re off early.”

“Yeah, well, waking up at 4am to go live on morning television does have its unexpected perks, although I’ll probably want to go to sleep soon, give me 3 hours.”

“You talk too much.”

“You think too much.”

Still smiling, Kame turned to face Jin, who was looking at him affectionately under a lowly peaked black fedora. “How did you know I was here?”

“I didn’t. I went to your place. But since you weren’t in, I thought I’d come here to pick up some chicks while waiting for you.” Jin joked.

“Idiot,” Kame responded without a hint of malice.

“I know you, Kazuya, 11 years don’t count for nothing.”

Jin watched as Kame silently acknowledged what he said. On his part, he recognized Kame’s slightly melancholy mood, and followed his gaze to the boys playing in the field. Jin frowned a little when his saw his billboard juxtaposed in the background. He never liked the attention being in the industry brought him. He enjoyed the work but hated the lack of privacy. He envied his old soccer buddies who were able to finish school, start their families and still play soccer every weekend. Simple luxuries that Jin did not have, something that, ironically, fame could not give him.

“Are you liking your solo outing?” Kame asked out of the blue.

“Are you going all senpai on me?” Jin grinned.

Kame raised an eyebrow, “Maybe?”

“It’s a chore,” Jin shrugged, only meaning half of the annoyance conveyed in his answer.

“It is, isn’t it?” Kame emitted a small laugh.

“I’ll live.”

“You will. You’re Akanishi Jin.”

“And you’re Kamenashi Kazuya.”

The baseball and soccer boys in the field were packing up to go home. The sky was getting dark, and it was time for dinner. Kame returned the enthusiastic waves of the boys with a subdued one of his own, before turning to Jin, “Wouldn’t it be nice if our names mean so little, if our names were just part of the crowd?”

Jin did not answer immediately. Instead, he inched closer to Kame so that their arms almost touch.

“It would be nice,” Jin admitted.

Kame sighed and looked down at his feet, “Our lives would be so different, ne?”

Jin nodded, and went on with his answer, “But then I would never have known Kamenashi Kazuya. For all the things my life would have been if it was not this life, now that I know you, Kazuya, I would not want to be without you. And if this is the life that lets me have you, then so be it.”

There it was. Jin was hardly the romantic, and hardly said the right words, but when he did, it was words so perfect, said with the intimate knowledge of who Kame was, and what Kame was thinking, said with such ease from a person that has known Kame for most of his life.

Unable to come up with anything that could match Jin’s words, all Kame did was lean towards Jin and place his head on his shoulder, but only for a brief second. It was all Jin needed to know that it was Kame’s way of saying the exact same thing. It was times like this that made everything worth it.

Of course, the beautiful moment had to be rudely interrupted by the rumble of Jin’s stomach. Kame laughed, “You hungry?”

“Understatement of the century!”

“My apartment, then. Pasta?”

“You know me.”

They walked the five minutes in companionable silence. Jin waited patiently as Kame fumbled with the lock. Jin allowed Kame to take the first step in, which Kame did, and immediately proceeded to the kitchen. While Jin was taking out his shoes in the foyer (damn these lace-ups), Kame’s voice suddenly rang out, “Oh Jin, I think red suits me after all,” which left Jin absolutely flabbergasted. Just as he thought he’s got Kame all figured out. Oh well, Jin thought, he would just have to work harder to know Kame inside out, completely.

[Fan Fic] Supernova - Chapter 6

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 05:36:13 GMT

Title: SUPERNOVA
Author: blinkbling24
Genre: AU, Angst (a little I think), Sci-Fi (a bit of a cross between X-men and Heroes), Smut (maybe)
Rating: R to NC-17 (to be safe)
Warning: Unbeta-ed, so please excuse accidental grammer and/or spelling errors, if any.
Summary: Akanishi Jin has always been the blue-eyed boy of the Academy. What happens when one day Kamenashi Kazuya joins the folds? What role do they play in each other's lives, and can they use what is given to them to save what they hold dear?
Author's Notes: This was actually a summer contest entry 2009 for the akame_community but I had to pull out because I could not finish it in time. I'm trying to revive the inspiration for this, because I quite like what I have going for it. It's proving to be complicated though, so be patient with me.
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Chapter 6

“What does this mean, Haru?” Jin was in Haru’s room, in her bed, with her cuddled up next to him. Jin came to Haru’s bed regularly, ever since she willingly opened her arms to him, when she was 17 years old, and he was 19, after the annual Academy Christmas party. They had both been pleasantly tipsy, and it had culminated in a night of clumsy, yet sweet sex. It was the first time for the both of them, and it was that night that Haru fell in love with Jin, gentle, compassionate Akanishi Jin. It was that night that Haru swore she would do anything to make Jin happy.

For Jin, he loved Haru in his own way, Haru was one of his best friends, but he was not sure if he was in love with her. He had always thought that there should be more to falling in love. There should be fireworks, more fanfare than what he felt with Haru. But, Haru was familiar, and Jin was content with familiar, or so he thought.

“It means that your power is growing. You should be pleased, Jin,” Haru did not know why the incident affected Jin so much. She felt nothing but a swirl of confusion within him. She frowned.

“Are you tapping into my emotions again?” Jin asked kindly, snuggling her closer into his chest. Haru simply smiled and wrapped her arms around his waist.

“You know,” Jin continued, “I always thought I would be happy seeing my father in my travels, but I’m not. Instead, it feels unusual. My power feels unusual. I can’t put a finger on it, it feels like it was blocked, and it got unclogged for a little bit, but it has been corked back. I tried going back to that time again, but I can’t. It’s frustrating.”

“Maybe this is just the way your power is developing,” Haru knew that whatever she said would not comfort Jin. There was nothing else she could do but to stay by his side, to just be there for him.

“Mmmmz,” Jin responded, unconvinced. Yet, he managed a warm smile as he leaned to kiss her on the lips. Haru melted into the kiss, thinking that there’s no place she would rather be but in these arms. Jin moved to hover over her, unbuttoning her pajama top. He spread the top opened and cupped her breasts. He lowered himself to kiss her again, kneading her breasts gently, thumbs grazing her pink nipples lightly. Haru arched and her hands wandered under Jin’s t-shirt to feel the strong sinews in his back. Jin lowered his kisses into her cleavage, and then onto her soft abdomen, his hands feeling her womanly curves. He removed her pajama pants and smiled to see that she was wearing his favourite g-string. He moved himself up and was greeted by her sweet smile. He placed his hand through the front of the g-string onto her neat triangle, and used his fingers to feel her wetness. She moaned and closed her eyes, and he felt his cock twitch in his loose sleep pants. His fingers did their job, caressing her hard nodule, until she purred and jerked as she climaxed, whispering his name.

Haru pushed Jin onto his back. She removed his pants, and took his erection into her mouth. She licked and sucked, and Jin closed his eyes to savour the high. He groaned as he saw in his mind’s eye caramel molten eyes looking tenderly at him. He imagined kissing those eyes shut, peppering the face those eyes belonged to with butterfly pecks, finally meeting with sensual lips that curled into the most beautiful smile he had ever seen. Jin made a sound at the back of his throat as he felt himself nearing release. He pictured those lips saying his name, “Jin…Jin….I want you….” With a tone so filled with lust. He climaxed into Haru’s mouth, moaning a name, “Kame….”

***

Jin was absolutely distraught. He looked at the devastated face of the woman in front of him. They were both now dressed, and sat awkwardly next to each other on the bed. All Jin wanted to do was to run away, being the typical non-confrontational male that he was. But he valued Haru too much. He owed her an explanation, but he did not know how to explain things to her when he could not even explain it to himself. He buried his face in his palms.

"You don’t have to say anything, Jin,” she said quietly. Haru knew. She knew the minute she lowered herself on him, when he closed his eyes. She felt his heart pound more furiously than she ever felt it pound whenever they were having sex, and she knew it was not because of her. Her eyes had welled with tears, but she continued her task, it was her goodbye, even as she felt her heart shatter into a million pieces.

“But I want to….I….” Jin tried.

“Sshhhh….” She placed a finger on his lips. He watched as she attempted a small smile. Jin did not need to have Haru’s power to know that her heart was completely broken.

“I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry,” Jin lowered his head, wishing that he could fix her heart.

“You love him.” Her voice was broken.

“No…no…that’s not it….” He denied, not knowing what he felt.

“You love him,” she repeated firmly, “what I feel in you towards him is what I feel towards you. The fireworks, the fanfare, it’s there Jin, it’s there in your heart, for him.”

Jin wanted to embrace her, but Haru moved away. She stood up and walked towards the window, her back now facing him.

“Haru, please….”

“Just go, Jin, go to him.”

“I…I…” Jin surrendered and bowed his head, “I don’t think he feels like that about me.”

Sighing, Haru acknowledged how Jin viewed her, a friend, a confidante, but not the love of his life. She turned and managed a figment of a smile. He was looking at her with sad eyes, sadder than she had ever seen in him.

“You’ll just have to be brave and find out. But, I can tell you this, it’s pretty hard not to love Akanishi Jin.”

It was then that Jin smiled. Haru was still willing to be his friend, “Thank you, Haru. I can’t do without you. I love you, you know that right?"

“I know,” Haru walked up to hug Jin tight, one last time, before pushing him to the door.

“Go.”

Jin opened the door and was almost walking out when Haru stopped him.

“Jin?”

“Yeah?” He turned, trying to read her eyes.

She paused for a moment, “Nothing. Just….be careful, ok?”

“I will.” Jin nodded as he left.

Be careful with Kamenashi, Jin. I can’t feel him at all, and I don’t know who he is. I don’t want you to get hurt.

Haru curled up into a ball on her bed, smelling Jin’s scent on her pillow. She allowed her tears to fall, she allowed herself heavy sobs, mourning for the love she could never have with the man she loved.

***

Kame was lying awake on his bed, fighting sleep even though it was coming at him in giant waves. He shook his head and blinked, and wondered if there was anyone out there with powers that can rejuvenate the self without sleeping. He really wanted that ability. Every day, with the amount of control and focus he had to muster, he would be exhausted at the end of it, and yet, he dreaded sleeping.

Recently, he had been having dreams. He had never had dreams ever since he discovered he was special. His constant need to be in control meant that his mind, although in sleep, did not fully relax. Sleep, however, did provide him some rest, and he had come to accept this quirk of his, a sacrifice that he has to bear. He could not fathom why he was having dreams now, and only of one particular person, of Jin.

His eyes closed and his head sank deep into his pillows. He smiled gently when he saw Jin’s shining face in front of him. Jin was saying something. What is it, Jin? Kame responded in his dreams. Instead, Jin just smiled his bright smile and opened his arms. Kame felt his heart soar as he ran into those arms. Jin held him so so tenderly. Kame nestled his face into Jin’s chest, savouring the feeling of being wanted for nothing but himself. There was no agenda to keep to, no commands to obey, no instructions to follow. It was just him being him, in Jin’s arms, and he felt free, something he was unfamiliar with, but getting to know and realizing that he yearned for it.

“Come away with me, Kame……” Was Jin’s persistent whispers, “come away with me…..”

“I want to Jin, I want to, be I can’t…..I can’t……I can’t……"

Jin’s smile was replaced with a look of pure sadness. Jin started to fade away, “Goodbye Kame…….’

“No…no, don’t go!!! JIN!” But it was no use. Kame was left, once again, standing alone in the dark.

***

Damn it! This was the worst time to be transported through time. Jin hated it when his powers transported him without him having any intention to go anywhere. The thought of Haru’s broken heart was still fresh in his mind, so was the revelation that Haru had forced upon him, that he loved, and was in love with, Kame. He needed time to process everything, he needed to wrap himself in the warm cocoon that was his bed. Instead, as he was walking along the long corridor towards his room, he was rudely transported.

Now, he was standing in a small, square room. There were no windows. The only source of light was a light tube flickering dimly from above. In the middle of the room was a steel table, where a man, a haggard, disheveled man, was sitting. Jin frowned at the sight. Why was he here? What significance did this have in his life? He did not remember any of this.

The man raised his head and looked directly at Jin. For a while, Jin stared back, thinking that the man was looking at the wall through him. There was something familiar about this man. Jin squinted, trying to place the face. He saw the man’s eyes focusing on his face as a smile curled on his lips. No, it couldn’t be. Nobody could ever see Jin in his time travels, nobody except that young boy he encountered outside his childhood home, but even then, Jin was not even sure if that boy actually did see him. Jin looked behind him to see if there was anything worthy of the man’s smile, but all Jin saw was a blank grey wall.

It was getting creepy. Jin squeezed his eyes, trying to transport himself away, but to no avail. He tried again, and again, but whenever he opened his eyes, he was still in front of this man that was staring so blatantly at him.

“Jin. You’re here.”

Jin almost jumped out of his skin. This man knew his name.

“Y..y…you know my name….” Jin managed.

“Yes. I do know you. You’ve grown into a fine young man. I’m glad I get to see you, my son.”

“F..f..father?” Jin’s eyes widened in recognition. This man was the same man he saw with his mother in the past scene that he witnessed.

“Ah.” The man acknowledged.

“W..what….why….how?”

“You time travelled, did you not?” The man gestured for Jin to take a seat opposite him at the table. Jin, like a robot, automatically obliged.

“How do you know what I can do?”

The man chuckled, “Well, for one thing, my son, Akanishi Jin, at this present time, is only 2 years old….”

Jin looked down, studying his hands, feeling suddenly shy. He had no memories of his father, and to be suddenly sitting in front of the man now, Jin felt overwhelmed and had no idea what to do.

“Also, my son, we have the same ability. We can travel through time, we can change the past, and see the future….”

“No, I can’t….” Jin muttered under his breath.

“Hmmm…?” the man raised an eyebrow in question to Jin’s statement.

“I said, I’m not like you, I can’t change anything. I can only travel to specific times in the past, and no one could ever see, and I could never change anything….I would have liked to, to have gotten food for mother, whenever I saw her so sick, and little me could not do anything to help…I….want to help….so much….but I can’t……” Jin felt his chest tighten as the man reached out a hand to hold his across table.

“Then why is it that you’re here now? Haven’t you always been able to do this?” the man asked, puzzled.

Jin shook his head in response.

“I see….” the man fell deep in thought.

The silence suddenly made Jin resentful of the man before him. Where did he go? Why wasn’t he there when his mother passed away? Where was he when little Jin was running for his life from the people that hunted him?

“Where were you, father? All my life, where were you?” Jin choked his question.

The man met Jin’s eyes, and in all earnestness, he said, “Today is the day I die.”

What? Jin could not believe his ears. His mother had refused to talk to him about his father. Whenever he asked her about him, all she would do was smile and get lost in her memories. But she never told him. He had convinced himself that his father must have abandoned them in the rundown apartment, but never dead.

“You’re dead?” Jin felt tears brimming.

“My time has come, to make way for you.” Jin’s father was a picture of calm.

“Why are you letting this happen? You said you can change the past. Go back now! Change something! Change something so that I can have my father!”

“I can’t. There is a force surrounding this room that blocks powers.”

“But I managed to get in….”

“You are not of this time, you are from the future. This power does not hold you here.”

“I’ve never been to the future….”

The elder Akanishi frowned. Jin looked at him, concerned. “What is it, father?” The man simply shook his head and gave his son a gentle smile.

“I have seen the future. You are going to save the world Jin. I have to die for you to save the world.”

Jin shook his head in disbelief, “No I’m not. I’m helpless. My powers are no good…I couldn’t even save Ka…erm…my friends….”

Akanishi senior suddenly looked serious, “Jin, there’s something blocking your power just like how this room is blocking mine. You are more powerful than you know. Find a way, believe in yourself, and your time will come."

Jin looked at his father with tears in his eyes.

“Your time will come, my son, believe me, I have seen it.”

“What’s going to happen, father? Tell me, tell me everything, tell me about you. Tell me.”

“Some other time, my son, when you find me again.” Jin’s father cast him a look of affection. Jin looked down at his hands, and saw that they were fading. No! Not now!

“Come,” his father stood up and beckoned Jin, “give your old man a hug.”

Jin did as he was told, hugging his father with all his might, even as he was fading gradually out of the room. “I love you, my son,” his father whispered in his ear as he disappeared, “and I am so proud of you.”

***

Kazuya.

Yes mother?

The winds are changing, it is almost time.

I know.

It’s no time falter, Kazuya.

I AM NOT FALTERING.

Where is Akanishi?

He’s…..

Don’t let him out of your sight Kazuya.

As you say, mother.

***

A loud bump made Kame sit up in bed. He was not asleep, having been disturbed out of it with his frequent, uncomfortable dreams. He did not trust himself to fall asleep again. Anyway, that short time of sleep was enough for him to function and maintain focus. Kame commanded the lights with a snap of his fingers, and as the glow flooded the room, he saw Jin, crouched with his back against his bedroom door.

“Jin?”

There was no response. Jin’s face was buried in his knees. Kame got out of bed and walked up to the crouching figure. He knelt down to touch Jin on the arm and felt Jin jolt at the contact. Jin raised his head, and Kame saw tears streaking down Jin’s cheeks.

“Kame?” Jin was stunned, he had been transported straight into Kame’s room. It was as though his body knew where he needed to be at the very moment.

“Yes, I’m here,” Kame said gently, “What are you doing in my room so late? Where did you go?”

“Nowhere, I didn’t go anywhere," Jin sobbed, trying to harness all the emotions that was swirling within him, from Haru, to his father, and now, from Kame’s close proximity that, despite his tears, was causing his heart to beat so hard that he could not breathe. Jin choked and gasped, trying to collect himself.

He knew that he should return to his room, but Jin could not bear to be alone at the moment. Too much had happened, and he needed comfort from the only one that could comfort him.

“Can I stay here tonight?” He choked his request, before burying his head in his knees again.

“Sure,” Kame responded, softly smiling as he ran his fingers through Jin’s hair. He wondered where Jin had been, but now was not the time to ask. Besides, Jin’s very presence brought peace to his troubled being. It was like all the pressure that has been building in him had dissipated, leaving him relaxed and contented. “Come, let’s go to bed, there’s more than enough space for the two of us.”

Jin let himself be helped up by Kame. The moment he stood up, however, he pulled Kame into a tight hug, pressing his face into Kame’s shoulder. His voice was muffled, barely audible, but Kame heard.

“I don’t want to be anywhere but here with you.”
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A/N: GAH! It's getting difficult....but I will press on! Thanks for reading!

[Fan Fic] Love Language

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 05:06:19 GMT

Title: Love Language

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame

Genre: Romance

Rating: PG

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: Kame and Jin speak the language of love.

A/N: Was bored at work, and inspiration pinged in my head. It's not very well done, but I thought I'd just share it. The world needs a little akame sweetness amidst all the angst. I warn you, this is going to be SAPPY!!
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Kame doesn’t say “I love you”.

Instead, he drives the long drive to Yokohama and stands in the shadows, away from the prying eyes of fans and paparazzi, watching Jin act on a make-shift stage set up specifically for the shoot. Sometimes, he stands outside of the studios, peering in, because his mere presence on the set will cause pandemonium. His face freezes, his limbs grow stiff from the cold that winter winds bring, and yet, he watches. He silently cheers whenever Jin nails the scene with one take. He grins as he sees Jin habitually scratch the back of his head, bow and apologize profusely whenever he screws up and has to redo the scene.

He thinks that Jin looks extremely hot as a leader of a rock band. He has to bite his lower lip sometimes to curb the impulse to run out of his hiding place to engage Jin in a mind-numbing kiss. He smiles as he recalls all the mind-numbing kisses they have shared.

When he sees that filming was almost done for the day, he whips out his mobile and types a swift email before leaving to sit in a Chinese restaurant nearby, careful to have his cap and sunglasses on. He waits another hour or so before Jin breezes in. He lifts his head and beams at Jin as Jin approaches. Jin still looks hot, even if he’s in his street clothes covered by a thick fur-lined coat.

Jin slips into the seat opposite him, emitting an exhausted sigh. He wants to cup Jin’s face in his hands to relieve some of Jin’s tiredness, but he can’t. So he pushes a cup of hot tea in front of Jin, and watches how Jin’s cheeks turns slightly pink from the warmth as he drinks it.

“How long have you been here?” Jin asks gently.

“Not long,” he replies as he reaches for the menu.

***

Jin doesn’t say “I love you”.

Instead, he takes the Shinkansen from Tokyo to Osaka, despite him being wiped out from his own activities for the day. He arrives at the hotel late in the evening. He argues with the reception staff when they refuse to give him a key. He groans in resignation as he settles himself into a couch in the hotel lobby. He looks at his watch. Dreamboys was mid-way through. He crosses his arms across his chest as he waits. Typically, he falls asleep, and hotel guests leave him alone because his disguise of ratty casual clothes, hat and sunglasses makes him look more like a street bum then an idol.

He wakes up, grumbling as he stretches himself out. He glances at the time and scrambles to his feet. He makes his way up to Kame’s room. He presses his ear to the door and he hears the blow dryer. He grins as he anticipates Kame in a towel. He knocks. He jumps slightly when he sees Kame’s face covered in a sheet mask. He recovers and pecks the lips that are exposed by the cut-out in the sheet. He chuckles when he sees Kame try not to smile back.

The room is small, enough for one person, but a slight squeeze for two. That does not bother him as he flops on the bed. He engages Kame in conversation as Kame busies himself with his night time beauty regime. He tells Kame about his day, and listens as Kame talks about what happened backstage between Tegoshi and the Juniors. He nods and laughs at appropriate moments.

Kame finally comes to bed, and he snuggles up to Kame. Kame falls right to sleep. He stays awake a little longer just to listen to Kame’s breathing. He pulls Kame to him and closes his eyes.

In the early morning, he leaves for Tokyo again because he has a full schedule. He promises Kame who looks very cute with his bed hair that he will make another trip to Osaka in a couple of days.

***

Kame doesn’t say “I love you”.

Instead, he musters all the understanding within him to say that he is ok with Jin posing naked with an equally naked girl for a magazine. He is happy that Jin cared enough to ask. He knows that he is Jin’s support, and he tries to be the best one he can.

He cooks the low carb, high protein food that Jin requests for, and eats with Jin, even though most times, he sneaks a big bowl of katsudon if Jin doesn’t stay the night. He indulges Jin by telling him that the gym sessions were making a difference, even though he secretly smiles at the fact that Jin can never really get rid of that last bit of tummy. He likes that tummy, it is one of his favourite Jin parts.

On the day of the shoot, he cannot help wringing his hands in nervousness throughout the day. He wonders if Jin was enjoying himself, and whether Jin was enjoying himself too much. But he trusts Jin, so he waits for the phone call, which comes sometime in the afternoon. His heart warms when he hears Jin’s voice telling him that he can’t wait to be in his arms tonight.

The magazine is out in the stands. He sees one on a chair in the corner of the dressing room. He picks it up and flips through it, swallowing hard as he attempts to digest the images in front of him. Jin has done it, and legions of fans will be worshipping these pictures for a long time. He fights the urge to tear the pages because he feels that Jin naked is for his eyes only. Contrarily, he walks up to Jin, leans close and whispers, “I am proud of you.”

***

Jin doesn’t say “I love you”.

Instead, he bears with it when he sees Kame wrap his arms around Koki. He sometimes wishes that Kame would be less popular, so that the company would care less about Kame, so that he can have Kame all to himself. But, he sees the shine in Kame’s eyes whenever Kame does well at work, he witnesses Kame coming out of his shell to be the colourful, flamboyant person that he has come to be very fond of. He does not have the heart to be angry. He is aware that it is all an act in front of the cameras, so he grits his teeth and tolerates it.

Still, it bothers him how slutty Kame can appear to the public. When Kame tells him of his idea for his solo performance for the record-breaking concert, it took all he had to control his outburst. No one should see Kame like that, no one but him. He knows that Kame would change the idea if he objects, but he does not want to stifle Kame. So, he helps Kame with the choreography and the costumes. He even deliberately mutes his own solo performance to give Kame more limelight.

Every night, when Kame performs, he watches Kame on the monitors backstage as he changes his costume. It confuses him how he can be jealous and proud at the same time. His heart always skips a beat when Kame enters the changing room after his performance with the lipstick smear on his lips. He wants to drag Kame to the nearest empty space and do things to him. But he doesn’t. He gets ready for the next set, and as he walks past Kame, he mutters softly, “Well done.”

***

Kame doesn’t say “I love you”.

Instead, he puts “Helpless Night” on repeat on his ipod. He listens to it all the time, during breaks between filming, between rehearsals. He has always thought that Jin has a beautiful voice. Jin’s voice soothes him. He casts his mind back to the days where it was ok for him to sing with Jin, when they were a duet. He shrugs, thinking how things had changed. Jin was in a duet with someone else now. But it doesn’t faze him – being together in public meant that they could not be together in private. This arrangement he has with Jin now, although not perfect, is good for the moment.

He sits in front of his computer at home, looking up his schedule on the company’s Intranet and wondering if Jin would come by, it was getting late. He checks his email, and he sees that Jin had sent him the top secret demo recordings of the songs from Jin’s new movie. He laughs a little as he reads Jin’s message to delete immediately after download. He clicks to download them, careful to label them nondescriptly so that nobody else would know what the songs are.

The songs permeate through his apartment from his ipod dock speakers. He lies on his bed as he listens to them on loop, letting Jin’s angelic voice lull him to sleep.

***

Jin doesn’t say “I love you”.

Instead, he forces himself to watch every single episode of Kame’s new drama about wine. He spaces out during the boring bits, but sits up and glues his eyes to the screen whenever Kame appears. He has watched every single one of Kame’s dramas, even though he cringes whenever Kame had to be intimate with the leading lady. If he can’t watch it on TV for whatever reason, he remembers to record it, or inconveniences Yamapi to help him.

He knows that Kame does not expect him to watch everything, but he wants to. In fact, he has already booked his advanced tickets to watch Gokusen The Movie. He cannot attend the premiere, but he makes sure he watches it within the week of its opening. He wonders if Kame and he can ever walk down the red carpet together, as each other’s date. He will really like that.

The lock of his front door jiggles as the end credits of the drama roll. He leaps to the door and surprises Kame with a hug as Kame comes in. He likes it when Kame laughs unrestrictedly. He laughs along and picks Kame up to swirl him around. Kame kicks to be put down because Kame refuses to be treated like a girl. He protests and tells Kame that Kame’s the only one he treats this way.

Kame’s chuckles die down, a slight frown replaces Kame’s smile as he lays his eyes on the TV, “You were watching that? Isn't it boring as hell?”

“You’re in it,” he replies, “and anything that features you is good.” His heart pounds as he sees Kame notice his double meaning. He follows Kame into his bedroom, guided by Kame’s beckoning eyes.

***

They don’t say “I love you.”

Instead, they touch each other in ways that only each other can understand. They give hugs that convey support. Their kisses are lined with trust. And when they come together, it is the coming together of two bodies, two hearts, two souls, willing to become one.

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 13

Thu, 15 Oct 2009 01:00:16 GMT

Title: Fragments

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame, Kokame

Genre: Angst, Romance, Smut

Rating: NC-17 (As there will be smut in subsequent chapters)

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: In life and love, you can’t have everything that you want, or can you?

A/N: This is my first multi-chaptered fic. I don’t know how long this will be yet. I’ll see how it goes as I write. This story is set in the near past, but will go back to the further past and play around with the timeline quite a bit, and it might get a little messy. I’ll try to be as faithful to the timeline as possible, but my memory might not serve me well, and I might just change things a bit and add a few imaginary dates, using my creative license.
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Chapter 13

Late October 2005, in the KAT-TUN dressing room, NHK theatre

“Guys, could you hang around for a while? I…er…have s..something I to tell you…."

They had just finished another run-of-the-mill Shounen Club recording and were gathering their things to leave for home. It was like clockwork to them. Gone were the days when the 6 of them would huddle together nervously just seconds before the show began, shelving aside whatever arguments that had happened moments before, overtaken by the overwhelming thought of performing in front of so many people. Now, Shounen Club was like talking to an annoying relative or distant family member. The boys did not quite like to participate in it, but they could not get out of it, not when they were still Juniors anyway.

There had been buzz around JE about KAT-TUN’s debut. The talks had been around for years, every time KAT-TUN performed a new song written especially for them on Shounen Club instead of singing their senpais’ songs, during the time when they held their own concerts in front of legions of fans, when their peers NEWS, and then Kanjani 8, debuted despite being plagued with scandal that made the KAT-TUN members’ behaviours seem exemplary. KAT-TUN was always told that it would be soon. But the word “soon” was so cryptic. When exactly would that be? Was there some publicity timeline that the company had to adhere to? Was there really some internal struggle, favouritism among the high-ups that caused the boys to be ping-ponged around? Or was it sadism on Johnny’s part, to have the rumours leak but doing nothing about it? Whatever it was, it caused the KAT-TUN boys to often be angsty, losing hope that they would indeed debut and rise in ranks in the JE hierarchy.

It was in this atmosphere that the youngest member of the group prepared himself to make his announcement. Koki settled himself down between Jin and Maru at the table and waited in anticipation to what Kame was about to say. He observed Kame, pacing up and down, trying to muster up the words.

“Kame….if you have something to say, just say it,” Koki tried to make things easier. He acknowledged Kame’s grateful smile with a nod and a wink.

Taking a deep breath, Kame said, “I’m releasing a single…….”

He said it so softly that Taguchi misheard, “We’re releasing a single! WOW! The boss is finally ready for us to debut?!”

Jin, having actually heard Kame accurately, snapped, “Shut up Taguchi! Kame, what do you mean you’re releasing a single?”

“Without us?” Maru looked distressed. Ueda just glared, while Taguchi threw Kame a confused look.

Nodding, Kame gulped. Koki, although feeling a little resentment rise in him, could not help but feel sorry for his friend as well.

“Kame, what do you mean?” Jin asked again through gritted teeth.

“I…I….we….” Kame swallowed, “Nobuta is doing well, and Manager-san said that Johnny-san wants Yamapi and I to release the theme song as a single………”

“So you’re going to do this? Are you going to be a NEWS now?!” Ueda’s voice cracked in rage.

“NO…NO, never,” Kame shook his head, “It’s just a temporary unit for the song. It doesn’t mean anything…..I would rather not….but the boss said so…..”

“Great, this is just great….you’re the star Kame, good on you,” Koki’s stomach knotted at Ueda’s sarcasm. He knew that everyone was reacting like that due to frustration. They all knew that it was not Kame’s fault, but they could not help channel their anger at him.

“I…I..tried to turn it down, guys, I really did….I want to debut with KAT-TUN…..not like this….”

“Kame, the boss obviously sees potential in you more than in any of us,” Maru shrugged and sighed, “well, congratulations. Even if KAT-TUN never debuts, at least one of us will have.” Maru stood up and left the room. Ueda followed immediately after, not looking at Kame once. Taguchi hesitated, but got up as well. He sighed heavily and patted Kame on the shoulder before making his exit.

It was Kame, Jin and Koki now. Kame looked at both Koki and Jin, searching for understanding in their eyes. He cringed when he was met with Jin’s cold look instead.

“J..Jin….please…..it’s not what I want….”

“With Yamapi huh? So Johnny-san has decided for you to ditch me and pair you up with Yamapi instead….”

“It’s because of the drama, it doesn’t mean anything….”

“Our pairing was because of the drama too! So that doesn’t mean anything as well?” Jin voice was getting louder.

“No….Jin, please understand…..”

“Oh, I understand alright. I understand that you’re whoring yourself in this industry, climbing over all of our heads to get to the top. And I suppose we have to act all happy for you on national TV and all that…….GOD! I don’t know why we, why I try so hard! KAT-TUN is never going to debut, not with such a selfish member like you!”

Kame did not know what else to say. He lowered his eyes in reaction to Jin’s fierce glare. Koki looked from one to the other, deciding whether to interfere. He was upset as well, but not nearly as upset as Jin was at the moment. Besides, seeing Kame so distraught hurt his heart. Before he could do anything however, Jin smacked his fist into the table.

“I don’t want to do this anymore! What’s the point? I could have been a normal kid, hanging out with my normal friends, playing soccer to my heart’s content, instead of coming in here week after week, smiling forcedly at the cameras, and pretending to be friends with you guys who are nothing but self-centred, insensitive pricks!"

All the rebellious resentment Jin had for the industry was bubbling up to the surface. Kame and Koki remained silent, the former taking it all in, thinking that he deserved to be yelled at. Koki, on the other hand was trying to figure out why Jin was so unnaturally pissed off. Yes, Kame’s news did rock the boat a little, but it was what this industry was all about, it was something they were all used to. When they signed the contract all those years ago, they knew full well that their lives, both personal and professional, were no longer their own. Their lives were under the control of JE. Koki wondered if there was more than meets the eye.

“Mark my words, Kamenashi,” Jin warned as he stood up and headed to the door, “one day, when you least expect it, I’m going to abandon this whole circus, leaving you all alone. Who’s going to be your friend then? Huh? Oh wait, I forgot, there’s always Yamashita.” Chuckling bitterly, Jin walked out.

Seeing Kame slump down to crouch pitifully on a corner, Koki got up and crouched next to Kame.

“Koki?” Kame muttered weakly, having no energy left.

“Yes, Kame?”

“Why aren’t you mad at me?”

Koki gave Kame a soft smile, “I’m mad, but not at you. I know it’s not your fault. The management should not put us through this, really, KAT-TUN is unstable enough as it is….”

“We’re not unstable, I believe in us,” Kame protested despite what he had been subjected to.

“Then why are you looking so defeated? You know that the guys just need some time to wrap their heads around this.”

Kame did not really hear what Koki had said. “Am I really like what Jin said? Am I really selfish?”

It was always about Jin. “Kame….Jin’s just frustrated. You kinda overtook him as the golden boy you know? And he’s bound to feel a little jealous, it’s natural.”

“But I didn’t mean to do it…I didn’t…..”

“Sshhh….I know…” Koki reached out to hug Kame’s shoulder and pulled him into a hug.

“I would have thought he would understand…I thought we were friends….”

“He is your friend, just as much as you are his. You guys will be fine, you’ll see….” Koki managed a grin.

Kame looked hopeful and was waiting to hear more.

However much it hurt him, Koki nodded, “Believe in your bond with Jin, Kame. Nothing will pull you guys apart, absolutely nothing.” Koki tried to say it with as much conviction as he could.

It was only then that Kame relaxed and smiled, “Koki, what would I do without you?”

***

April 1st 2008 – Filming of Cartoon KAT-TUN Do-As-You-Please Spring Special

“Kame-chan, are you alright?” It was something that Koki wanted to ask again, but he held his tongue. He had asked enough of that the past month, each time receiving the answer, “I’m fine, perfectly fine,” and if they were not in a public place or rushing for another photography/recording session, after replying, Kame would initiate sex. Not that Koki was complaining. Making love to Kame was the best thing in the world. It was Kame’s attitude towards making love that bothered Koki. There was something different. Kame’s moves were more anxious, like he was trying to bury himself in sex, so that it will prevent him from thinking about anything else.

But then, whenever they were around people, particularly with the rest of KAT-TUN, Kame would not come close to Koki, but even then it was very subtle. If Koki was not so attuned to Kame’s body language, he would not have noticed it. Kame had always maintained that they had to be professional at work, and Koki understood that. Even so, there had been times when Kame let his guard down and acted like his boyfriend, with affectionate touches here and there, even in front of the other guys. Recently, however, Koki noticed that these touches had disappeared.

He wondered what was wrong. Ever since that night when he woke up shaking in Kame’s arms, Kame had been holding on to him so tightly behind closed doors, and yet pushing him away in public. Koki also noticed that Kame and Jin were not on talking terms once again, but Koki could not be too bothered about that now. Frankly, he was sick and tired of fixing things between Kame and Jin; he had done so many times in the past, to the detriment of his own heart. Also, at this very moment, he had to fix things between him and Kame, even though he was not sure if there was anything to fix in the first place.

Kame was driving them to the filming location for the day. It was rare that they have been paired up and split into 3 different locations. Koki was grateful that Kame was paired with him. Maybe going out together, even if in front of the camera crew, would do them good. Seeing something else besides the inside of a studio might just be the thing Kame needed to snap out of whatever that was bothering him.

“This is nice isn’t it?” Koki asked, breaking the silence.

“Hmmm? Mmmm…” Kame replied, distracted.

“What do you think the producers will make us do today?”

Silence.

“Kame? I’m talking to you….Kame-chan?”

“Oh, you said something?” Kame pulled the car up to a red light.

“I’ve been trying to talk to you this whole ride! What the hell is wrong with you today, and for the past month?!” Koki snapped. He did not know how else to get through to his boyfriend.

“Nothing. Nothing’s wrong….just planning for the concert is taking its toll, that’s all,” Kame stared straight ahead, not meeting Koki’s eye.

“You fought with Jin again didn’t you?” Koki was almost afraid to ask.

“What? No! Why do you think that? I have nothing to fight with Jin about, we are hardly talking!” Kame responded, probably a little too quickly but Koki did not notice.

“What am I supposed to think? You get like this whenever it’s something involving Jin, I’ve been there in the past, remember? What changed between you 2? Why can’t you just get along? Would it kill you to be civil to each other?”

The light turned green and Kame moved forward, “It’s not about Jin ok, just drop it.”

“What is it, Kame? You know you can tell me anything, right?” Koki had concern in his voice.

“I know, sweetie, it’s just…just something I have to figure out for myself. When the time comes, I’ll tell you, I promise,” Kame lied.

“You sure?"

“Yes,” Kame turned and smiled at Koki before turning his eyes to the road again, “What say we enjoy our time together today? We haven’t done this in a long while.”

Still slightly unconvinced but deciding to trust Kame, Koki nodded and squeezed Kame’s hand that was on the gear shift, and felt a little better when his squeeze was reciprocated.

***

Admittedly, Kame had been distracted the past month. He was unsure of himself, and he was confused most of the time. He hated it, hated not being in control. He liked having the upper hand on things, he liked knowing what to do, both in his professional and personal life. So, that, for want of a better word, tryst he had with Jin was driving him crazy. He had absolutely no clue what to make of the situation. Whenever he was alone, all he could think about was Jin’s soft warm lips on his, but when he was Koki, he would be overcome with guilt which manifested in the desire to make Koki feel wanted and needed. Being in the same room with KAT-TUN was another matter. He would avoid Jin’s attempts to make eye contact, but he would feel uncomfortable behaving like a boyfriend to Koki in front of Jin. He knew that his behavior was akin to that of a lunatic’s in the past month, and he just wanted everything to go away, to go back to the way things were.

But how far in history should he go back to? To the Junior days? To that fateful day in the playground? To the day he let Koki make love to him? Would he have done anything differently? He really felt like he was going mad.

It did not help that Jin had sent him an infuriating email a couple days after the incident: You know how I feel. Do you know how you feel? The ball is in your court.

Kame had stared at the email for days, silently throwing curses at a certain Akanishi Jin, but also struggling with something he knew he had to do. It all boiled down to him choosing. He was being forced to make a choice, but how could he choose?

Even now, as he was driving Koki and himself to the filming location, his mind was all in a muddle. He turned to look at Koki fleetingly while he drove, remembering the happiness in Koki’s eyes when manager-san announced that they were both paired up for this shoot. Kame’s heart had warmed with affection for his boyfriend, and he looked forward to spending some leisure time together too. And then, he recalled Jin’s eyes across the meeting room table. Jin was saying something about how he was glad that it was finally not Nakamaru that he was paired with, and it made everyone at the table laugh. Kame had joined in. Through the laughter, he had caught Jin’s eyes, and it was full of question, full of expectation of an answer.

A whole 5 hours of their own time. In front of the cameras for all to see of course. But, things would get edited, so some private moments were allowed. It was better than nothing. Kame felt comforted as Koki held his hand for a couple of seconds before the cameras started to roll.

Oh God! Why did Koki bring up LA? Kame guessed that on some subconscious level, Koki was still feeling insecure about their relationship. The hint of sadness in Koki’s tone of voice that only Kame could detect caused Kame’s emotions to swirl. One the one hand, he was brought back to how he felt when Jin announced that he was leaving, on the other, he felt sad that after all this time, Koki still had the right to be insecure. Who could blame him? Koki’s insecurity would be proven right if he was swimming in Kame’s thoughts at that very moment. Once again, Kame was experiencing failure, failure in his relationship with Koki. To make himself and Koki feel better, Kame suggested going near Chiba, Koki’s home town. His mood brightened when he saw the huge smile on Koki’s face. Kame had done something right.

Maybe he should call it a day with Koki. There was no point stringing Koki along. That was what Kame thought throughout the cab ride, even when he was pretending to sleep. But when he opened his eyes and glanced at his sleeping lover, Kame could not bring himself to let go.

His heart did flutter when he was with Koki, and it was evident during this trip to Chiba. He noticed how Koki cared for him so tenderly. At the rest stop on their way to their destination, Koki had hugged him, held his hand, made him laugh and tried so hard to take his mind off whatever that was bothering him even though Koki had no idea what it was. Koki even rang the bell and declared “I love you” for the millionth time when Kame had not even said it once. Koki said it to the ocean, hoping that the waves would carry those words to Kame. And even though Kame was touched and made a joke to lighten the mood, when Koki handed Kame the rope to the bell, as he rang it, he could not say those words, at least not to the man standing beside him. Who could he say those words to then? No, not even to Jin. There were too many unresolved issues between him and Jin. There he was, thinking about Jin again, even as the bell resounded towards the vast blueness of the sea. And when Koki stroked the small of his back, signaling that they should move along, the lump of “I love you” was still in his throat.

The more time Kame spent with Koki that day, the more Kame was sure. And when they were on the cable car going up the mountain, when Koki said those words, “It is good that Kame-chan is happy…” as though it was the only thing that mattered in Koki’s world, Kame smiled genuinely at his boyfriend for the first time in almost a month.

Kame and Koki spent a beautiful day together, and Kame had made his decision. The game was over, or so he thought, and Koki was not to know anything about it.
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A/N: Man! This was a tough chapter to write. I hope I didn't confuse you guys. I'm just trying to contrast Koki with Jin, and also to show that Kame does not have it easy. Ah well...... :p

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 12

Wed, 30 Sep 2009 07:03:35 GMT

Title: Fragments

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame, Kokame

Genre: Angst, Romance, Smut

Rating: NC-17 (As there will be smut in subsequent chapters)

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: In life and love, you can’t have everything that you want, or can you?

Chapter 12

Mid February 2008, Hokkaido

“We hardly spend time together, you and I,” observed Maru on the evening flight from Tokyo to Hokkaido.

“What do you mean? I seem to always get stuck with you for these silly Cartoon KAT-TUN special episode things,” Jin replied, sticking his earphones into his ears.

“Yes, but that’s hardly enough,” Maru reasoned, “I haven’t had a decent conversation with you since you got back.”

“Yeah, this is kinda nice, getting away from Tokyo, even if it’s with you,” Jin responded in slight jest.

“It would be nicer if we were going to a warmer place, rather than arctic Hokkaido,” Maru was never one to give up the chance to whine and complain.

Jin simply grinned and looked out the window, watching as the Tokyo lights grew smaller and smaller, until they were covered by the clouds.

“I know we have an early morning schedule, but how about going to the hotel’s onsen once we check in?” Maru asked.

“You’re not going to embarrass me by covering up your bits right?” Jin could not help but chuckle.

Maru felt that that sentence was ironic on at least a couple of levels, “I do not cover up my bits, you guys exaggerate, and I still can’t believe you guys brought it up on national TV. Seriously. Can’t a guy practice a little bit of non-exhibitionistic behavior without being ridiculed?”

“Admit it, it was funny, still is,” Jin’s laughter reached its trademark high pitch.

“Shut up. Onsen or not?”

“Sure,” Jin shrugged his consent before falling asleep to the lull of the plane’s engine.

***

Jin relaxed in the steaming hot water, feeling his limbs loosen. He looked out of the adjacent window and admired the night of Hokkaido’s countryside. Even though Jin was a city boy through and through, the country, in small doses, touched him. He sighed and soaked deeper into the water.

Where was Maru? Probably thinking of how best to come to the bath without exposing too much of himself, Jin deduced as he shook his head. Jin had made a detour to the quaint hotel’s gift shop before coming to the onsen, and yet he was earlier than his friend. The reason for Jin’s detour was that he spotted a yukata with a unique print and decided to buy it. Kame’s birthday was coming up. Jin knew that he might not be able to give it to Kame, given their extremely strained relationship right now, but it was a habit that Jin had, and he did not particularly want to get rid of it. He would be content buying birthday presents for Kame every year and see them stack up in his own drawer.

“Penny for your thoughts,” Maru was finally lowering himself into the water.

Jin smirked and eyed Maru with mock lasciviousness. He laughed out loud at Maru’s unintentional but obvious blush, earning a thwack from Maru’s wet towel.

“This is really nice,” Maru said after they had settled down to enjoy each other’s company. It was very late and they were the only ones in their section of the onsen.

“Yes it is,” Jin agreed. For all his obsession with American and European culture, Jin had to admit that no one does simple luxuries and comfort like the Japanese.

“What I actually really mean is that it’s nice to see you smile and hear you laugh. I feel like I haven’t heard it in years,” Maru was being honest.

“I do laugh and smile, you’re just not there most of the time to see it,” Jin joked, hoping to change the subject.

“Doing so for the cameras or when imbibed with substances such as alcohol and the likes is not real, Jin,” Maru chided as he splashed some water on his chest.

Jin remained silent. He turned his head once again to look out towards the night sky. He wondered when did the word “personal” begin to mean “public” with everyone poking their nose into it. He chuckled slightly when he thought of the word “nose” in relation to his companion sitting next to him on the stony ledge in the water.

“I’m glad you’re relaxing here. God knows you need it,” Maru smiled, happy that he could do something for his bandmate and friend.

“Mmmmmmm…..” Jin tilted his head back and inhaled the warm air. He felt his lungs expand and he let the soothing sensation wash over him. It was a rare occurrence, Jin’s mind was blissfully blank, and he savoured it while he could. He felt his head get lighter and he fell into a pleasant semi-consciousness. He let his thoughts drift effortlessly and meaninglessly, thinking of only good things. Inevitably, his thoughts settled on vanilla smooth skin, on the familiar smell of crisp cologne, on shining caramel eyes, on soft pillowy lips.

Forgetting where he was, he gave a soft moan as he melted from the heat of the water and what he was experiencing in his mind. He ran his hands languidly over his chest, his abdomen, his inner thighs, causing gentle ripples in the water, even as he unknowingly whispered, “Kazuya…” In his dreamlike state, he felt his cock twitch, and automatically, his hand reached out for it……

“AHEM!”

Jin’s eyes sprung open at the sudden alien sound. Gradually realizing what had happened, he panicked slightly before he turned reluctantly to the man beside him. Maru had his eyes closed, pretending not to have noticed anything, although he could not help but hold a smug expression on his face. Jin sat still, embarrassed. The awkwardness of the situation was uncomfortable, but Jin could not leave the onsen, not yet, as there was something else causing him more discomfort underwater, and he had to wait for it to ebb.

It was a long while before Jin felt secure enough to get out of the water. He looked at Maru again, they had been quiet, and he saw that his friend was sleeping. Relieved, Jin started hoisting himself up.

“Be careful, Jin,” Maru suddenly spoke without opening his eyes, causing Jin to miss his footing in surprise and slip back in with a splash. Jin had wanted to throw Maru a scornful look, but when Maru opened his eyes, Jin saw concern in them, and he caught the double meaning in Maru’s words. Jin sighed, feeling that he had been sighing a lot recently.

“I’m trying,” Jin muttered.

“He’s somebody else’s now, and it’s not just some prick we don’t know. He’s with our good friend.”

“I know. God, don’t you think I know?”

Maru nodded. There was more to say, but it was not his place to say it. Jin, and perhaps Kame, had to be sensible and work it out for themselves. He just did not want to see Koki hurt and he wanted Jin to know that.

“Just…..be careful, Jin,” it was all Maru could say.

They acknowledged each other in the serious and profound moment, until Maru broke the heaviness by saying, “Err…Jin, you were in the midst of getting up right? Why don’t you leave first?”

“Why don’t we leave together? It’s late, and we have a full day of stupidity ahead of us.”

“I kinda want to soak a little while longer,” Maru insisted.

Jin looked at Maru in puzzlement before it dawned on him. He could not help but break out into boisterous laughter again. It was his turn to thwack Maru with his towel before getting up, leaving Maru all by his lonesome, chuckling as he did so.

***

Early March 2008, sound recording for Don’t You Ever Stop

“Stop it Jin, just stop….”

Jin felt urgent lips press against his once again. He raised his hand to cup Kame’s face as he returned the kiss, urging Kame’s tongue to invade and explore. His palms felt the silky smoothness of Kame’s cheeks, and his fingers caressed the soft flesh at the back of Kame’s ears. He barely heard what Kame was murmuring into the kiss.

“Stop it, stop…..Jin……stop……”

Pulling himself to stand up off the locker room bench, lips never detaching, and with hands unwilling to leave their mould of Kame’s face, Jin moved them forward until Kame was against the wall. It was only then that he allowed his lips to leave Kame’s to travel down Kame’s jaw line, Kame’s neck. Jin kissed each spot gently, getting intoxicated by Kame’s sweet honey scent that permeated out through his silken skin.

Kame had been kissing him fervently, heatedly, and now, as he was stamping Kame’s neck with fluttery kisses, he felt Kame’s hands stroking his back, long slow strokes, as though feeling the sinews of his muscles, the bones of his spine. Jin shivered at the sensation and he let himself get lost in Kame’s touches.

“Kazuya…..” he muttered between kisses, “Kazuya……”

“Jin…..” Kame whispered, before he moaned when he felt Jin’s hand move from his cheek, down his neck and onto his chest to brush his nipple through his shirt. “What are we doing, Jin,” Kame breathed, “What are we doing?”

“I don’t know…but…oh god….you taste so damn good…..” Jin said as he brought himself up to kiss Kame on the lips again. He felt Kame melt more in his arms, and Jin kissed and kissed the object of his desire, tasting him, getting drunk on him.

“Hhhnnn….J…jin…we…should….sss…ttt…OH GOD!” Jin had moved his lips to Kame’s ears and had started nibbling on them.

“Kazuya….I want to taste every bit of you….” Jin mumbled, blowing wispy breaths into Kame’s ears, causing Kame to shudder and grip more tightly onto Jin. Jin knelt down and lifted Kame’s shirt, revealing his creamy abdomen. He nuzzled his face into it, and continued his quest. Kame leaned his head back onto the wall, and sighed, fingers stroking and curling through Jin’s hair. Jin’s hands reached up to tease his nipples under his shirt and Kame groaned at the contact.

His kisses were getting lower and lower, until his lips hit the waistband of Kame’s black jeans. The denim was thick, but Jin could see, he could feel, Kame’s arousal that mirrored his. Jin moved his hand to the belt buckle and Kame gasped, and squeezed his eyes shut.

“Don’t….Jin….please….don’t…..” But his pleas fell on deaf ears. Jin fumbled with the buckle. Even in his lust-filled mind, he knew that Kame would forcefully try to stop him if he wanted to, and not use only words. Kame wanted this as much as he did, he told himself.

The buckle was unfastened, the button was undone, and Jin began to unzip the zipper while Kame very slightly, very very slightly thrusted his hips forward.

“Jin…..”

The way Kame moaned his name sent a spiral of fire into the pit of his stomach. He buried his face into Kame’s tummy again as his fingers worked the zip. He kissed and licked Kame’s pleasure trail that led and disappeared into the white band of his boxers. Jin was getting drunk, so drunk that it took him a while to notice that Kame was pushing him away. Kame’s hands were on his head, it they were trying to move him off.

What the…..? Jin heard the sound of a mobile phone ringing. He got back on his feet and backed away as he watched Kame fish for his phone in his jeans pocket. Jin gulped to see the unbuckled portion, exposing Kame’s boxers.

Kame glanced at the caller ID, a look of guilt and worry flashed across his face, and Jin knew immediately who it was. And it was only then that he snapped out of his reverie, it was then that he remembered the words, be careful Jin. Kame flicked his phone open and Jin sat back down on the bench. Kame accepted the call and put it to his ear, and Jin buried his face in his hands.

“Koki….yes, I’m still here. I’ll see you at home.”

A good 15 minutes had passed before Jin released his face, but he knew, he knew even before he looked. Kame was gone.

***

Kame studied his lover’s sleeping face. Kame had returned home to find that Koki had fallen asleep on the couch waiting for him. The drive home was one of the most dangerous drives Kame had ever experienced. He could not keep his focus on the roads, his mind kept drifting back to what had happened, and his entire being was a big knot of confusion. He felt pleasure, he felt pain. He felt relief, he felt guilt. He felt like he was torn into two. He did not know how he managed to make it back, but he was thankful that he did.

Looking at Koki now, so peaceful, oblivious to what had happened, made Kame’s heart ache. He leaned in and laid a gentle kiss on Koki’s lips, feeling the bristles that he had grown so used to. Kame cringed. The taste was wrong. He had Jin’s taste in his mouth, and it was wrong. Just wrong.

Wrong was something Kame did not want to feel. He had spent all his life striving for perfection, doing what was right, doing what was responsible. He needed to do the responsible now, he had made his choice with Koki.

But.

This was Jin. Akanishi Jin. The boy that held a part of Kame’s heart, a part that Kame needed to feel whole. Kame did not want to admit it, to admit that he needed Jin. In Kame’s mind, it was a matter of whether he wanted Jin, and in what way did he want him. Kame could not deny that what happened in the locker room affected him. He knew that his body responded, and it felt oh so good. There was something there that he could never feel with Koki. Was it enough though, for Kame to make a decision that will hurt someone who loved him so much?

He saw a clear and bright path with Koki, but with Jin, it was dark and foggy. And yet...Jin.... Jin, who made him feel on top of the world and plunged him into the depths of hell at the same time. Kame shook his head to clear it. Something has to be done, but he did not know what.

“Kame….Kame-chan….” Koki was talking in his sleep. Kame turned and held Koki’s hand in his, watching Koki’s face twitch in reaction to his dream.

“Kame…..don’t go…..don’t go…….” Kame’s eyes widened as he saw a glistening tear stream down Koki’s face. A sharp pain gripped him as he kissed the tear away.

“Koki, sweetie, you’re dreaming….” He roused Koki out of his sleep. He watched as Koki opened his eyes, disoriented and fearful at first, but slowly realizing that it was a dream. Koki sat up and gave Kame a big hug.

“Kame…”

“Sshh…I know. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.” Kame hoped that the words that he uttered were something he felt from the bottom of his heart.

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A/N: I put something a little lighter in front just to ease the mood. It's not going to be an easy web to untangle, for Kame, for Jin, for Koki, and for me writing them :p

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 11

Mon, 14 Sep 2009 11:42:53 GMT

Title: Fragments

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame, Kokame

Genre: Angst, Romance, Smut

Rating: NC-17 (As there will be smut in subsequent chapters)

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: In life and love, you can’t have everything that you want, or can you?

A/N: This is my first multi-chaptered fic. I don’t know how long this will be yet. I’ll see how it goes as I write. This story is set in the near future, but will go back to the past and play around with the timeline quite a bit, and it might get a little messy. I’ll try to be as faithful to the timeline as possible, but my memory might not serve me well, and I might just change things a bit and add a few imaginary dates, using my creative license.
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Chapter 11

Early November 2007, on the set of Yukan Club

Jin, Taguchi and Yokoyama Yu retired to their boys’ trailer after they had shot their action sequence. It was now the girls’ turn and the boys could not be stuffed to hang around the set. They were each individually tired from their Johnnys’ activities. Jin was glad that the two were in this drama series with him. For Johnny’s iron fist where work was concerned, the old man was unexpectedly sensitive enough to know that Jin, no matter how cocky and self-confident he was, would not be able to get into the groove of drama filming, particularly after a 2-year absence, on his own. How the production house and TV station could afford three Johnnys’ boys at one go was another matter altogether, but one should never underestimate Johnny Kitagawa’s powers of persuasion. Besides, the advertising dollar that rolled in would far surpass the price of the 3 idols, in any case.

Regardless the reasons, and Jin could care less about the politics Johnny played as long as it was to his benefit, he really enjoyed the company of his friends on set. Jin and Taguchi had an unspoken friendship. It did not appear so on screen because of the individual public persona they portrayed within the group dynamics, but behind closed doors, Taguchi was someone Jin could talk to. As for Yokoyama, he was fun to be around, being the natural mood-lifter that he was. On top of that, he was a sincere friend, and a wise senpai, despite his playful nature.

The three of them sprawled around their trailer in typical Johnnys’ fashion. Jin thought that it must be odd for them to treat trailers and dressing rooms like their own home, rather than their actual homes,as they spent so much time in them.

“Since I got 2 of you KAT-TUN boys here, I want some dirt on you guys. It’d be good tidbits for my radio show,” Yokoyama spoke as he lounged on the couch. Jin smirked as he playfully flopped down on the same couch and put his head on Yokoyama’s lap. Yokoyama grunted in annoyance but did not chase Jin away. Jin flung an arm over his eyes, waiting for Taguchi to say something.

“What do you want to know?” Taguchi raised an eyebrow as he paused his PSP game and turned his attention to Yokoyama.

“Don’t look at me with such suspicion. I don’t hang out with you guys as often as we did as Juniors, and I would like to know things straight from the horse’s mouth, rather than through the grapevine like I usually do. Although, things from the grapevine are often juicier…” Yokoyama chuckled a little at his weak joke.

“Again, what do want to know? Quick, before I turn back to my game.” Taguchi said, slightly impatiently.

“Fill me in what happened after this fella left,” Yokoyama patted Jin affectionately on the cheek, and Jin returned the gesture by swatting his hand away, “and what happened after he came back….why did you come back anyway? LA chicks not good enough for you?”

“Oh shut up! I missed you, alright?” Jin responded playfully.

“Awww…I’m touched, although we all know that it’s not true. My last name doesn’t start with K.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Jin sat up and ran his fingers through his hair, still a little unused to how short his hair was.

“Yu-kun, don’t go there….” Taguchi warned, but Yokoyama paid no heed. He was concerned about Jin.

“It’s not exactly a secret you know, Jin. Everyone knew that you and Kame were close, we were only unsure of how close, only both you know that. We all heard how Johnny-san summoned the both of you up to his office after Gokusen and gave you strict instructions to change your behavour towards each other onscreen…..sometimes I think that the old man must be getting more senile as the years pass….why shove you guys together in the first place, only to pull you apart years later……come to think of it, we really are his pawns in a chess game only he knows how to play…..”

Jin shrugged, it didn’t matter, whatever Yokoyama said. Sure, it was Johnny who forced him and Kame together in the first place, but the bonds of friendship that they formed were real, separate from what the public perceived of them. Pawns or not, he believed in what he had shared with Kame.

“The thing I want to know is,” Yokoyama was not finished, “why is it that Kame and Koki is allowed, when Kame and Jin was not? And what makes it more intriguing is that KoKame is real, they are together right? Whereas AkaKame was a product of JE PR and fans, of course.”

AkaKame was real, dammit, Jin thought, but Yokoyama brought up a good point, a point that Jin did not see up till now. He looked expectantly at Taguchi, because he sure as hell did not know what went down during the period he was away.

Taguchi frowned, not really sure what to say.

“Oh come on, Taguchi, spill. I’m curious, and look, Jin is curious too.”

Sighing, Taguchi directed his answer to Jin, “I was not exactly privy to everything that happened. I’ve only heard bits and pieces from Maru whom Koki talks to. I…I..think Kame and Koki slept together the night of your going-away press conference….” Taguchi stopped for a response.

Yamapi had already filled him in on that much, and so Jin nodded, and waited for Taguchi to continue.

“Well, Kame and Koki were filming a drama together, and them sticking close did the drama good, so Johnny let them. That much, I know for sure. I don’t know if you noticed, but Kame has changed, Jin. He’s more strong-willed now; adamant about getting what he wants, when he wants it. I sometimes miss the young and carefree Kamenashi……”

“Taguchi…..please….” Yokoyama rolled his eyes, noticing that Taguchi was going off tangent. Jin kept silent, taking it all in.

“Oh, right. Erm….I did hear that the managers tried to talk to Kame and Koki, but according to the little I got from Maru, Kame stood firm and fought for them. Apparently, he told Johnny that he would leave the company if Johnny was against him and Koki…..”

“Right, and Kame’s really popular now, so Johnny couldn’t afford for him to leave…..makes good business sense….” Yokoyama deduced on his own.

“Yeah, so JE did a PR spin on it, and fans seem to accept it….I guess Kame got what he wanted…..” Taguchi’s voice faded as he observed his friend.

Jin was digesting the new information. So Kame fought for his relationship with Koki. He could not help but admire Kame. Kame did what Jin had not dared to a year and a half ago. Jin was afraid of his burgeoning feelings for Kame, and in order to nip it in the bud, he flew off to LA, telling himself that he wanted the adventure, when in actual fact, he was running away.

“Jin? You ok?” Taguchi asked, worry in his artificially-blue eyes. Yokoyama stepped up and patted Jin on the shoulder.

“I’m fine guys,” Jin forced a smile, “I don’t see why you’re worried about me. Kame’s my friend, and I’m happy he got what he wanted…..now, if you excuse me, the toilet beckons.”

The 2 guys watched as Jin walked out of the trailer.

“Do you think he’s really alright?” Yokoyama asked.

“I don’t know. Only he knows, I guess.” Taguchi replied, feeling a little tired from all the drama. He did not know how Jin and Kame handled it, there seemed to be so much drama going on between them all the time. They must be exhausted. Thank God he had Rena, and his video games. It was all he needed.

***

Early March 2008, sound recording for Don’t You Ever Stop

“Kamenashi Kazuya! Hold it right there!”

Kame had just entered the back entrance of the JE recording studios when he heard a voice calling out to him. He was on the way for his voice recording session for KAT-TUN’s next single.

“Pi! Long time no see!” Kame smiled at Yamapi, except that his smile was not returned.

“We need to talk.” Yamapi was curt as he took Kame’s arm and pulled him to the nearest rehearsal room, locking the door.

“What is it?” Kame was puzzled. Pi usually had a friendly smile for Kame. They had become close ever since they worked together on Nobuta, and then Shuji to Akira. Pi had always been Jin’s friend, and because he was, Kame tried his best to be friendly to Pi too, and the effort was always reciprocated, except for now.

“You need to fucking fix whatever that is broken between you two, because I sure as hell don’t want to be involved anymore.”

“Quit peppering your sentences with curses, I don’t understand a word of what you’re saying.” Kame gritted his teeth, having an inkling of what Yamapi was driving at.

“Jin. Talk to him. He’s driving himself insane, and me along with him!”

“Oh. Why? Is he stressed?” It has been 2 weeks since the kiss, a kiss which Kame was trying, for 2 weeks, to erase from his memory.

“Stop with the pretense. You know what I’m talking about. He’s been flat out drunk every fuckin’ day for the past 2 weeks, and I’m sick of playing his nanny.”

***

“Fuck Jin, I hate it when you show up at my door dead drunk like that!”

“I’m so confused, Pi, so very very confused…..why….Pi….why…..”

“Why what, Jin?”

“He…he…kissed…me..back, Pi…he kissed…hic….me…back….”

“You kissed him?! Are you out of your mind?!!!”

“We kissed….hic….it was GREAT…..but Koki….he wants Koki….not me…..”

“You are such a dickhead. Of course he wants Koki, because YOU’RE AN IDIOT!”

“It’s so fucked up……so fucked up…….”

***

“I don’t think I can help,” Kame started to walk towards the door.

“Kame, please, just talk to him. He’ll hear you out. Crush his heart if you have to, tell him you want Koki, not him. At least try to get it through his thick skull. It might be healthier for him this way.”

‘You’re a good friend, Pi, better than what I can ever be.” With that, Kame walked out, giving no indication that he had absorbed anything that Yamapi had said.

***

It was one of those times that Kame wished he had Koki with him. He did not want to face Jin alone, particularly since he did not want to think about, or bring up whatever happened the other night. He might have been tipsy, but he was lucid enough to remember the feel of Jin’s lips on his, and how, for a fleeting moment, there and then, all he wanted was to belong to Jin, just Jin, not how he belonged to JE, to the fans, to Koki.

About an hour after he left Jin in the parking lot that night, after he had showered, after he had changed into his sleep clothes and had curled up in bed did Koki come home. Koki had rushed to his side and had held him in a fierce embrace, thinking that the thing bothering Kame was his work. Koki had tried to kiss away everything that was troubling Kame, and Kame had let him, but for the first time since he made up his mind to be with Koki, he wanted to turn away from the sweet man that loved him so much. He had to fight the compulsion to push Koki away, to turn on his side, to fall asleep with the taste of Jin, not Koki, in his mouth. And Kame hated himself for it. Kame truly felt like he was a horrible person, but no matter how hard to tried to search, regret was nowhere to be found.

These emotions made it hard for Kame to face Jin, even his thick professional façade that has always been foolproof seemed too thin to mask his turmoil. Kame was feeling fragile, and he needed Koki, his rock, to be beside him, to remind him who he belonged to.

But alas, it was not to be as Kame laid eyes on Jin for the first time in 2 weeks, through the glass window of the recording studio. It was a common occurrence, Jin and Kame would usually record their voices on the same day, sometimes together in the recording studio, and sometimes separately, but they still needed to listen to each other, as their voices were the key mixes to make the song work.

Koki and the rest of KAT-TUN have recorded their parts a couple of days earlier, and Koki had thought it would be good day to go hiking with his brother, as spring was almost upon them. He would have waited another day to go with Kame, but Kame saw how much Koki needed bonding time with his brother. Even though Kame enjoyed the company of Koki’s family, he knew that there were some things they could not talk about with him around, and it was something he respected.

Kame took a deep breath and walked through the heavy sound proof door. It was as though Jin had not noticed his presence. Jin was leaning in the corner of the room, slouching as though he had no spine, with his cap peaked so low, covering his tired eyes. Jin had the headphones on, already ahead of Kame, listening to the tune, and what the others have recorded. If Jin was going to ignore him, all the better, it made it easier.

However, Kame found it hard to ignore how Jin swayed in front of the microphone, and how he sang sloppily, causing them to stop and start countless times. It was also hard to ignore how Jin would bang at things, throwing the headphones or music sheets down with unnecessary force.

After about 2 hours of frustration, Kame finally had enough. When Jin made the same mistake for the gazillionth time, Kame lost it.

“Manager-san, is it alright if you and the sound crew leave Akanishi and I for a bit? Something’s not right with the session, and I want to discuss it with him.” Kame said with all the patience he could muster.

When the manager and crew acceded to Kame’s request, goodness knows they were all in favour of it, considering the worse than bad recordings so far, Kame immediately channeled his anger towards Jin.

“FUCK YOU JIN! Who turns up FUCKING DRUNK to work??!! You’re wasting everyone’s time, and not to mention money….as I said before, I don’t give a fuck what you do in your private life, but if it affects KAT-TUN, I WILL NOT STAND FOR IT! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?”

Jin collapsed in irrepressible laughter, a laugh that was so bitter.

“I can’t compartmentalize my emotions like you, Kamenashi Kazuya. Or maybe you don’t have any emotions.”

“I don’t give a shit what you can or cannot do, Akanishi.”

“Then what do you give a shit about? WORK? KAT-TUN?” Jin staggered up close to Kame, almost spitting in his face.

“That’s right, and Koki, of course,” Kame smelled the stale alcohol in Jin’s breath and he wanted to throw up.

“Koki……Koki…….” Jin leaned in as though to force himself on Kame. Kame, not wanting to be touched backed away slowly, until his back came into contact with the soft walls of the studio.

“Yes, Koki, my boyfriend.” Kame’s voice was annoyingly steady.

“How can I forget Koki is your boyfriend?!” Jin was ranting, “You stick him in my face every chance you get! He’s the one you want! HE’S THE ONE YOU WANT!!!!”

“Yes he is! You’re drunk Jin, go wash your face and sober up! I want to finish recording early so that I can be with Koki!”

“SHUT UP ABOUT KOKI!!!! WHAT ABOUT ME??!! IF YOU DON’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ME, WHY DID YOU KISS ME???!!!” Jin slammed a fist in the wall next to Kame’s head. If the walls had not been soft, Jin would definitely have broken his knuckles with the force he used.

Kame winced, “It was a mistake, I was drunk, like you are now. Go. Wash. Up.”

“You’re always telling people what to do, aren’t you? You want to be in control….” Jin leered, “How about me being in control for once? I’ll tell Koki how you kissed me, how you shoved your tongue in my mouth and rubbed up against me. How you wrapped your arms around me so so tightly….how it was me you wanted that night…you wanted ME, NOT HIM…..”

SLAP!

The stinging pain brought clarity to Jin’s mind. Kame had used his professional pitcher swing to lay a quick hand on Jin’s cheek. Jin stood there, stunned, as he witnessed Kame’s face contort in absolute fury. And yet, Kame was the epitome of self control.

“Are you sober now?” Kame spoke dangerously slowly.

Jin nodded.

“Kame…I…didn’t…mean….I’m…s….”

“If it’s not about work, I don’t want to hear a word from you. When manager-san and the rest get back, we are going to finish recording this well, is that clear?”

And all Jin could do was nod again, and walked back, shoulders sagging, towards his microphone.

***

Yamapi probably expected a different, softer approach, but Kame felt that he got through to Jin just fine with the slap, and he had said what he needed to say. His hand was still smarting and he wished he had not put so much weight behind the slap. He had stolen glances at Jin during the rest of the recording, and noticed that Jin’s cheek was red and swollen. It must really have hurt, and Kame’s heart ached. He did not really blame Jin for being so angry, he would be too, if he was in Jin’s shoes, but to have threatened him like that, and bringing Koki into the argument, it was just too much. Kame sighed.

It was for the best, he told himself, as he gathered his coat from his locker, ready to leave for the day.

“K…k..ame?”

Kame paused a little, but did not turn, and continued putting on his coat.

“Haven’t we spoken enough for today Jin?”

“Please, Kame, look at me. I have something to say.”

Taking a deep breath, Kame spun around and his guts did a little flip flop. Jin had emerged from the shower stalls. Kame guessed that he took a shower to wash away the residual alcohol in his system. Kame thanked God that at least Jin was fully dressed in a long-sleeved t-shirt and dark jeans, instead of being in a towel. Jin looked sexy enough as it is, with his hair wet and in tight tendrils around his face.

“What is it Jin?” Kame said in a tone to give an impression that he was impatient and did not have much time for this encounter. He did not want to be alone with Jin longer than he had to. He was afraid of what would happen if he did.

Jin sat on the bench and tried to form his words. He observed Kame standing next to him, tapping his foot. Looks like Kame really did not want to be near him. Jin sighed, he had to say what he was about to, it would give him closure, something he obviously needed to walk away from Kame once and for all.

“I went to LA because I was afraid.”

“You were afraid?” Kame folded his arms across his chest and raised an eyebrow.

“Yes, afraid,” Jin buried his face in his hands and continued, “I was falling for you, and I was afraid of those feelings. I didn’t know what to do with them. I told Johnny that I needed a break, and after rounds of attempted persuasion, he relented and hooked me up with a language course……I ran away to see if I could get rid of my feelings. I didn’t want my feelings for you to destroy the career that you worked so hard to build. This career means so much more to you, then to me….”

So Jin had feelings for him, just as he had almost 2 years ago. Kame felt resentment bubbling up inside him, mixed with a sense of loss. Jin did not give Kame a chance. If only Jin had known of Kame’s own feelings. Things would not be what they were now.

“Rubbish….Jin, what utter rubbish,” Kame shook his head as he clenched his fist. “You went to LA because you were selfish. You could have stayed and faced the situation. Deal with it if your feelings were unrequited. Instead, you escaped, leaving the 5 of us to pick up the pieces….. whatever Jin, you left, you came back, things are not the same…..and I don’t care….”

Jin bit his lip, “I’m not saying all this to get you to care, I just wanted you to know.”

“And now I do. What’s your point, Jin?”

Jin looked up to search Kame’s eyes. He marveled at Kame’s steadfastness, the control that he had. “I will leave you alone from now on. I will maintain our relationship as friendly colleagues, nothing more. It’s what you want from me, isn’t it?”

No it’s not Jin, it’s not what I want from you! Kame screamed inside his head but he could not say it out loud. He had lost his voice as his entire being twisted in agony at his choices. So, Kame simply nodded and walked towards the door.

“You know…..”

Kame stopped for the second time in the locker room, but did not face Jin. He wished Jin would stop talking, Kame was at breaking point.

“Koki’s a lucky bastard, and Kame, if it were anyone else, I would not give up so easily, but it’s Koki, and I know he loves you, and would treat you right. I see the way he stares at you with so much tenderness……”

“Stop it Jin!” Kame stormed over to where Jin was sitting. He took hold of Jin’s shoulders and crushed his lips onto Jin’s. He kissed Jin with a passion that he had hidden away for so long, conveying the complexities that he could not put in words. He ran his fingers through Jin’s wet hair, moving through every strand. He leaned closer in when he felt Jin respond. He felt Jin’s hand hold on to his hips as Jin opened his mouth wider, an invitation for Kame’s tongue.

This time, they were both coherent. They both could feel the tightly coiled tension between them. They both could feel how wrong this was. And this time, it was Jin that pushed Kame away, gently, regrettably. Jin looked deep into Kame’s glistening eyes, and dropped his gaze to the red swollen lips, opened ever so slightly, panting wisps of delicate air.

“Kazuya….we shouldn’t….I….Ko…”

“Stop it, Jin, just stop….” Kame whispered as he searched for Jin’s lips again. Stop it Jin, just stop.

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A/N: I just HAD to put a dig about Taguchi and Rena in here. Sorry about that. I kinda wrote myself into a corner with this one. I wonder how I'm going to dig myself out.....

[Fan Fic] Supernova - Chapter 5

Wed, 09 Sep 2009 05:44:43 GMT

Title: SUPERNOVA
Author: blinkbling24
Genre: AU, Angst (a little I think), Sci-Fi (a bit of a cross between X-men and Heroes), Smut (maybe)
Rating: R to NC-17 (to be safe)
Warning: Unbeta-ed, so please excuse accidental grammer and/or spelling errors, if any.
Summary: Akanishi Jin has always been the blue-eyed boy of the Academy. What happens when one day Kamenashi Kazuya joins the folds? What role do they play in each other's lives, and can they use what is given to them to save what they hold dear?
Author's Notes: This was actually a summer contest entry 2009 for the akame_community but I had to pull out because I could not finish it in time. I'm trying to revive the inspiration for this, because I quite like what I have going for it. It's proving to be complicated though, so be patient with me.

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Chapter 5

“HELP!!! OH GOD! KAME!!” Jin was so distraught that he could not focus enough to move the rocks with his mind, so he did the next best thing. He used his hands, frantically removing the rubble one by one, not caring that his hands and arms were severely scratched and torn by the rocks’ rough edges. But it was not fast enough, and with every second that passed, Kame’s chances of surviving were lowered. Kame did not have any powers that were useful enough to get him out of this situation.

“KAME!!! CAN YOU HEAR ME??!!” Hot tears were streaming down Jin’s cheeks, streaking his face through the dirt and grime.

“Jin! What happened?” Ueda flew to his side.

“UEDA! Thank God you’re here! Can you walk through and check if Kame is alright?”

Ueda walked up to the rubble wall, pressed his palms on the rocks, but did not go any further.

“WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?

“I can’t.”

“What do you mean you can’t? You still don’t like him, that’s why you WON’T right?!” Jin said through gritted teeth, continuously removing rock after rock.

“No Jin. I can’t. My powers are not working in here. For some weird reason. It was working fine out there.”

Jin barely heard him, only noticing that Koki had joined them.

“Koki! Can you hear Kame at all? Can you hear him breathing?”

Koki cocked his head to the side and listened. He raised his eyebrows in puzzlement.

“I can’t hear a thing Jin. Not a single sound beyond you and Ueda here. Weird…..”

Indeed, something strange was going on in that unnatural cave formed from rubble, but Jin was oblivious. All he could think of was that his dear friend was trapped and possibly severely injured behind that rock wall.

“Well then, if you guys can’t use your powers, use your hands, goddammit! KAME! Can you hear me??!!”

Hearing the desperation in Jin’s voice, Koki and Ueda looked at each other for a quick second before joining their friend in the search.

***

On the other side of the wall, Kame’s eyes were wide open, staring up at the jagged rock ceiling. His legs were pinned under a large boulder, and the back of his head had hit a sharp rock when he fell from the impact of the collapse. Thick deep-red blood was pooling round his head, and if Kame paid any heed to it, he would notice that the blood was starting to cake around the wound, emitting a putrid smell. But no, Kame was focusing on something else. He was focusing on the fact that he wanted Jin to rescue him, and no one else.

“Kazuya!”

“I’m listening…”

“What are you doing? This was not the plan.”

“I’m binding him to me, just as you instructed, mother.”

“Will it work?”

“I know him.”

“Very well. You know what you’re doing.”

“Yes I do.”

It was not meant to be like this. It was supposed to be Jin buried under the rubble, and Kame was to be the one rescuing him. However, when Kame heard the cave rumble, he did not think, he simply acted. His mind was a blur of confusion, but he knew clearly that he did not want Jin to get hurt. Jin must not get hurt. Now, trapped in a cave illuminated by his own body, and injured, Kame waited. He waited for Jin, and only Jin, to come for him. Kame heard the desperate calling of his name on the other side, and his heart lurched. He wanted to shout back, to reassure Jin he was alright, but he could not. He had to maintain his focus, he needed to. He was holding on to too much to let himself go now.

***

Jin opened his eyes to the stark white walls of the Academy’s sanitarium. Disoriented, he tried sitting up, but his head felt heavy. He closed his eyes again. What had happened? He remembered moving rock after rock, he remembered calling out for Kame. It felt like eternity, but finally, he heard a faint “Jin…I’m…..here….” Jin remembered scrambling towards that weak voice. He remembered how much it pained him to see Kame lying in his own pool of blood, face void of any colour. He remembered shouting to Ueda and Koki for help. He remembered pushing the big boulder with all his might, but it would not budge, it just would not. It was too big, and he was too weak. He could not save his friend. And then, the world went black.

Kame! Where was Kame? His eyes shot open again as he sat up with a start and searched frantically round the sanitarium. His panicked heart was soothed by a soft voice, “Jin, I’m here.” He turned his head to his right, and met with the familiar pair of sparkly eyes looking at him with warmth and amusement. But Jin could not bring himself to share the amusement, not when he saw that Kame was so severely injured.

“You’re hurt so bad!” Jin found the strength to jump off his bed and rush to Kame’s bedside.

“Oh really? I hadn’t noticed,” Kame smiled his bright smile as he gazed up at Jin. Jin was pushing his bangs gently away from his forehead that was swathed with a bandage that went completely round his head. Kame’s right leg was in a cast, suspended at a 45 degree angle from the bed. He had other scrapes and bruises too, but they were all cleaned up. “You’re not looking too good yourself,” Kame said to Jin.

It was only then that Jin noticed that his fingertips were raw and throbbing, and he had a big bandage wrapped around his right arm that was semi-soaked with his blood and some sort of medicated ointment.

“What…happened…?” Jin scratched the back of his head, slightly embarrassed that he could not remember.

“Well, you blacked out from exhaustion, so Koki and Ueda had to carry you out. Maru and Taguchi caught up, and used their combined powers to break down the boulder that was crushing my leg. The Academy was radioed, and Kimura-san sent the Academy jet for the 2 of us. The rest flew back on their own. We’re both ok. The Doc looked us over. Doc said your wounds are superficial, and should heal on their own. He did not want to use his powers when nature can run its course nicely. For me, the blow on my head formed a blood clot in my brain, which Doc drained. The wound is now healing on its own. My leg bone was crushed, and Doc formed it back, but I still have to be in a cast to give my new bone time to harden. Shouldn’t take more than a week.” Kame smiled at the worried Jin, but behind that smile was something else, a prickle of guilt. What Kame did not tell Jin was how he held on, how he controlled the situation until Jin found him. He could not, he must not. Kame saw how worried Jin was, how Jin’s brows were furrowed, creasing his forehead deeply, and Kame could not bear it. “Feel better, Jin, I’m ok, and look, we saved many many lives. Isn’t that want you hoped for?” Kame turned slightly and took Jin’s hands in his, running gentle fingers over the raw, tender skin.

Jin looked down at their hands, feeling the acute pain as Kame’s fingers swept past his blisters. Somehow, the relief he had was not for the many lives he saved, but for the pure fact that Kame was there, right in front of him, smiling and looking at him with those eyes. It felt that everything had melted away, and all he had was Kame.

“Kame,” Jin spoke softly. Kame saw Jin’s eyes glisten, and his warmed to it.

“Yes, Jin?” Kame replied equally softly.

“Don’t ever put your life in danger for me again,” Jin choked.

You scared me Kame, you really scared me.

“No.” Kame held on to Jin’s hand.

Don’t get close to me Jin. I’m bad for you.

“Promise me.”

“I promise.”

The currents of emotions that coursed through them were simple, and yet complicated at the same time. One had the purest form of friendship, affection and a little bit of something else, whereas the other was struggling to repel the purity that was slowly beginning to emerge within him.

***

“It’s done, mother.”

“Yes, I can tell. Well done, my son.”

“Mother…I…..”

“Remember that I will not stand for weakness Kazuya!”

“Yes mother.”

“Keep Jin close, and be ready for what is to come.”

“I will.”

***

It was almost bedtime, a week later, when Jin was summoned to the Professor’s chambers.

“You asked to see me Professor?”

“Ah yes, Jin-kun, come in.”

Closing the heavy oak door to the Professor’s chambers behind him, Jin stepped up to stand beside the Professor. It was a position that Jin was familiar with. The Professor was in his usual stance, gazing at the vast black wall before him. In the past, Jin will stand precisely in the same spot, holding the Professor’s hand, hearing the Professor tell stories of the people that only the Professor could see. People who had special gifts, like him. Jin always treated those people in the Professor’s stories like family, because they had something similar to what he had, and he hoped to meet all of them one day.

“It’s been a while since we did this.”

Jin acknowledged the Professor’s words. It has indeed been a while. It was not on purpose that Jin hardly saw the Professor, it was just a natural progression, like how a child, previously so attached to his parents, would gradually grow wings and try those wings out. But, no matter how far the child flew, he would never truly leave the nest. The nest was home.

The Professor seemed lost in what he was seeing on the wall. Jin followed the Professor’s gaze and stared at the black nothingness in front of him.

“It must be very beautiful in your eyes, Professor, seeing all the lights glittering. You have your own personal stars.”

The Professor chuckled, “The things you say, Jin-kun. I forget sometimes.”

Jin smiled. He was glad he made the Professor’s disposition lighten a little. He knew that the Professor bore a lot of weight on his shoulders, and Jin had always wanted to lift it, even if it was just a little. The Professor was the closest thing to a father to him, and Jin treasured their relationship.

“Your wounds?"

“Getting better, Professor. Very soon, I’ll be terrorizing the young ones in the sky again.”

“Good good,” the Professor seemed distracted, “And Kamenashi-kun?”

“Kame? He’s fine. It’s amazing how he takes everything in his stride. He’s really strong, and I admire him for it…..”

“Jin-kun,” the Professor interrupted.

“Yes, Professor?” Jin watched as the Professor frowned, as if there was something at the tip of his tongue, and yet he struggled to say it. “Nothing,” the Professor managed to swallow the words he wanted to say and gazed back at the wall.

“Who are you watching Professor?” Jin asked, curious.

“I’m not watching, I’m looking, at you.”

“Me?”

“Yes, you’re such a steady light. Bright, constant, like you’re leading the way for others.”

“That’s good isn’t it?”

Instead of answering Jin directly, the Professor said, “You are special, Jin-kun.”

“Aren’t we all?” Jin thought that the Professor was going to launch into his usual spiel about how all of them in the Academy were special, and they should not anyone tell them otherwise.

But that was not what the Professor meant, “What is your relationship with Kamenashi-kun?”

Taken aback at the sudden change of subject, Jin could not form a coherent answer, “Erm…he’s…..a friend, I think, but sometimes……”

“I see.”

“What’s wrong, Professor?”

“Nothing that you should concern yourself with,” the Professor reassured, patting Jin on the shoulder, “It’s late. Get some rest.”

“Yes Professor. You get some rest too.” Jin was not sure if the Professor heard him as he had turned his attention back to the wall just as Jin walked out of the room, wearing the same worrying frown on his face.

***

Kame was dreaming. In his dream, he felt weightless, a sensation he had never felt in his entire life. It was as though his mind was emptied of everything he had to take control of, and he was finally able to be himself. He was flying, flying to a particularly clearing that he knew. Only this time, it was daylight, and the sun sparkled on the green leaves of the trees in the charming little woodland area. He landed gently and looked around. Something was different. The huge boulder was not there anymore.

“Kame, you’re here.”

“Jin.” Kame extended his arm to place his hand into the hand that was reaching out to him. Jin pulled him close and hugged him. Kame felt his heart burst with an emotion he presumed was joy.

“I did it Kame. I moved it.” Jin whispered in Kame’s ear, and in Kame’s sleep, he moaned softly in reaction to it.

“Congratulations!” Kame hugged Jin with all that he had.

Jin pulled them apart, and placed his hands on Kame’s shoulders. Kame, even in his dream, was enthralled by Jin’s eyes that shone with so much excitement.

“Come with me.”

“What?”

“Come with me, Kame.”

Suddenly, Kame felt like he was plunged into darkness. All the weight that was lifted came crashing back. He crouched down, feeling the pain. Jin was still smiling at him, and muttering, “come with me….kame….come with me…..”, he tried to reach out, but Jin was fading, getting lighter and lighter, until he disappeared, leaving Kame behind.

Kame woke himself up to the screaming in his head. His breathing was frenzied until he realized he was dreaming. Shakily, he pulled the blanket over his head, trying to shut everything out.

I wish I could, Jin, I really wish I could.

***

In his room down the long hallway from Kame’s, Jin, too, was experiencing something different. For some reason, he wanted to see his mother again, and so he time travelled, preparing himself to be a silent observer to the scenes before him. However, he had travelled to a strange place in time. It was the past, he could tell, but it was a past that he did not remember. He peered in through the 8^th floor window of the apartment unit he and his mother had shared. The apartment looked so different. Everything was so shiny and new, not like the dump that he remembered. Even the neighbourhood was different, not the seedy area that he had spent his childhood in.

He smiled softly as he watched his mother potter around the modest kitchen, preparing dinner. It would have been a heartwarming sight if not for the fact that Jin had never seen his mother like this. His memory of her when he was a boy was that she was frequently ill, so she never really much around the kitchen. Even though he loved his mother dearly, he had never seen her look as radiant and beautiful as she did in front of him through the window. It was as though she had something to live for.

Jin noticed that his mother had turned to speak to someone. There was someone else in the apartment. Who could it be? Jin knew now that it could not have been him, this was a time even before he existed. He peered in further, only to find that his view was obscured by a wall. All he could do was wait, as he watched his mother dish out the food and set the table.

Soon enough, he saw a man emerge from the bathroom. Jin squinted. What was his mother doing with a strange man in the apartment? He observed as his mother smiled lovingly at the man and ran into his embrace. He watched as the man placed an affectionate hand on his mother’s belly.

Could it be…..? Jin shook his head, he could not believe what was before him.

And then, he saw it. His watch, on the man’s wrist. Jin backed away from the window, shocked and dumbfounded. He wanted to find out more, but he felt himself fading away. “No, not now…” Jin pleaded but his powers would not listen. Just as he completely faded away, the man turned his face to the window and gave Jin a silent wink.

Now, lying on his bed, in the same position he teleported back in, Jin could not sleep. All he could think was, “shit….did I just see my father?”

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A/N: I just want to add that I'm very proud of Jin at the moment, and I can't wait for Bandage to be out!!!

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 10

Wed, 26 Aug 2009 05:10:34 GMT

Title: Fragments

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame, Kokame

Genre: Angst, Romance, Smut

Rating: NC-17 (As there will be smut in subsequent chapters)

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: In life and love, you can’t have everything that you want, or can you?

Chapter 10

January 3^rd, 2008, recording of LIPS PV

Early morning call times were the bane of Jin’s existence. He hated getting up early. On the rare times that it was for something he looked forward to, it would have been tolerable. However, most of the time, it was like this, sitting in front of the mirror in the make-up studio, allowing stylists and make-up artists to do whatever they wanted to him, just waiting for Kame and Koki to make their lovey-dovey entrance. Jin hated it, why should he open his eyes and drag his feet to something that made him sick in the gut? But, he had no choice, he was part of KAT-TUN and as Kame said, he had responsibilities.

Jin shook his head slightly as the make-up artist tsk-ed at the state of his skin - sallow, lacking of any colour.

“Akanishi-san, you have not been sleeping well?”

Thinking back to the night before, he chose not to answer. Instead, he closed his eyes in an attempt to catch forty-winks. It was, after all, only 7.00 in the morning. He was indeed not sleeping well. After his run-in with Kame at the club on New Year’s Day, he had very much wanted to bring the girl home and fuck his brains out just to spite Kame. Bring the girl home he did, but after one session, he knew that she was incapable of satisfying him, not when he had Kame’s scornful voice, and piercing eyes in his head. He chased the girl out of his apartment and spent the rest of the night, and the entire next day just lying in bed, staring at the ceiling. He pondered his decision to return to Japan, whether he should leave again, whether his friendship with Kame could be salvaged. Honestly, never in the course of his time LA did he imagine that his friendship with Kame would become so strained. They had always gotten along, and even though Jin’s previous hope of progressing a step further with Kame had been dashed, what with Kame being with Koki and all, he at least thought that they would remain friends. It was, however, proving not to be the case.

“GOOD MORNING EVERYONE!”

Hissing under his breath, Jin opened his eyes to see an overly cheerful Koki bounding through the door, beaming from ear to ear.

“Whoa! Koki! It’s unethical to be so cheerful so early in the morning,” Maru commented from his seat in front of the mirror.

“Yeah,” remarked Taguchi who was fussing with his newly-coloured ash brown hair, “Did Kame give you some last night?”

“Shut up Taguchi,” Kame swaggered into the room a couple of seconds after Koki made his entrance. Everyone’s, with the exception of Koki, jaw dropped when they saw Kame. Not only was Kame limping a little, he looked positively exhausted. Kame sighed at his bandmates’ reaction and walked to his chair.

“Make-up-san, do something about my dark eye rings ok?” He instructed before slumping into the seat.

Koki sat down next to Ueda, still smiling widely. Ueda leaned in and asked, “What did you guys do? Fuck for 2 days?”

“Ermm….well…yeah, sort of….”

“Koki! It’s PRIVATE life for a reason.” Kame spoke as he sat still, with his eyes closed, allowing the make-up artist to work her magic.

Having heard enough, Jin got up from where he was sitting and stormed out of the room.

“Akanishi-san! We haven’t done your hair yet! We have to touch up the roots!”

“I need a smoke. I’ll wear a fuckin’ hat later, go find me one!”

“What’s up with him?” Taguchi dared ask the rest.

Ueda shrugged, “Maybe he didn’t get as much as Kame and Koki….”

“OY!’ Koki walked over and head-locked Ueda, causing the older man to mock-choke.

Kame creased his brows. His headache was not getting any better with the loud horse-playing. Also, he could not help but wonder about Jin. What was up with him?

***

Koki was trawling the huge studio looking for something when he heard Jin’s voice.

“What are you looking for?”

“Painkillers. Kame’s not feeling too good. He’s had a headache since last night.”

“I saw a first aid box somewhere. Come, follow me.”

Jin led Koki to a small pantry equipped with a tiny microwave and a simple coffee making machine. Jin pointed to a drawer at the counter and said, “It’s somewhere in there. Help yourself.”

Koki nodded his thanks and Jin started to walk out the door.

“Err…Jin?"

“Yup?” Jin turned and smiled at his friend.

Smiling back, Koki asked, “Would you like to have a cup of coffee with me? Here? It looks like you need one.”

“Sure, why not? But what about Kame?” Jin almost tripped on the name.

“He can wait a couple of minutes. Besides, I think he’s resting a little as he’s getting his make-up done.” Koki replied as he started pouring the coffee powder into the machine.

Rather than say anything that might give himself away, Jin helped with the coffee and soon they both were leaning on the counter, taking careful sips from their mismatched mugs.

They stood side by side in friendly silence. Koki was right. Coffee was just what Jin needed to clear his head at the moment. His mind cleared as he savoured the caffeine, and he finally felt ready to face the day.

“Jin?”

“Yeah?” He turned to meet with worried eyes.

“I’m worried about Kame.”

Shit. Since when did agreeing to have coffee turn him into Agony Aunt? “What makes you say that?” Jin asked out of politeness more than anything else. He really did not want to know. He buried his nose into his coffee mug, inhaling the aroma as he waited for Koki to speak.

Heaving a heavy sigh, Koki continued, “I’m not really sure. He’s himself, but not really. It seems like he’s trying to be better than himself, pushing himself to the limit. This new drama……he’s hardly at home…..going to the gym….and staying there the whole day……and he comes back exhausted…..like he’s doing it on purpose….making himself so tired that he just falls straight to sleep……I don’t know what’s wrong, and I try to help, but he won’t let me, just keeps saying he’s ok, it’s just what this drama requires of him….”

Seeing that Koki had transitioned from talking to him to mumbling to himself, Jin intercepted, “Koki?” He paused and waited for Koki to stop his monologue.

He really did not want to do this. “Kame has always been a perfectionist. It’s a flaw that he has. And since…..since….I….er…left…..he has been feeling, more than ever, responsible for KAT-TUN, and feels that he has to be successful for KAT-TUN to be successful. He’s putting too much pressure on himself, if you ask me.”

“But, I need to do something, you know?” It was more a rhetorical question on Koki’s part but Jin acknowledged it.

“It’s not something that you can do. He’s gotta realize it for himself. Meanwhile, just be his support. But you already are…..just be a friend that he can run to……”

“Are you his friend?”

“What?” Jin almost spit out the last mouthful of his coffee.

“Are you his friend, Jin?”

“I would like to think I am,” Jin said softly as he turned to rinse his mug in the sink.

Koki smiled at Jin kindly, “He treasures what he had with you.”

Facing Koki, Jin saw, very faintly, a flicker of hurt and pain in his eyes. “You really love him, don’t you?”

Koki did not have to answer. Jin could see it in his eyes. He patted Koki on his shoulder showing that he understood and received the same camaraderie.

***

Just as Jin and Koki were about to walk out to set, with Koki holding on to the painkillers and a bottle of water for Kame, they heard a loud ruckus coming from the dressing area, complete with wolf calling. Before the two of them could reach the door, it burst open and a very annoyed Kame stomped out.

“Koki! There you are! Thank God! Painkillers!” Not waiting for Koki to say anything, Kame reached out and swallowed the tablets with one gulp. It was only then that he realized that his boyfriend was staring at him with a flabbergasted expression on his face.

“Oh no!” Kame groaned, “Not you too! It’s only eyeliner, for God’s sake.”

Finally regaining his senses, Koki walked up to Kame and wrapped his arms around his waist. He whispered something in Kame’s ear, causing Kame to giggle in spite of his headache, which was gradually fading due to the medication.

Having backed off the minute Kame burst out of the room, Jin, observing from the shadows of the set, had a hard time focusing as well. Kame looked positively sizzling with his kohl eyes, glossy lips and newly structured body. Jin gulped and willed his body to behave, even though he wanted nothing more than to grab Kame and engage him in a mind-blowing round of hot sex. Yet, all he could do was watch and try to be nonchalant as Kame and Koki dance their lovers’ dance all throughout the recording. When the day was finally over, all Jin wanted to do was to crawl under the covers, and hopefully fall into a dreamless sleep.

***

Late February 2008

The sound of his ringtone jolted Jin out of sleep, and he was not happy.

“Jin?”

“Yeah?” Jin croaked. He threw a glance at the clock by his bedside and saw that it was 2.30am.

“It’s Koki. Are you asleep?”

“I was, and I plan to fall back to sleep,” Jin answered grumpily. His sentence was met with an awkward silence.

“Oh, spill it! You must have woken me up for a reason more than for me to hear you breathing."

“Could you go get Kame?”

Jin dropped his phone in shock and scrambled around his covers to find it. Thank goodness for its glowing blue light.

“Why?” He composed himself enough to ask.

“He’s kinda drunk in some pub, and he needs someone to bring him home.”

“You’re his boyfriend….”

“I’m not stupid. I would if I could. I’m over at my parents’ place this week, and it’ll take me at least 2 hours to get to him.”

“Errr…I was actually looking forward to sleeping through the night tonight….so maybe Maru, or even Taguchi…….”

“I’ve tried them. You’re the only one who picked up.”

Damn! Of all the calls to pick up in the middle of the night.

“Jin, please, if not for him, for me, as a friend.”

Burying his face in his pillow, Jin groaned and then said into the phone, “Fine. Where is he?”

***

Failure. That was all Kame saw himself at this point in time. He had worked so hard with this drama, being in the gym 24 hours a day, watching his diet. But for what? It was always not about how hard he worked, but how good the ratings were. And the ratings were not singing him praises. KAT-TUN and their latest single LIPS were doing well, it should mean that he was doing well. But that was not the case. Week after week, One Pound Gospel performed below par. It would not matter so much to him if not for the disappointed eyes he had to endure everyday during the filming period, on top of how Johnny’s Entertainment frequent reiteration of how an idol is only worth his return of investment. JE was not getting the desired advertising dollar from Kame for this drama, and they sure as hell let him know it.

What made it a million times worse was that Jin’s infuriating drama, Yukan Club, did better than his was doing at the moment. One could argue that Yukan Club was shown during the holiday season where people appreciated the light-heartedness. It was also Jin’s first drama since his return, so it was greatly anticipated. But to Kame, all it meant was that his entire year of hard work supporting the group has come to naught. Everything was just about Jin. The world revolved around Jin. Maybe he was the dispensable one, not Jin. Whatever, thought Kame as he drained his brandy. Fuck this job, he thought as he poured himself another glass from a newly opened bottle, his second for the night. Fuck the management, fuck Johnny, fuck Akanishi Jin.

“What the hell are you doing?!”

Kame allowed his glassy eyes to settle on the face in front it, and immediately regretted doing so.

“Fuck you Jin. I called Koki.”

“Nice to see you too,” Jin did not appreciate the attitude he was getting from Kame, particularly when he so did not want to be there. “Come on, let’s get out of here.”

“I’m not going anywhere with you, asshole! Where’s Koki?” Kame poured himself another glass, but before he could place it on his lips, Jin took it away from him, and gulped it down himself.

For some reason, Kame found that action incredibly funny. He collapsed in laughter over the bar, and if not for Jin’s support, he would have fallen off the stool. Jin eyed Kame cautiously, not knowing what to make of the situation. He steadied Kame, and once he was sure that Kame would not fall off, he sat next to Kame at the bar and waited for Kame to calm down.

“Are you a failure too? If you are, drink with me!” Kame exclaimed as he stopped sputtering. He reached for the bottle and poured another glass, this time smart enough, much to Jin’s annoyance, to move fast and drink it down before Jin could get to it.

“Kame, you’ve gotta stop drinking. Come, let’s go. I’ll take you home…..what the….?”

Tears. Tears were streaming down Kame’s face even as he poured himself another glass. He lifted it to his lips, but he was trembling so hard that he had to put the glass down. Kame simply buried his face in his hands and shook with silent sobs.

Jin could not bear it. He stood up, helped Kame off his stool, and enveloped Kame in as big a hug as he could manage. He felt Kame shake in his arms, even as his shoulder was getting wet with Kame’s tears.

“Ssshhh….what’s wrong?” Jin whispered gently in Kame’s ear.

“I’m just so tired, so so so tired…..so tired of trying, so tired of failing…..” Kame’s voice was muffled against Jin’s chest as he burrowed his face in it, finding comfort in the arms around him.

Jin held Kame and stroked his back until he stilled. It was only then that Jin said quietly, “You’re not a failure, Kazuya, you’re anything but. I would not be here if not for you…….Kazuya? Kame?” Kame had put all his weight on Jin and Jin noticed that he had blacked out.

Great. Jin hoisted Kame on his back and walked them both out of the bar.

***

The cool wind on his face woke Kame up from his drunken stupor. He opened his eyes to find that he was riding pillion, with his arms wrapped tightly around Jin’s waist. The night was clear and cloudless, allowing Kame to see the stars as they travelled down the highway. He wondered if Jin knew he was awake. He leaned his cheek on Jin’s back once again, and held Jin’s waist a little tighter, savouring the moment he knew he could not if he was sober.

It might not have been a wise idea to have taken the bike out, instead of his car, but it was not something Jin regretted at the moment as he cruised down the highway, with Kame safely behind him. He relished in their closeness, and gave a small smile when he felt Kame stir and wrap his arms more firmly around his waist. Was Kame awake? It was a beautiful night, and Kame should see it.

Jin swerved his bike gently to the left, taking the exit off the freeway in the direction of Kame’s apartment. The bike hugged the small residential roads so quiet that the only sound was the putt putt putting of the bike’s engine. All too soon, they arrived at their destination.

When the bike came to a halt, Jin immediately removed his helmet and turned to Kame. Refusing help, Kame descended somewhat ungracefully while taking off his helmet, still tipsy from the alcohol he had ingested. “Whoa, be careful,” Jin reached out to hold Kame’s elbow, causing them to unintentional lock gazes. Jin’s eyes had more fire in them than Kame remembered, hazel with flecks of gold dancing in the background. Kame’s eyes were molten lava, burning into Jin, searing his heart.

“Jin,” Kame breathed ever so translucently, hoping that Jin would hear it, and not hear it at the same time.

Jin heard it, it sent shivers down his spine, but he could not bring himself to answer. He did not know what to say. Were words even required at a time like this, when they were like magnets of the same polarity, repelling each other no matter how hard they try to reconcile?

It was Kame, always Kame, who blinked, breaking the moment. Kame sighed, turned around and walked a little unsteadily towards a little clearing near the apartment. He stood still and tilted his head up, looking at the stars that followed him home. He sensed Jin walk up to stand beside him.

“You should go in, get some rest,” The tenderness in Jin’s voice sent a tingle through Kame.

Kame faced the very face he had been running away from, “Why do you care Jin? Why now? When there is no need for you to?”

“Because, Kazuya,” Jin reached out and touched the luminescent skin of Kame’s cheek with the back of his hand, “I’m your friend.”

“Friend? Do you think we have ever been friends? It seems so long ago,” Kame moved closer to Jin and traced Jin’s lips with his fingers.

“I don’t really know what we are,” the words were said so breathlessly that they disappeared in the night breeze. Jin leaned down and gently brushed his lips against Kame’s, feeling the pillowy softness. Instead of jerking away, Kame pressed in and kissed Jin, moving his arms to wrap around Jin’s neck. Jin’s arms went around Kame’s waist and pulled Kame closer to deepen the kiss. They caressed with their lips, their tongue, tasting each other, succumbing to years of longing.

As suddenly as it started, Kame froze, forcing Jin to back away. The rare affection in Kame’s expression reverted to the harshness that Jin had come to be uncomfortably accustomed to.

“Thank you for sending me home. It’s late. You should go.”

With that, Kame spun on his heels and walked back to his apartment building. Jin, confused, sat on his bike for ages in Kame’s parking lot without moving, trying to make sense of everything but to no avail. It was only when he saw Koki’s car turning in that he hastily started the engine and rode off into the night.

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A/N: This chapter is a little disjointed, so I'm not too happy with it.Gomen~

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 9

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 07:04:00 GMT

Title: Fragments

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame, Kokame

Genre: Angst, Romance, Smut

Rating: NC-17 (As there will be smut in subsequent chapters)

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: In life and love, you can’t have everything that you want, or can you?

Chapter 9

New Year’s Day 2004

It was tradition. After the high-profile Johnny’s Countdown show every year, the older boys in JE would adjourn to a club that the big boss owned. Johnny Kitagawa, or at least one of his minions, would close the club the entire night for the boys to relax and indulge in revelry, good or bad. Apparently, it would be a night of debauchery, with booze, drugs and women on tap. It was a night where under-aged anything was overlooked, just for one night. Johnny Kitagawa believed that by giving his boys this outlet on this scared night they would be less likely to be running around creating scandals over the course of the year, and jeopardizing his business.

The best thing was that whatever went down in that club on this occasion would be kept secret, and all the boys knew that even if they saw or heard anything unsavory, it was never to be mentioned, ever. It was one night that Johnny would allow, a night that would never have existed once it ended. It was akin to a paparazzi blackout. Such was the power of Johnny Kitagawa, and all of Japan’s media respected it.

Juniors were never allowed to join their senpais until their senpais saw them fit to be invited. In fact, the Juniors were not even sure if such a night existed. They have only heard rumours, stories that floated around. It was Tackey that took the KAT-TUN boys aside and issued them a strictly confidential invitation. In the weeks leading up to the Countdown performance, it was all KAT-TUN could talk about amongst themselves, putting aside their petty quarrels. It was indeed a privilege, something to look forward to.

***

The youngest member of KAT-TUN sat awkwardly in a corner of a spacious booth all by himself. 18-year-old Kame was unfamiliar with most things decadent, having chosen to spend his days off playing baseball rather than join his good friend Jin, and most other JE boys, in the quest to push the envelope without getting caught where bad behavior was concerned. He winced when he heard the sound of someone puking in the next booth, and wrinkled his noise at the sour stench that followed soon after.

Looking around, he spied Taguchi, in the booth opposite, making out with a stripper decked in nothing but nipple cups and a barely-there sequined thong. Kame grinned despite his discomfort. Taguchi had a penchant for slutty chicks, Kame knew from the millions of times he had seen Taguchi ogling at girls in magazines. At the rate Taguchi was going with the tongue wrestling and fondling, it was only a matter of time before the girl would be disrobed of whatever little she had on.

Kame threw his gaze further, and spotted Ueda and Maru having a drinking match with a group of senpais, except that the drink was not a pussy drink, such as beer or vodka. The drink in play was abstinthe. He watched as his band members downed shot after shot of the green poison, chasing them with what Kame could only hope to be sugar. From Ueda and Maru’s glazed looks, Kame was not sure if their minds were still present, or have they already drifted into another dimension.

“KKKKK…..AMMMEEEE….!!!”

A very drunk Koki staggered up and plonked himself next to Kame. He went on to lay his head on Kame’s lap. Kame laughed and weaved his fingers through Koki’s hair.

“What did you drink? And how many did you have?”

“Errrrrrrr……I dunno…….maybe 100???” Koki winced and buried his face in Kame’s stomach.

“Kame….you’re my Kame-chan….no one can take you away…..Kame……”

Not particularly understanding what Koki was mumbling about, Kame ran a soothing hand up and down his friend’s back, lulling Koki into a drunken sleep. With Koki snoring a little, lying on his lap, Kame continued to observe the misbehavior before him, as he nursed his third mug of beer. Not accustomed to drinking alcohol as yet, he was starting to feel a little lightheaded, and he felt his uneasiness lift a little.

“Kame…Kame…” someone was whispering his name. He turned his head and found himself face to face with Jin. Kame gave Jin a bright smile, which Jin returned with his signature smirk.

“Ssshhh….don’t wake Koki,” Kame gestured to the sleeping figure.

“Ahhh…..” Jin nodded in acknowledgement, “why aren’t you drunk, or high, or surrendering to illegal temptations yet?”

Kame shrugged, “No one’s trying to influence me yet. Maybe because I’m the youngest here tonight.

“Well, let me try then. Wanna go somewhere with me?” Jin leaned in and whispered into Kame’s ear. Kame nodded. He stood up gingerly, moving Koki’s head and lying it gently on the cushioned seat.

“Let’s go.”

***

Jin led Kame to a private room to the back of the club. Kame walked in and took in the deep red and black décor. The room seemed to be decorated to suggest all the things that were bad in the world. He caught sight of Yamapi and Nishikido Ryo at the far end of the room, smoking and chuckling with two girls that were in their company. As soon as they spotted Jin and Kame, they stood up with their companions in hand, and left the room, giving Jin a wink, and Kame’s shoulder a pat. Kame felt a little oozy in the pit of his stomach.

“Come. Sit.” Jin patted the seat next to him, and Kame did as he was told. Slightly jittery, Kame poured himself a mug of beer from the jug on the table and took a big gulp.

"Jin?”

“Yeah?” Jin was rummaging through his pockets for something.

“What are we doing?”

“You’ll see…AH! Found it!” Jin triumphantly waved a packet in front of Kame’s nose.

“What is that?”

Jin took 2 suspicious-looking pills out of the packet, and handed one to Kame. “Here. Take it.”

Kame eyed the pill in his palm skeptically, “Is that what I think it is?”

“Just try it Kame, don’t be such a stiff. I’ll take one with you if it makes you feel better,” Jin giggled and collapsed onto the back of the couch. Kame wondered how many drinks, or other substances Jin has had before this. He sniffed the pill and gave it a little lick.

“Oh, you’re such a pussy! Give it to me!” Jin snatched the pill from him. “Open your mouth and stick out your tongue.” When Kame did so, Jin popped the pill into Kame’s mouth, before doing the same to himself. Kame needed a little beer to wash it down, but Jin just swallowed it.

“Now, you’re ready for part two!”

“Part two?? Jin, what are you up to?” Kame was already beginning to feel the effects of the drug. The colours of the room were getting brighter, and his head was starting to swim.

“You, my dear friend,” Jin inched closer and put his lips to Kame’s ear, “are going to lose your virginity tonight…”

“What?! No way, Jin!” Kame attempted to stand up, but the room spun so badly that he was forced to sit back down.

“You’re such a spoilsport Kame,” Jin cupped Kame’s face with his hands, and used his nose to trace Kame’s jawline. “I’m sure you’ll be fucking good in bed….you just need someone to get you started….”

It must be the drug. Kame was getting high on Jin’s voice, Jin’s closeness, Jin’s touches. He moaned and closed his eyes when he felt Jin’s hands wander from his face into his hair. He could feel Jin’s breath on his lips. Controlled by the drug, Kame moved a little to place his lips on Jin’s. Jin, not much more coherent, welcomed Kame’s lips. Their kiss progressed quickly into a war with their tongues, tasting more of each other, eating each other out. Kame’s hands slithered their way under Jin’s shirt and grazed his nipples. Jin moaned and pressed his lips further into Kame’s. Jin’s hand moved to feel Kame’s awakened erection through his jeans.

“Fuck! Feels…hnn….so…good."

“Are you ready, Kazuya?” Jin breathed.

“Hmmmmm…” Kame sighed as Jin released him onto the sofa. Kame whined a little at the loss of warmth from Jin’s body. He thought he heard his friend stagger to the door of the room. Before he knew what was happening, a soft body, very unlike the one that was on him earlier, was enveloping him, removing all his clothes. He winced as soft tiny hands roamed his chest, twisting his nipples. It felt good, and weird at the same time. His eyelids were heavy from the drug, but he forced them open. What on earth was going on?

A soft mouth engulfed his length and Kame jolted up even as his eyes flew open. He looked down and saw a girl, not much older than he was giving her full attention to his appendage. He wanted to push her off, but it felt oh-so-good. The tingling that coursed through him amplified when he heard a manly groan to his right. He turned his head to see that Jin was getting the exact same treatment. Something bubbled within him, and in his drug induced haze, he wanted to push that girl off Jin and take over. However, before he could do anything, Jin let out a guttural moan just when Kame’s girl snuck a finger up his crack. Kame arched at the sensations, scaling a high as the girl found that sweet spot. Meanwhile, Jin had taken control of his girl and inserted himself in her, rocking back and forth, making sexy noises that caused Kame’s pulse to throb painfully.

“Do…hnnn….do….it….with…..ahh…me….Kauya….” Jin turned a glazy pair of eyes to him.

Something in Jin’s voice made Kame’s lower half burn with even more desire. Not being in very much control of his mind, Kame acceded to Jin's request. He flipped his girl over, and plunged himself between her willing legs. She hissed a little, but Kame did not hear it. He was engulfed in the sounds of Jin’s sex cries and lost in Jin’s bright hazel eyes that were at the moment filled with animal lust as they locked with Kame’s. They both moved in sync, hearing and seeing only each other, oblivious to the soft bodies under them.

All too soon, their young bodies reached their peaks almost simultaneously, and collapsed on top of their respective willing partners, surrendering to the effects of the drugs, and blacked out into oblivion.

***

New Year’s Day 2008

The Countdown telecast was tradition, and it was exactly how Jin remembered it. Tradition. How hard was it to break tradition? Not very, thought Jin bitterly. Take earlier today for example. In his years as a Junior, every year, a senpai would open up his house for the guys who wanted to hang out before the Countdown, and Jin and Kame would always make it there. They would hang out with their senpais and their peers, playing cards, whiling away the time, always having fun. This year, it was Maru who volunteered his place. The first change – since when were they senpais already? Time has indeed flew by.

Jin rocked up to Maru’s apartment alone. He paused for a moment outside the front door, feeling the empty space next to him, a space that used to be taken up by Kame. Jin had not seen Kame much lately. At first, Jin was busy with Yukan Club, and now that the drama had wrapped, Kame was busy filming his own drama series. The only times Jin had seen his distant friend were during the recordings of Cartoon KAT-TUN, of which Kame just zipped in and out, at the taping of the Keep the Faith PV, of which Kame hardly spoke to him, choosing to stay close to Koki, or drift off into a world of his own, and at the various appearances on music shows to promote their song. During those times, Kame would leave even Koki and PR with the industry bigwigs. Jin shook his head, this Kame was a far cry from the shy Kame that he once knew.

And yet, he hoped to see him. He hoped that when Maru opened the door, he would see Kame there. It did not matter if Koki was there too, he just wanted to see Kame for more than 5 seconds. Maybe even talk to him. But it was not to be. Maru had perhaps sensed it, because the minute Jin scanned the room, Maru informed him that Kame and Koki were not there. They were having dinner with the Kamenashi family before the Countdown, something they did last year as well, when Jin was away. “Oh,” was all Jin could say as he dragged his feet into Maru’s apartment. So Kame had made a new tradition with Koki, it was that simple.

Now, after Countdown, they were all at the club. Yet another tradition. Jin sat by the bar, nursing a whisky, reminiscing the days of his youth where whisky would not have been his only poison of choice. A young lady came round and draped her arm around his shoulder. He let her, savouring the soft nibbles she was applying on his neck.

“Some things never change, huh?”

Hearing that familiar sarcastic voice, Jin moved the lady off him and swiveled his chair around. He leaned back, placed his elbows on the bar and smirked at the man before him. Jin has had just enough alcohol to feel less melancholy than he did earlier that evening.

Slightly uncomfortable with Jin’s obviously alcohol-induced light attitude, Kame pursed his lips into a thin line as he often did when he was mildly annoyed but did not want to show it.

“I’m not here to flirt with you Jin.”

“What is it, then? You want to present me with a pill, just like what I did all those years ago?”

Kame wished he could smack that arrogant face in front of him. Now was not the time to drag up old memories, especially those that he had buried in the recesses of his mind. With those words, Jin unleashed those thoughts in Kame again. It was that night, that night that Kame knew he could never be with a woman, it was that night, even though it took him another year to realize it, that he saved his heart for Jin. But no, it was not something to remember.

Instead, he chose to ignore Jin’s comment, “We have the filming of the PV on the 3^rd, so I’m here to tell you not to give in to too much revelry. We can’t afford for you, or anyone, to be out of sorts on that day.”

“But you only chose me to tell, because I’m the one that will most likely get into this mischief that you’re talking about, right?”

Kame shrugged, “If the shoes fit…..”

At that moment, Jin saw a flash of red, and his blood hit boiling point. Who was Kame to presume such a thing of him, even though there might be some semblance of truth? And even so, who was Kame to him that he should listen?

“You might be the boss of everyone, Kamenashi, but you’re not the boss of me, “ Jin retorted through gritted teeth before pulling the female body close to him, and proceeded to ravish her, but not before giving Kame a look of absolute defiance and contempt.

“I don’t give a fuck what you do during your personal time Akanishi. But if it hurts KAT-TUN, you’re going to have to pay.” With that, Kame spun on his heels and left, trying with all his might to ignore the cesspool forming in his stomach.

***

Koki heaved a sigh of relief at the sight of his boyfriend slumped over a table all alone in a private room. He had been looking for Kame everywhere. Usually, Kame was not too hard to find. Kame had always maintained that he was too responsible to indulge in such debauchery, and would be in a corner with older senpais who had already been-there-done-that, tapping on their words of wisdom while his peers got wasted. Koki shook his head and sat next to Kame. Kame had given him specific instructions not to get too intoxicated, with alcohol or otherwise, but here Kame was, obviously high on something.

“Kame-chan? Sweetheart?” Koki prodded Kame carefully.

“Oh God, Koki….ssshhh……not so loud…..” Kame cracked open an eye and winced from the light.

“What did you have?” Koki pulled Kame up into a sitting position, only to have Kame’s head loll onto his shoulder.

“Many many many shots of tequila, and a pill or two, whatever the pills were.”

Koki marveled the way Kame could think somewhat clearly and make sensible sentences even in this state.

“What happened? You’re not normally like this….”

Kame shook his head vigorously, indicating either that he didn’t remember, or he was not telling. Either way, Koki felt that they should make their way home soon. Before Koki could suggest it however, Kame had leaned in and captured Koki’s lips in his. Kame’s tongue pushed through and filled Koki’s mouth, causing Koki to gasp at the force. He felt Kame get eager, and his body reacted to it. He kissed Kame back with as much fervor, feeling buzzed himself by the copious amount of drinks he himself have had. After all, they have not been intimate for quite a while, with Kame’s busy schedule and training, which would leave him completely exhausted everyday.

“Koki…..Koki….” Kame murmured, never taking his lips off Koki’s lips, jaw, neck.

“Hmmmm?” Koki responded, loving the way Kame breathed his name.

“Take me home……I want to fuck the night away….take me home, Koki…..”

And so Koki did and they spent the entire night and most of the next day in bed, making love again and again until they blacked out, intertwined in each others arms.
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A/N: It's taken a while hasn't it? I haven't forgotten about this, just that life got in the way. For this chapter, I kinda created my own scenarios of what I imagine life as a Johnny would be like. Hope it's ok, and I think the next chapter will come soon, as I have some ideas hopping around *smile*

[Fan Fic] Supernova - Chapter 4

Sat, 02 May 2009 17:06:31 GMT

Title: SUPERNOVA
Author: blinkbling24
Genre: AU, Angst (a little I think), Sci-Fi (a bit of a cross between X-men and Heroes), Smut (maybe)
Rating: R to NC-17 (to be safe)
Warning: Unbeta-ed, so please excuse accidental grammer and/or spelling errors, if any.
Summary: Akanishi Jin has always been the blue-eyed boy of the Academy. What happens when one day Kamenashi Kazuya joins the folds? What role do they play in each other's lives, and can they use what is given to them to save what they hold dear?
Author's Notes: I am actually a little too busy to embark on another multi-chapter, since my other multi-chapter fic is still incomplete, but the theme of this contest was too good to resist. I'm not sure if I can complete this by the deadline, but I'll try my darnest. If not, I'll pull out and turn this into a non-contest multi-chapter. Hope you guys like it!
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Chapter 4

“Guys, go easy on him ok? He’s new,” Jin beseeched his friends. They had just emerged from the Professor’s quarters after being told the good news and Jin immediately hustled his group of friends into a nearby common room, sans Kame, who had walked ahead. Jin’s celebratory feeling from this long-awaited announcement was mixed with an extreme uneasiness when he saw the displeasure on his friends’ faces when Kamenashi Kazuya was named as part of their team as well. The initial atmosphere of utter glee was replaced with a shroud of resentment. Who could blame them? All of them had to train hard for years for the Professor to deem them fit enough to go on missions, and Kame upset the balance. He was a newbie, and newbies were not supposed to be given the privilege so soon, at least not before arduous training and extreme effort. But Jin felt that he needed to defend Kame somehow. Kame, too, was his friend.

“Precisely because he’s new Jin.” Ueda’s voice was steady, but the rest of him was not. Ueda was flickering in and out, something that he did when he was feeling emotions he could not really get under control. Jin had seen this before, when Ueda once had a huge crush on one for their female senpais but did not have the courage to tell her. This time however, Jin knew that Ueda’s feelings were of an entirely different nature – one of anger and confusion.

“I….I…know we trained all our lives for this, but…….” Jin tried.

“What can he do? He can only GLOW! What use will he be to the team? We have hands, we can hold torches! Bloody glow worm…..” Pi was pacing up and down the room so quickly that he was nothing but a blur.

Jin winced. “It’s the Professor’s decision. The Professor must have his reasons……” he attempted again.

“This Kamenashi kid really knows how to ruin a good moment huh?” Koki said quietly, fist clenched.

“C’mon guys, he’s going to be our team mate, regardless of how we feel, and we need to work together, so how about cutting the kid some slack. It’s not his fault. It’s the Professor’s decision as Jin said,” Taguchi commented kindly, moving over to stand by Jin.

“Thank you,” Jin mouthed to Taguchi.

“Jin, tell me one thing,” Maru finally spoke up. “Why are you defending him? You, out of all of us, had been yearning for this day the most. You, having trained so hard, begged the Professor time and again…..you should be furious! This newbie getting the prize by doing next to nothing…..Aren’t you even a tad bit upset that this supposed momentous occasion is marred by the appointment of the kid into the mission ranks?”

Not knowing what to say, Jin stared at his feet, even as his mind fiddled with the pen on the opposite desk, rolling it this way and that.

“He’s coming,” Koki’s bionic hearing picked up the sound of Kame’s footsteps, “Jin, don’t expect any of us to be nice to him. Not now, not anytime soon.”

The footsteps got louder, even Jin could hear them now. Jin shuffled uncomfortably at the hostile environment of the room. In his mind, he willed Kame not to come in. He did not want to subject Kame to the hostility. Jin felt that Kame did not deserve it. The Professor’s decision was not something Kame, or anyone, had control over. But of course, Kame was not a mind reader, not that Jin knew of anyway. A few minutes later, the knob of the door turned, and Jin walked up to it, as though he could protect Kame just by standing next to him.

Kame opened the door confidently, his right hand balancing a big white box, with a smaller white box on top of it. Jin heard a low growl coming from Ueda’s direction and he cringed.

“K..kame, let’s go somewhere to celebrate, just the 2 of us,” Jin tried to usher Kame out of the room, but Kame would have none of that. He smiled his beautiful smile at the 5 other guys in the room.

“Why should we, Jin? It’s a celebration for everyone. I flew to town and bought a whole strawberry shortcake for us to share. And I bought a couple of smaller slices without whipped cream for Koki. You don’t like whipped cream, right Koki-kun?”

There was silence after Kame’s words. The tension in the room was so thick that it could be sliced with the funny-looking cake knife that was also on top of the box Kame was holding. Jin glanced at Kame quizzically. How can Kame be so unfazed? Surely he could not so clueless to not know that he was not welcomed at that moment. Kame continued smiling, walked towards the huge mahogany desk in the room, and placed the boxes on it. With calm movements, Kame proceeded open up the big box and began slicing, all the while seemingly oblivious to the situation.

As Kame sliced the cake with slow precision, something in the air suddenly shifted. It was as though the tension melted away. Jin, stiff in a stance that was ready to run to Kame at any threat from his other friends, found himself relaxing as he watched the expressions on his team mates soften. Koki walked up to Kame, “You got slices for me without the cream?”

“That’s what I said,” Kame beamed, “We ALL should enjoy ourselves tonight.”

“Need help Kame?” Maru volunteered.

“It’s ok, I’m almost done. We get 2 slices each.”

“There’s some disposal plates and cutlery somewhere in this cupboard,” Taguchi started rummaging.

Pi smiled and walked towards the door, “I’ve got some bubbly in my room. I’ll be back in a sec,” And he was, bearing said bottle of champagne.

“Ueda?” Kame had placed the first slice of cake on a plate and offered it to Ueda who was standing at the far end of the room. Jin tensed again as Ueda stared at Kame intently. Kame returned the stare, his bright smile never leaving his face. Jin watched as Ueda’s features twitched into a small grin as he walked forward and accepted the plate.

Minutes later, the champagne was popped and laughter filled the air as Pi grappled with the frothy spillage. Maru poured each of them half a plastic cup full.

“C’mon Jin!” Only when Kame beckoned did Jin realise that he was standing back taking it all in. He smiled at Kame who was holding out a cup to him. That’s right, how could anyone stay mad at Kame, a person so warm and generous. Jin joined his friends, his family, and took the cup from Kame.

“Let’s toast to the occasion. May we watch each other’s back and have many adventures together!” Jin raised his cup, and the others cheered along with him, and Jin was happy.

***

“Well done, my son.”

“Thank you.”

“But things have to move faster.”

“I know.”

“You know our plans. Be ready for it.”

“I will.”

“Kazuya.”

“Yes, mother?”

“Bind Akanishi Jin to you.”

“It will be done.”

***

A soft knock snapped Kame out of his trance. He uncrossed his legs and slid off the bed. He walked towards the door and placed his mouth near the frame.

“Who is it?”

“It’s me. Jin. Who else comes to your room?”

“Since when do you knock so gently?”

“Oh, open up already.”

Out of habit, Jin immediately headed to Kame’s bed and sat down on it when he was let in. Kame lingered a little at the door before joining Jin. They sat side by side, their backs to the wall that the bed was flushed against. Kame’s head was hurting, and he moved his hand up to pinch the top of his nose, between the eyes.

“Headache?”

“Yeah.”

“Come. Let me.”

Jin placed both his hands on Kame’s temple and began to move his fingers in circular motion. Kame closed his eyes and relaxed the best he could. He felt Jin’s warm breath tickle his face. He felt it on his eyelashes, his nose and his lips. The scent of Jin distracted Kame. He felt the tension uncurl within him as he leaned deeper into the wall, his body getting heavier, against his will.

Kame’s breathing was getting slower, Jin noticed. He smiled when he saw the frown lines that seemed to be a permanent fixture on Kame’s brow smooth out. Kame had flawless skin, almost translucent. Jin resisted the impulse to run the back of his hand across Kame’s cheek. Instead, he focused on his task, trying to avoid staring at the slightly parted, perfect pair of lips that looked so inviting.

“Jin?” Kame murmured without opening his eyes.

“Feels good, doesn’t it?”

“Mmm…” Kame agreed with a smile and Jin thought that Kame should smile more often, “But Jin….”

“Yes Kame?”

“Aren’t you upset with me? Isn’t it unfair that I got placed in a mission group after only being here a few weeks?” It was something Kame did not quite understand about Jin. He had expected some form of resentment, and was prepared for that. But not this.

Jin pondered for a bit, before answering, “You know, I should be more upset, but I’m not.”

“Why?” Kame, with eyes still closed, sighed his question. With the comfort of Jin’s presence, he suddenly felt tired.

“I’m not entirely sure,” Jin, seeing Kame relaxing even more, placed more pressure on Kame’s temple, “I’m simply content that my turn has finally come, and that all my friends are beside me. Including you Kame. I’m happy that you’re part of the team. It feels complete, somehow, that you’re in this with me…..we’ll do great together…it’s…we…..mesh well…..I can’t really explain it….. It just feels right….” The hands on Kame’s temple stopped moving.

“It does?” Kame finally opened his eyes and found himself looking into Jin’s deep brown ones, so bright and earnest, drawing him in, making him almost believe in Jin’s words.

There they were again, caramel, molten, and if Jin let himself be pulled further into the intense gaze, he could see flecks of gold that made Kame’s eyes seem magical. Jin could never feel uncomfortable gazing into those eyes, eyes that reminded him of a long-forgotten warmth of home, yet tinged with a mystery that Jin hoped to uncover.

Their eyes locked together powerfully; neither of them had the strength to disengage, although Kame a greater need to do so. He tried with all the energy his tired self could muster, but it was almost useless. Jin, his eyes, his breath, his very presence was Kame’s distraction, causing Kame to lose focus. It was something Kame could not afford, not now, not ever, and yet, he wanted to let go, but he couldn’t, he couldn’t.

Something is Kame’s mind flickered.

I will not tolerate weakness, Kazuya.

I AM NOT WEAK.

Their gaze ended with Kame closing his eyes again. The frown lines that had disappeared came back in full force. Jin, a little disconcerted, reached for Kame’s temple again, but he was stopped.

“I’m feeling better already,” Kame forced a grin and blinked. The magic was lost.

“Oh, ok,” Not wanting to leave, but not knowing what else to do, Jin got off the bed and walked reluctantly to the door, “Erm….I should leave you then….”

Kame nodded, “Goodnight, J…”

BEEP! BEEP!

The little red buzzer on their floating orbs rang an unfamiliar tune, but one that they immediately recognized.

“Mission!” Jin beamed enthusiastically as he ran out of the room, with Kame following a step or two behind.

***

The members of the new mission team flew swiftly to the scene, with Pi being the first to arrive of course. Just as briefed by Kimura-san, it was a landslide. It appeared that a mountainside town area was suddenly buried under a massive portion of soil, gravel, and natural vegetation that seemed to have loosened due to erosion.

“It’s strange. Usually landslides happen during heavy rainstorms. This one however, happened a couple of minutes ago. It seemed like the side of the mountain just decided to fall apart,” Kimura-san had explained in puzzlement when they had gathered in the control room at the Academy.

“I’ve done the preliminary surveillance of the area while waiting for you guys to get here,” Pi reported as he flew to meet the group as they approached, “the local rescue team are already at work, but with most of the town folk buried under the rumble, it’s an uphill task for them, pardon the bad pun,” Pi grinned weakly.

“What do they need from us?” Taguchi, who was riding on Ueda’s back, asked.

“The town has lost its electricity supply, and the rescue team needs to power up their lamps and other equipment….”

“Roger that,” said Ueda, “I’ll fly Taguchi to their location, and I’ll help them with their search also. Being able to walk through solid walls does have its advantages.”

“Good, we have no time to lose. Lives are at stake,” Jin assumed his role as the natural leader of the group, “Maru, a little help?”

“Sure, Jin, and I’ll be careful not to sweep any humans up along the way,” Maru saluted.

“Right, once Maru summons the winds and rids the area of the sand and what-not, the area would be clear for us to start the rescue. Koki, you’ll team up with Maru and take one area. Use your hearing to listen out for survivors. Kame and I will take another area. Pi, you’ll dart around and be our communication with the local rescue team.”

“Let’s get to it!” The team was pumped for action.

“Watch each other’s backs ok? Ready Maru?” Jin asked.

“Ready!”

“Pi, you’d better go ahead and warn the rescue team of the strong winds that are coming.”

“Yosh!” And Pi was gone just as the beginnings of light breezes that would soon turn to almighty winds that would send the rubble covering the town spiraling away in a well-created tornado.

***

Once again, Jin marveled at Kame who glowed so mystically. Kame was walking ahead of him, lighting almost three-quarters of the entire casualty area, so much so that even team Koki-Maru had light. Team Ueda-Taguchi had the help of the rescue team’s halogen spotlights. Kame, in turn, was amused that Jin could move rubble larger and heavier with his mind than Kame could with his hands. Together, in the span of half an hour, they had managed to rescue almost 100 survivors, mostly family units huddled together in pockets of air in what used to be their homes. Pi helped whisk the survivors to an open area where ambulances were waiting to treat the injured.

Jin watched as his team mates, his friends, bring in their share of survivors. They certainly worked well together. Koki listened out for breath sounds and weak cries for help, and Maru moved rumble with sharp gusts of wind and lightning bolts. Ueda walked through solid matter and found the survivors, while Taguchi used electric currents to turn massive pieces of rock into powder. Pi was quick to in his thinking and movement to prioritise bringing casualties to the medics, and him and Kame worked in quiet synergy, with Kame lighting the way.

It seemed that Kame had the knack for finding survivors. Often times, it was him that pointed out the areas that Jin should start removing rumble. So far, everyone Jin and Kame found were still alive. It made Jin feel relieved that they arrived quick enough, that the people buried below did not run out of oxygen, and that injuries did not have time to get worse. However, at the back of his head, he knew that the deeper into the rubble they searched, the chances of finding survivors diminished. Jin was disheartened at the thought, and his movements became more reluctant even as he recognized the urgent need for speed.

Kame was disheartened as well, but for a totally different reason from Jin. He observed on more than one occasion, how the gratitude in the eyes of the people they rescued changed to something a little more hostile – a look of disbelief that they were being saved by unnatural beings, mutants, that they despised. Kame was disgusted and resented them. How could they be so ungrateful? Maybe they deserved to be buried alive for the prejudice they held against people with powers. Kame felt that people with powers should be respected, and feared even. It was what he was taught to believe.

A gasp made Kame turn in Jin’s direction. The older man was hunched over a pile of rocks, holding on to something that Kame, only when he walked closer, found out was an arm, a stone-cold, grey arm of a teenage girl, not more than 17 years old, that was long dead. Jin reached out to touch the girl’s pale face, one that was so peaceful and unblemished that it looked like she was sleeping. Kame saw tears falling from Jin’s eyes onto the dead girl’s features. Kame felt that he needed to feel something more than indifference, but he did not know what else to feel. Jin’s compassion for humanity, for life, was another thing Kame did not understand.

“Kame, help me!” Jin croaked through his tears.

“Why? She’s dead.” Kame almost voiced out, but did not. He silently helped Jin move the heavy beam that was across the girl’s chest, possibly the cause of her death, crushing her ribs so that the bone shards pierced through her heart. Kame watched as Jin lifted the girl gently into his arms, cradling her as though she was something precious. Jin did not notice that Pi had appeared next to him.

“That’s number 12,” Pi said grimly, “Here, I’ll take her and place her with the others. The families will need to claim them.”

“Jin, give her to Pi. We have to keep working,” Kame spoke gently. Jin nodded and handed the girl to Pi. Pi was gone in a second.

Kame walked ahead, aware that Jin was still affected by their last find. For Jin’s sake, Kame hoped that they would not find any more dead bodies, but it was something he could not control. But there was something he could, and it was at this moment that he had to. Kame led Jin to an unexplored area. It was a cave of sorts, accidently formed while the building crumbled. Kame paused at the entrance, examining the area. He hesitated and closed his eyes for a couple of seconds.

Now.

“Jin, I think there could be people in here!”

Jin pulled himself together. He walked up next to Kame, “We need to save as many lives as we can! Come on!” He grabbed Kame’s arm to pull him along, but Kame stood firm.

“Kame? You coming?”

“Why do you care so much? You don’t even know these people.” Kame had to ask.

“My mother once told me that every time a heart beats is a miracle, and it is also the one thing, super powers or not, that we all share. And in that sense, these people are the same as you and I, and if I am allowed to live to see the sunrise of a new day, they deserve the same privilege.”

Jin walked towards the entrance, moving rocks that blocked his way to the side. Just as he was going in, he turned to Kame, who was standing in the same position, deep in thought, and said, “I also believe that every heartbeat is a second chance for a person to do things right.”

Kame, stunned by Jin’s words, watched speechlessly as Jin disappeared into the cave. It was new information, new insight, something that Kame was never exposed to, and it gave Kame something to process. He wondered if he liked this new perspective, it caused something inside to stir, a feeling he had never felt before.

A small rumble jolted Kame out of his thoughts. Oh no! Jin! Kame ran into the cave and grabbed Jin.

“Kame! What are you doing?”

Not saying a word, Kame spun Jin around and gave him a strong shove. Jin, propelled by the force, stumbled out of the mouth of the cave. He turned and was just about rush back in when his eyes widened in horror.

“KAME!!!”

The last thing Jin saw was Kame’s beautiful eyes dimming as the roof of the cave collapsed on top of him.
-------------------------------------------------------
ARGH!!!!! I DON'T THINK I CAN FINISH THIS IN TIME!!!!!!! But I will, I MUST! :p

[Fan Fic: One Shot] The One With The Ass

Mon, 30 Mar 2009 13:36:48 GMT

Title: The One With The Ass

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame

Genre: Crack, fluff and smut I think? I'm not too good with these genre things.

Rating: NC-17

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: Kame's a little insecure about a certain part of his body.

A/N: I'm incorrigible. I have 2 multi-chapter fics hanging, but I couldn't stop the inspiration for this little one-shot. I watched Jin's Oshareism episode again today, and decided to write. So here's a little something that I pounded out in 2 hours. I warn you though, it's not as tight as I would like, and not entire thought through, so it might be a little jerky in parts.
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The One With The Ass

Kame never really liked being in Jin’s apartment, not that he was about to express his detest to Jin. Perhaps detest was too strong a word, but he would avoid going to Jin’s apartment at all cost. He wondered if Jin noticed, but then again, this was Jin, whose mind usually did not register properly when ambushed by heavy flirtation and promises of wanton sex. Or so Kame thought.

It was after one of those painful Myojo/Duet/Wink Up photoshoots. Jin could not tell the difference anymore. They all merged into one big blob of inconvenience, and he just wore, stood and did as he was told without argument just to get it over and done with. Why couldn’t Johnny collapse all the titles into one big magazine, he owned them all anyway. Jin yawned and stretched. He had long given up trying to figure out why his big boss did certain things.

As usual, Jin being the lazier, non-fussy one, finished changing out faster than the rest. He paced outside the make-shift tent pitched specifically for their outdoor shoot for Kame. One by one, the other members filed out, giving him painful slaps on the shoulder as a sign of affection before going their own way. Patience thinning, which probably meant that he was more tired than usual as he could normally wait for hours on end, he popped his head through the canvas entrance. Kame was cleaning off the last of his matt foundation, and Jin sighed. This meant that there was still the toner and moisturizer to go. At least Kame had already changed into his own casual clothes.

“Kame, anytime before this century ends please.”

“Give me five more minutes.”

“Five minutes means fifteen.”

“Then go get some takeout. I’m too beat to cook today.”

“I’m too beat to even walk.”

“Jin…..” Kame began to chastise.

“Ok ok, I’ll be back in fifteen. You better be ready.”

***

Exactly fifteen minutes later, Jin came back bearing a paper bag filled with two cups of instant ramen, two onigiris, two chocolate ice-cream cones and separately, a 6-pack of Asahi Extra Dry. As expected, he had to wait another 5 minutes before Kame felt decent enough to emerge into the open. Jin could feel the staff literally sigh with relief as they started to take down the tent.

“For God’s sake, if you’re going to wear that hat and sunglasses, why in the world did you have to take so long? No one’s going to recognize you.”

“It’s called pride in one’s appearance, Akanishi Jin. Not that you know anything about it,” Kame drawled as he settled into the passenger seat of Jin’s car.

“Whatever,” Jin rolled his eyes, put the groceries in the back seat, got into the driver’s side and started the engine.

“Jin, my place is that way,” Kame said as they left the parking lot.

“Your place is an hour’s drive away, and that is if there is no traffic. My place, 10 minutes.”

“We’re going to YOUR place?” Kame panicked.

“Your powers of deduction are spot-on,” Jin voice was tinged with a hint of sarcasm.

Kame knew this tone. This was Jin’s “I’m-tired-don’t-mess-with-me” tone. Jin was dangerous when he had this tone in his voice, and Kame knew better. On any other topic, he knew better. But this, he had to try.

“But the DVD we wanted to watch is at my place.”

“So? There’s a soccer match on TV today anyway.”

“I didn’t bring any change of clothes.”

“Since when were clothes an issue between us? Besides, there’s nothing on our schedules tomorrow. You can afford to wear the same ones. I’ll drive you home in the morning.”

“If you’re going to drive me home tomorrow, you can drive to my place now. It’ll be more comfortable, and you have clothes there. We’re more used to my place.”

“YOU’RE used to your place. I like my place. That’s the reason I rented it. Even though I enjoy the times I hang out with you in your apartment, I’d like to know where things are for a change. And, I miss my surround sound system.”

“If we go to my place, I could cook. I’ve got pasta.”

“You said you were tired. I bought food. I may not have a fully functioning kitchen, but I do have a kettle to boil water.”

“But instant food is so bad for you.”

“I’ve eaten worse.”

“But….”

Jin stopped at a red light. He turned and faced his lover.

“Kamenashi Kazuya. Why are you fighting me?”

Kame bit his lip. He could not possibly say it, but he was going to make one last ditch attempt.

“I’m not fighting you, baby,” he breathed, “I just had a very hot surprise waiting at my place for you, that’s all.” Kame leaned over and nibbled Jin on the earlobe.

“Oh, really?” Jin whispered.

“Umm…hmmm….” Kame’s lips travelled down Jin’s jaw.

“Well,” Jin murmured, “I think we can do ‘hot’ anywhere….my place included.”

The light turned green, and Jin stepped on the gas. Kame knew he had lost.

“Dammit, I should have driven,” Kame muttered under his breath.

***

Jin eyed Kame discreetly as he prepared their dinner. He had always willingly gone to Kame’s apartment because, well, that was what good boyfriends were supposed to do. He was the one that picked his lover up, and it was only right for him to send his lover home, and go up for sex, as was the way the sequence worked.

However, recently, he had noticed that whenever he mentioned going to his own place for a change, Kame would often come up with elaborate ruses just to avoid it. It was not that Kame had not been to his apartment. Kame had been there maybe three to four times since he moved in. But each time, they did not stay long. Kame would come up with some excuse, such as he thought he left the water running at his place, or the next location shoot was nearer his place than Jin’s, and they would eventually wind up back at Kame’s. Jin was not stupid. He was more observant than what Kame gave him credit for, and he wondered what was really up.

Sitting rigidly on the single white plush sofa in Jin’s tiny one bedroom apartment, Kame’s mind went into overdrive trying to stay calm. His eyes darted everywhere and rested on a certain wall with much disdain before looking away. Jin furrowed his brow as he brought the food and the beer to his, at the moment, very uptight boyfriend.

“Are you uncomfortable?” Jin asked, concerned.

“No,” Kame picked up his Styrofoam bowl of ramen and began blowing at the noodles.

“You sure?”

“Yeah, I’m good,” Kame started eating, one strand at a time.

They ate in silence, with Jin polishing off Kame’s soup base and half his onigiri. Kame finished up his own cone of ice-cream though, chocolate was his favourite. Jin drank the last dredges of beer from his can and snuggled into the sofa. He pulled Kame into a bear hug, and was glad to see Kame give him a warm smile.

Sighing with contentment, Jin said, “Nothing like a full tummy and the company of my Kazu-chan to right my mood.”

Kame sighed in return and snuggled into Jin’s chest.

“The soccer match won’t start till later, so what say we use the time in-between wisely?”

“What do you suggest?” Kame gave Jin a cheeky grin.

“Well, why don’t we start with this?” Jin planted a deep kiss on Kame’s lips. Kame moaned and began to run his fingers through Jin’s thick hair. He made the mistake of opening his eyes. He frowned and tightened his lips.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Was just thinking about work.”

“You’re thinking about work when you’re with me?”

“Well, technically, you’re part of work……”

“Great. I guess I’ll just have to take your mind off things eh?”

“Why don’t you?” Kame issued the challenge and Jin smirked. He brought their lips together again. Kame tried to concentrate, but he could not help cast his eyes on the opposite wall, which caused him to stiffen once again.

Frustrated, Jin pulled away. Remorseful, Kame crouched into the far end of the sofa.

“My place is not good enough for you, is that it?”

“No! Your place is wonderful!”

“It’s too messy?”

“No, I love the mess! It’s who you are!”

“It’s too small? The sofa, the bed, not to your taste?”

“No, and no.” Kame shook his head.

“Then what, Kame?! God! Sometimes I wish I could read your mind!” Jin gritted his teeth.

“It’s….nothing…..just something….stupid. It’s my weird thing really, not your fault….”

“I don’t understand a word you’re saying. Now, calm down and tell me what’s wrong.” Jin knew that he had to take the soft approach for Kame to open up.

“It’s…..that poster.” Kame nodded towards the opposite wall.

“P..poster? What?” Jin turned around to glance at said poster. “The one with the girl’s ass?!” Jin was incredulous.

Nodding, Kame attempted to explain, “You brought that picture onto national television. All of Japan now know you appreciate blond chicks with nice asses, how you said you enjoyed looking at them in LA…….and….” Kame choked on his words. He sounded ridiculous, even to himself.

“It’s for aesthetic purposes for God’s sake! You have similar stylized posters at your place, and you’re giving me grief about this one?!”

“Stop raising your voice at me! I didn’t mean it like that!”

“I can’t believe you’re hung up over a poster!”

“It’s NOT the poster. It’s what it represents…..”

“I told you I DID NOT sleep with anyone in LA! How many times must I tell you this? I thought you trust me!”

“I DO! That…it’s….I……oh man, this is so not going the right way,” Kame buried his face in his hands.

Jin threw his hands in the air, “I can’t believe it! What will you have me do? HUH KAME? Hang a floor to ceiling poster of Kamenashi Kazuya for all to see?!”

“NO OF COURSE NOT! God, that’s not what I meant at all!” Kame heaved his chest, exasperated.

“Then what do you mean? Why can’t you just tell me?” Acknowledging Kame’s distress, Jin inched a little closer to the younger man.

“You’ll laugh.”

Putting his arm around Kame’s shoulders, Jin promised, “No I won’t. Tell me.”

Kame paused for a moment, trying to form the words.

“Her ass,” Kame said barely audibly.

“What about her ass?” Jin looked from Kame to the poster and then back to Kame.

“It’s obvious that you like it. It’s so round and curvy.”

“Well, yes, it is a nice ass. Tthat’s why I put up the poster. It gives a sort of character to the apartment.” Where was Kame going with this? Jin had no clue.

“My ass is nowhere near that.”

Jin blinked. He blinked again. His mind was trying to wrap around Kame’s words. It took him a while to get what Kame was saying, and he had to use all his self control to keep from bursting out in laughter.

“You’re laughing,” Kame remarked, red-faced.

“No, I’m not,” Jin sputtered, shoulders shaking.

“God, I feel like such a girl! Oh, go ahead and laugh! I don’t think I can be any more embarrassed.” Kame groaned and banished his face into the corner of the sofa.

“Since I have your permission….” Jin could not help it. He exploded into his trademark high pitched laugh, holding on to his sides.

It was a long while before Jin got a hold of himself again. Kame sat up when he heard the laughter diminish and looked at Jin with woeful eyes. Jin reached out to Kame, and pulled Kame’s head to his chest.

“Seriously, Kazu-chan,” Jin stroked his lover’s hair, “I never know what goes on in that crazy head of yours. You’re actually insecure because of a poster?!” He bit his lips to refrain from chuckling again.

“I just can’t bring myself to look at it ok? I don’t like it, but I didn’t know how to tell you without sounding mental. Obviously I did sound mental, considering how amused you are.”

Jin kissed the top of Kame’s head, and waited for Kame to continue.

“I imagine you laying on this sofa, facing this nice, plump ass, thinking how much you wished mine was like that, instead of the flat, boney ass that it is.”

“You could consider implants,” Jin joked.

“I did think of it. I just don’t have the time to go for a consult.”

“KAME! I was kidding! And this poster, I only put it up there because it was a gift from Pi, and he insisted.”

“You must think there’s some merit in it, if not you won’t put…mmmf….”

Soft, determined lips landed on Kame’s to silence him. Jin’s tongue quietly urged with its secret password, and Kame opened his mouth to let it roam. The smell of Jin’s breath and the skill of his tongue caused Kame’s bones to grow heavy as he melted into his lover’s arms. Jin slid his hands under Kame’s t-shirt and toyed with his nipples, stroking, teasing, even as he continued to kiss Kame languidly. Soon, Kame was purring, and breaking the kisses to whisper Jin’s name.

Taking advantage of Kame’s now putty-like body, Jin took off Kame’s clothes, jeans and boxers included, and allowed Kame to flop on the sofa. Jin smirked his signature smirk as he took in his beautiful naked boyfriend before him. He kissed Kame’s juicy lips and gripped Kame’s half-erect cock in his hand. He pumped slowly, up and down, using his thumb to occasionally brush the sensitive tip. Jin’s lips moved downwards to suckle Kame’s neck as his movement grew faster in response to Kame’s hardening cock. He handled Kame gently but firmly, and after a few sensuous breaths of “Oh, Jin”s, Kame came, shuddering.

Kame opened his glazed eyes as he watched Jin lovingly cleaning his stomach with a wet towel. He pulled Jin in for a deep kiss. Jin rubbed his nose against Kame’s, and flipped Kame over. Kame was now facing that dratted poster, and he tried to protest, “Akanishi Jin, that….”

“Ssshhh…..” Jin hushed as he covered Kame’s back with his own body, now devoid of clothes. Jin kissed the nap of Kame’s neck and trailed, with his tongue, down Kame’s spine, slowly, torturingly. Kame eyes closed with pleasure, and his mind emptied, even the offending image was disappearing. Jin’s kisses stopped at the point where Kame’s back curved perfectly with his ass. Jin rested his head in that curve and used his index fingers to circle the cheeks, stroking, caressing.

“How can I not love this ass?” Jin whispered as he licked the top of the crack.

“I love that it’s rosy and supple,” Jin blew raspberries on each cheek, and Kame giggled.

“I love that it’s flawlessly smooth,” Jin stroked the length of the crack, and Kame instinctively lifted up.

“I love its slick velvety nature,” Jin licked two fingers and inserted them into Kame’s opening, and Kame groaned.

“I love its sweet musky taste,” Jin licked and sucked, making Kame writhe and hoist up even higher.

“Jin…please……”

“And most of all, I love,” Jin positioned himself, his own cock hard and ready, “how it welcomes me,” Jin inserted his tip, and Kame hitched his breath.

“Everytime….allowing me to lose myself as I fuck you, my love,” Jin thrust slowly at first, picking up speed as Kame emitted lustful moans, telling Jin to go faster, harder.

“How its walls grip me until….” Jin’s voice was straining with effort now, “I feel pleasure beyond anything I have ever known.” Jin hugged Kame tightly as he came, and Kame savoured the warmth within him.

***

“So, whose ass do I love best?” Jin asked after a second round with Kame being on top this time.

“Mine, I suppose,” Kame admitted, with a little reluctance.

The tone in Kame’s voice caused Jin to let out a big sigh. He untangled himself from his lover’s arms, got up, walked towards the wall, took down that troublemaking poster, tore it in half, then in quarters, walked towards the kitchenette, and chucked the pieces into the bin.

“Happy now?”

“Yes.” Kame beamed.

Jin took Kame in his arms and gave him a hug.

“Now, if Your Majesty would allow it, the soccer match is about the start.”

[Fan Fic] Supernova - Chapter 3

Thu, 26 Mar 2009 09:25:10 GMT

Title: SUPERNOVA
Author: blinkbling24
Genre: AU, Angst (a little I think), Sci-Fi (a bit of a cross between X-men and Heroes), Smut (maybe)
Rating: R to NC-17 (to be safe)
Summary: Akanishi Jin has always been the blue-eyed boy of the Academy. What happens when one day Kamenashi Kazuya joins the folds? What role do they play in each other's lives, and can they use what is given to them to save what they hold dear?
Author's Notes: I am actually a little too busy to embark on another multi-chapter, since my other multi-chapter fic is still incomplete, but the theme of this contest was too good to resist. I'm not sure if I can complete this by the deadline, but I'll try my darnest. If not, I'll pull out and turn this into a non-contest multi-chapter. Hope you guys like it!
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Chapter 3

“Kazuya.”

“Yes, I’m here.”

“I hope you are settling in well.”

“Well enough.”

“Remember your mission Kazuya. Stay close to Akanishi Jin. I trust you will not let us down.”

“Understood.”

“Kazuya.”

“Yes?”

“Make me proud, my son.”

“I will, mother.”

***

Kame liked the quietness of the night, when everything just stopped. It made it seem like he was the only one that existed in the world. Being alone gave him a false sense of comfort. To him, it meant no responsibility, no commitment. He was only accountable to himself, he could do what he wanted without a thought for anyone around him.

Slipping out, Kame took flight and landed in a tiny woodland area not far from the Academy. The night air was crisp and the sky was clear, moonless. Kame walked on the grassy patch, hearing the crunch of dead leaves underfoot. He stilled his mind and heart, something he had to do often, consciously. It was crucial for Kame to be in control of himself, he needed to make very measured, calculated moves. It was his nature, what was required of him.

Nearby, Kame heard faint noises, grunting noises. At first, he thought it might be a wild animal, but then, it did not make sense. He did not think there were any bears or wolves in this part of the world. He walked towards the sounds, and as he got closer, he knew that it was definitely a human. He hovered over some low bushes, and spied the person in the clearing ahead. This person was standing a distance in front of a massive boulder about 3 storeys in diameter. The person emitted a very pained and constipated sound, as though he was trying to move something too heavy for him. Kame’s eyes adjusted to the darkness and realised who the person was.

“Jin?”

Jin jumped in surprise, hitting a tree branch 2 metres above him. He landed with a thud, and sat on the ground, rubbing the fast-growing bump on his head.

“Oh my God! Are you alright?” Kame zipped over and landed by Jin’s side.

“Kame?! You scared the shit out of me! What are you doing out at night? How did you get past the security system?”

“Do you have a concussion? Maybe you should lie down.” Kame fussed over Jin, urging Jin to lie back on the grass. Jin resisted and looked at Kame with curious eyes. Kame stared at Jin, and smiled.

“How did YOU get past the security system? Being friends with Taguchi must have its advantages huh?”

“Err…I…..hmmm….”

“Well, if you’re not going to tell me your way, I’m not telling you mine.”

Jin chuckled, “Fair enough. I think I’m good to stand up now.”

Shakily, Jin managed to stand on his two feet with Kame’s help. He brushed himself off more violently than necessary. Kame stood aside and watched in amusement. His amusement turned to puzzlement as Jin looked like he was searching for something.

“Lost something?”

“Yes, my watch!” Jin sounded mildly panicky. He went down on all fours and began to feel the ground frantically for it. The surroundings were dark, and Jin feared that he would never find it. Suddenly, a warm glow brightened up the entire clearing. He stopped his scramble for a minute, awestruck by the sight of Kame glowing. Kame’s skin already had a translucent, flawless quality about it, but when he used his powers to glow like that, he almost seemed angelic, and Jin was unknowingly enthralled.

“Told you I was useful in such situations,” still glowing, Kame went on his hands and knees and helped Jin in his search.

“Thank you…” began Jin.

“Don’t thank me yet. I haven’t found it for you.”

They searched side by side in silence. Jin enjoyed Kame’s presence, and it helped ease the ill feeling from the thought of never seeing that watch again.

After a long while, Jin let out a resigned sigh, “Kame….let’s give up. I must have flung it way over this clearing when I jumped. It’s gone now.

The look in Jin’s eyes told Kame that this was something important to Jin.

“No.”

“What?”

“No. You can go. I’m still looking.”

“Why?”

“Because there’s no “us”. It’s only “you” and “I”, and I want to keep looking. I don’t know about you, but I don’t give up easily.”

Taken aback by Kame’s unexpected resolute tone, Jin bent down and resumed the search.

An hour passed. Jin was, once again, ready to give up. He was just about to shout out to Kame, who was on the other side of the clearing, when, “I FOUND IT!” Kame removed his hand from under some shrubbery, and held up the watch.

Kame flew to Jin’s side. He handed over the watch, a well-worn old-fashioned piece that seemed out of place with Jin’s trendy look. He observed how Jin touched the watch’s face gently before slipping it on carefully.

“It’s old.” Kame commented.

“Yes, it’s old. Older than I am, actually.”

“Then why the panic?” There were not a lot of things Kame did not understand, but how Jin treasured the watch was something Kame could not comprehend. Kame never treasured anything his whole life. He did not know how it felt like to have something dear.

Jin’s lips curled in a wistful smile, and Kame felt a slight compulsion to hug him. The compulsion unnerved Kame a little, and he told himself to pull back. Jin sat down on the grass, and Kame followed suit.

“It was my father’s, or at least that’s what my mother told me. She handed this watch over to me before she died,” Jin laughed lightly at the memory, “She probably thought that a watch was an appropriate gift for someone who time travelled.”

“I know,” Kame muttered softly.

“You know?” Jin turned to face him.

“I mean, from what you just said, I know why it’s so precious.”

Jin shrugged, “I don’t know why I keep it though. I didn’t know my father at all. But I guess it’s just nice to have something of him with me. I’ve never seen him, not even in my travels to the past.”

Trying to change the subject, Kame asked, “What are you doing here so late at night?”

“I could ask you the same thing.”

It was Kame’s turn to shrug, “I just wanted to be alone."

“The first week of being surrounded by idiots too much for you eh?” Jin joked.

“Maybe,” Kame raised an eyebrow, “you?”

“See that boulder there?” Jin nodded towards the gigantic mass, “I told myself that if I could finally move that, I would leave the Academy. I can’t quite yet, but one day, I will.”

“You want to leave the Academy?”

“Surprised? I’m indebted to the Professor, he saved me from the people who hunted me after all. But I’ve always felt that there’s something out there waiting for me. I don’t want to be tied to anything. I think I need the freedom to be myself, to live, to love, something like that.”

Freedom. An idealistic notion. Kame did not think that freedom existed. Being free from something means being trapped by something else. But Kame humoured Jin.

“You don’t think you’re given enough freedom at the Academy? Is the Professor really that protective?” Kame questioned on the pretext that he was the newbie.

Jin shook his head, “That’s not it. I’m sure the Professor cares for each one of us and lets us decide for ourselves. In fact, it is often our choice to stay with him, to help. But, there is a difference between being given the freedom and being well and truly free.”

Now, Kame was curious. He had never met such a pure-hearted individual.

“Jin, there are people out there who hate people like us, who would hurt us at any cost…..”

“I know that.”

“And you want to leave your safe-haven to be forever on the run, hiding, escaping?”

It was not something Jin had thought much about. He had always been focused on this single thing that he wanted.

“It’s the only thing I’ve ever wanted that is possible, that is within my reach.”

The pining tone when Jin said those words, and the sudden change in Jin’s eyes threw Kame through a loop. What was this “want” that Jin was talking about? Kame had never wanted anything in his life. He did not know that he was allowed to want, to yearn, to aspire. He had been taught that his sole purpose in life is to follow orders clinically, and to perfection.

“I’ve never told anyone this though, so please, don’t tell the others. I don’t even know why I told you. Maybe you’re new, and our friendship is a clean slate. Kame, can I trust you?”

Once again, where was this “our” and “us” coming from? To Kame, there was no such thing. “Yes, you can.” No you can’t.

***

Their encounter in the woods seemed to have given Jin the license to intrude on Kame’s privacy whenever he liked, much to the younger man’s annoyance. But Kame knew that he could not hold it against Jin, it was who Jin was. Warm, where Kame was cold. Full of dreams, where Kame had none. It was just that it was now all the more difficult for Kame to be alone, something that was a necessity for him.

Kame had just escaped into the confines of his room after a long day of class and training when he heard an insistent knock on his door. Kame sighed and walked towards the door. He hardly had the door ajar before Jin pushed his way in and flopped on the bed, destroying the perfect, crease-free sheets.

“Kame, what are you doing here all alone?”

“If you remember, Jin, I like being alone sometimes.”

“Ah, that’s right.” Instead of taking the hint, Jin laid back, put his hands behind his head and closed his eyes.

Shaking his head, Kame sat at his desk and pulled out a book. He told himself that it was because of his orders that he tolerated Jin’s intrusion. Unbeknown to himself, he actually enjoyed Jin’s company.

About half an hour passed in silence. Kame closed his book and got out of his chair. He startled a little. He had forgotten that Jin was in his room. He walked up to Jin, who had fallen asleep, and knelt beside the bed. Kame watched Jin’s chest move up and down in a steady rhythm. He examined Jin’s calm features, Jin with his long eyelashes, strong nose, plump lips and structured jawline, thinking why it never occurred to him till now that Jin was heartbreakingly handsome.

Kame pondered how Jin could open up so easily and tell so much of himself to Kame. Kame knew much more about Jin than Jin knew about him, and yet, Jin accepted him wholeheartedly. Kame was taught to be careful all the time, to never trust anyone. In fact, Kame did not think he could even trust himself.

An electronically melodious chime broke Kame’s thoughts. Jin’s eyes snapped open at the sound to meet with Kame’s. Those molten caramel eyes, so mysterious, yet so beautiful at the same time. Looking at them made Jin feel safe, comforted. Kame tried to pull away, but could not. Jin was looking at him with such raw emotion. It was compelling, yet dangerous.

Jin’s stomach growled, and Kame laughed, something that he did not do very often.

“Dinner bell!” Jin exclaimed with what Kame termed Jin’s hunger grin.

“Let’s go before Koki eats up all the meat! It’s barbeque night tonight and Koki tends to gobble up all the prime cuts before they even land on the grill!”

Was this what friendship really was, Kame wondered as he allowed Jin to pull him towards the food hall.

***

“Professor, are you sure about Akanishi? You’ve always been hesitant about sending him out for missions.”

“I can’t shield him from the big bad world anymore. He’s no longer that 8-year-old boy. He needs to learn how to hold his own without the shelter of the Academy.”

What the Professor did not tell his assistant was that he had been disturbed lately by unusual movements he observed in his mind map. He did not know what all of it meant, he did not even know if it was a cause for concern. But things were certainly changing, and he had no doubt it had to do with this very special boy he rescued all those years ago. The Professor recalled how aggressively they had hunted the boy, as though he held a big secret that might unravel something of great importance. All these years, the Professor had been trying to find out why and what, but the Organisation had been clever in covering its tracks.

The Professor had vowed to protect Jin for as long as he can, keeping him out of missions where he could be harmed. It was unlike the Professor to let go of Jin, and he himself was puzzled by the sudden compulsion to do so.

Takuya nodded, “Understood, Professor. Besides, his friends will look out for him. They are a tight bunch.”

“Yes, they will. I’ve grouped them together for that reason. Remember Takuya-kun, they are to be sent on missions as a group, not anyone less. Now, summon them to me and I’ll tell them the good news.”

Just as Takuya was fading away, the Professor called out.

“Oh, and Takuya-kun?”

“Yes Professor?”

“Summon Kamenashi as well.”
------------------------------
Note: Just thought I should explain why my chapters are often so short. I write in between free spurts at work, and because I'm writing against the clock for this contest, I thought I should just post what I can, so that I don't procrastinate, which I tend to do. Sorry that it may seem disjointed and unfulfilling. Bear with me? :)

[Fan Fic] Supernova - Chapter 2

Fri, 20 Mar 2009 06:57:11 GMT

Title: SUPERNOVA
Author: blinkbling24
Genre: AU, Angst (a little I think), Sci-Fi (a bit of a cross between X-men and Heroes), Smut (maybe)
Rating: R to NC-17 (to be safe)
Summary: Akanishi Jin has always been the blue-eyed boy of the Academy. What happens when one day Kamenashi Kazuya joins the folds? What role do they play in each other's lives, and can they use what is given to them to save what they hold dear?
Author's Notes: I am actually a little too busy to embark on another multi-chapter, since my other multi-chapter fic is still incomplete, but the theme of this contest was too good to resist. I'm not sure if I can complete this by the deadline, but I'll try my darnest. If not, I'll pull out and turn this into a non-contest multi-chapter. Hope you guys like it!
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Chapter 2

“Professor.”

“Yes, Takuya-kun?”

“This Kamenashi kid…..”

The Professor waved his hand slightly to cut short what his long-time assistant, Kimura Takuya, had to say. They were in the Professor’s chamber, a huge empty room black walls. This was the place where the Professor exercised his powers. The whole room was like a map of the world, with the walls bearing invisible latitudes and longitudes. The Professor had a profound ability, he was able to detect people with superpowers all around the globe. In his mind’s eye, he saw little lighted flickering dots on the walls like twinkling stars, indicating the exact location of these gifted people. He knew exactly how many gifted people there were, and knew the exact moment someone discovered his or her powers. He knew which of these people were on the move, and which of them stayed put at the same place. If the people are close enough to the Professor’s location, within a certain radius the size of the Asia-Pacific, the Professor would even know their faces, and what powers they possessed.

It was using this ability that led the Professor to many of the cadets in the Academy. He could see them clearly in his mind, and he would identify them, and swoop in to rescue them when they were being attacked or left alone because of their powers, powers that appeared strange and frightening to people who did not have them. He gave the children a home, a place where they were accepted, where they could grow up confident and strong. Or at least, that was what he hoped.

“I suppose you know what you’re doing, Professor.”

“I have work to do. Leave me.”

“Yes Professor,” obeyed Takuya and using his ability, disappeared instantaneously from the Professor’s sight.

Was Takuya right to feel uncomfortable about this Kamenashi kid? The Professor knew that Takuya had his reservations mainly because Kamenashi Kazuya had enrolled into the Academy by himself. No one had done so in the Academy’s history, it was either children the Professor had rescued or parents who, recognizing their child’s potential, sent them to the Academy to be trained. There was also cause to question the Professor’s decision to accept Kamenashi. At 23 years old, he was too old to be accepted as a fresh recruit, and also, he was a mystery, no one knew the extent of his powers, unlike the rest of the cadets who practically grew up and developed their powers together.

But all these were just shallow concerns.

The Professor knew something about Kamenashi Kazuya that nobody else did. In the Professor’s mind map, Kamenashi’s light flickered bigger and brighter than the rest, something that the Professor had not seen before. He did not know what that meant, he did not know how Kamenashi had escaped his radar until now, and he wondered why he could not detect Kamenashi’s full powers. Some of Kamenashi’s ability was fully visible to the Professor, but the Professor suspected that there was more to this Kamenashi kid than meets the eye.

Admittedly, when the boy walked into his office earlier today and asked to enroll in the Academy, the Professor had his reservations. Boys Kamenashi’s age with powers that have not been properly trained usually did not want to be controlled, to be taught. However, as Kamenashi spoke in his gentle voice, the Professor saw the earnest look of a lost child trying to find his identity. And so, the Professor said yes. When Kamenashi requested for Akanishi Jin to be his orientation buddy, the Professor momentarily wondered why, but then, Kamenashi smiled, and the Professor agreed.

Nonetheless, it was better to have an enigma under his roof, rather than running wild outside of it. The Professor made a mental note to keep an eye on this Kamenashi kid. Things were definitely not as simple as they seemed.

***

Jin did not know why he was assigned to be Kamenashi’s buddy. Usually, the task was left to someone more junior. Maybe the Professor thought that since Kamenashi was older than the other juniors, Jin would be more appropriate. But, why did Professor accept someone as old as Kamenashi? It was not something Jin had seen the whole time he has been with the Academy.

Kamenashi was standing outside Jin’s room door at precisely 7am the morning after their first meeting. If Woody had not already told Jin that he had a guest waiting outside, Jin would have gotten a rude shock. He nodded a good morning to Kamenashi and led him to the food hall. Jin threw a quick glance at the person walking quietly beside him and wondered what this guy was all about. Jin had managed to convince himself before he went to bed last night that he was imagining things. This Kamenashi guy could not possibly the boy he saw in the past, and maybe the boy did not even exist even, maybe he had made him all up in his mind. But yet, Jin was still wary of his new friend.

“Akanishi-san.”

Kamenashi’s soft voice snapped Jin out of his thoughts.

“Call me Jin.”

“Jin.” It was the way Kamenashi said his name. Feathery, ethereal, and Jin felt a barely there something that he could not put a finger on.

“Yes, Kamenashi-san?”

“Call me Kame. When we’re more familiar with each other, you can call me Kazuya. For now, it’s Kame.”

Jin smiled despite himself, “And when do you think that will be?”

“I’ll leave it to you to decide, but I’m sure I’ll be happy to hear you call me that when the time comes.”

Was it possible that Jin was beginning to think that this Kamenashi guy was not too bad after all?

“You wanted to know something?” They were almost approaching Jin’s favourite place in the entire Academy.

“I just wanted to say thank you. I know it’s not all that pleasant to play babysitter to the newbie.”

“Nah!” Jin scratched the back of his head, embarrassed that he did indeed think that it was a chore up till that very minute. In fact, if the Professor did not look at Jin so sternly, Jin would have tried to worm his way out of it. “It’s no problem at all. Please, after you.” Jin ushered Kame into the food hall.

All eyes were on Kame as he walked into the hall with Jin. It seemed like all activity stopped for a millisecond before starting up again. Jin paused for a moment to check if the attention fazed Kame at all. Apparently not, thought Jin, as Kame simply followed slightly behind Jin, taking his lead. Jin walked up to his usual table where his friends and 2 trays of cereal, toast and milk were waiting for them.

Taking Jin’s cue, Kame sat next to him at the table. He was greeted with smiles all round and Kame smiled in return. A pixie-like guy broke the silence by extending his hand in greeting, “Very pleased to meet you. We all know you’re Kamenashi Kazuya. I’ll bet you’re dying to know who we are.”

“Call me Kame, please.” Kame took that hand and shook it.

“Kame, this is Ueda Tatsuya,” Jin thought he had better to step up and do his duty, “His abilities include flying, invisibility and walking through solid objects, like walls. Seriously, he is quite true to his powers. Most of the time, we don’t even notice that he’s around.”

“Jin’s an ass, excuse him. My name is Yamashita Tomohisa, but people around here call me Pi, no thanks to the ass sitting next to you. I’m the speed king, I move like the wind, and I fly, of course.”

“Can everyone in this Academy fly?” Kame asked, curious.

“Most of us can,” Kame turned his head to face, across the table, a seemingly scruffy guy around his age with kind eyes. “Hi, I’m Tanaka Koki. Besides flying, I can hear things clearer than anyone here. In fact, if a pin drops in Alaska, I could probably hear it, if I focus hard enough.”

“Show off! Koki talks more than he listens. I’m Nakamaru Yuichi. I fly, and I can control the elements. So if your laundry needs drying, just give me a shout and I’ll command the summer sun for you.”

Laughter filled the air.

“Yeah, who needs a tumble dryer when we have Maru?” remarked a tall man with the widest smile of the group. “Taguchi Junnosuke at your service. I’m one of the more unique ones that can’t fly. I, however, am a human electric current. I can also communicate with technology. I can get you through the most advanced of security surveillance, and hack any super-computer with a simple snap of my fingers.”

“And yet, he spends most of his time dabbling with computer games. Taguchi, I need to talk to you about Woody. He needs more personality.” Jin joked.

“And Jin, what powers do you have?” There it was again, the way Kame said his name.

“Me? Erm…nothing special. I can fly, of course. I move things with my mind, and I sort of time travel, but I suck at that one.”

“Jin does not realise what an extraordinary power he has, to be able to time travel.” Kame looked up to face a very pretty girl who had just draped her arms around Jin and given him a peck on the cheek.

“You’re Kamenashi Kazuya. I’m Haru. Pleased to meet you.”

Everyone kept silent as Kame and Haru engaged in a staring match. Jin looked from one to the other. Kame’s face was a picture of calm, his eyes unblinking. Haru, on the other hand, was frowning, but unwilling to back down.

“Ahem…” Jin cleared his throat to break the tension. “So Kame, what’s your ability?”

Kame broke from Haru’s glare and smiled to the table. Everyone smiled back. “Oh, my abilities are trivial. I can fly like most of you guys. And I glow. Like a glow worm. I’m a human torch, but without the heat, probably only good for camping purposes.”

“Oh, don’t put yourself down like that, Kamenashi-san. Everyone in this Academy is special in their own way. And I’m sure you’ll show us just how special you are. Jin, I’ll see you in class.” With that, Haru spun on her heels and left.

Haru’s words did not seem to affect Kame one bit, Jin observed. However, Jin himself was unsettled. Haru was behaving out of character. Normally, she would be warm and friendly to newcomers. Maybe she felt something about Kame that he could not see. Jin had no time to mull on it. The bell rang to indicate that breakfast was over, and everyone scattered for class.

***

“Haru!”

Haru stopped in her tracks and waited for Jin to walk up to her. She could not help but smile at his cheesy grin as he approached. It was difficult to resist Jin’s goofy charm. She would never admit it to him, but knowing that she felt more for him than him for her made her heart break, just a little.

“Yes, Akanishi Jin?"

“Do I need a reason to walk with the most beautiful girl in the world?” Jin reached out to hold her hand.

There it was again. His charm.

“Where’s your new friend?” Haru asked with caution.

“Kame? In class I suppose. Our schedules don’t really match up.”

“I see.” Focusing on Jin’s eyes, Haru could tell that he liked Kame. She felt friendship, and also a little bit of curiosity, from him.

“You don’t like him.” Jin said as a statement. Haru hesitated. Ever since she had learnt how to control her powers, she also learnt that she was responsible for the feelings of others. She learnt how to be sensitive, to say the right things, to not hurt the other parties’ feelings with what she knew. Jin was someone who valued friendship, and with every friend that he made, it was like an addition to a family he could never have anymore.

Because of that, Haru could not bear to tell Jin that she was uncomfortable with Kame. Her brief encounter with him left her unsettled. She had never experienced what she felt when she tried to sense Kame’s feelings. It was as though it was muted somehow. Kame seemed to have put forth a false feeling, hiding his real one. What frustrated Haru was that she could not be sure, it appeared real, yet not. Until she figured it out, she told herself to be a bit more cautious around Kamenashi Kazuya.

But to Jin, she said, “Of course I like him. What’s not to like? He’s sweet, polite, and handsome in a very delicate way. I just need to get to know him a little better.”

“Good,” Jin nodded, “I like my friends to get along.”

They walked silently, hand-in-hand, down the hall for a couple of seconds, when Jin suddenly paused, “Hmmm…..handsome eh? Not more handsome than me, I hope?”

Haru laughed her melodious laugh, and it always made Jin feel that all was right in the world.
-----------------------------------------
I know I know, this chapter feels very incomplete. But I know some of you have been waiting patiently for me to update, so I thought I'll post up what I have first. I hope Chapter 3 will come to me quicker, so that I can post it up quicker as well.

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 8

Mon, 16 Mar 2009 09:29:48 GMT

Title: Fragments

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame, Kokame

Genre: Angst, Romance, Smut

Rating: NC-17 (As there will be smut in subsequent chapters)

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: In life and love, you can’t have everything that you want, or can you?

Sometime in May 2006, in between Real Face concerts in Tokyo

“KAME! Wait up!”

Kame stood still, turned around and waited for Jin to catch up, grinning at the ridiculous spectacle before him in the meantime.

Jin, in all his superstar camouflage glory, complete with skull cap and sunglasses, was struggling with his hands full of grocery bags. Giant vegetable produce in all shapes and sizes were sticking out and protruding awkwardly, giving Jin an even harder time than it normally would have been.

“Wipe that cheeky grin off your face! I signed up for dinner, not the errand boy job position!” Jin huffed and puffed when he finally caught up.

“Well, you have to sing for your dinner, so to speak. I’m doing the cooking, so this is the least you could do,” Despite his teasing tone, Kame was in fact excited by the prospect of cooking for Jin. He had recently discovered his passion for it, and would like to share it with his friend.

“This is really not how you treat a guest, Kazu-chan,” Jin whined and adjusted the bags in his right hand.

“Oh, stop whining! It’s barely 100 metres to my place. Besides, you should feel honoured. You’re the first person to sample my cooking.”

“I’m your guinea pig you mean.”

“Pig would be right,” Kame shouted over his shoulder as he walked ahead, leaving Jin to trudge grudgingly behind.

***

The sizzling of food hitting the hot oil in the frying pan, followed closely by a delectable garlicky scent that permeated the air motivated Jin to get up from the couch and walk a couple of steps to the kitchen area of Kame’s modest apartment. He paused at the sight of his friend in a slightly feminine apron (admittedly, anyone who wears an apron would appear somewhat feminine) and thought how cute Kame looked. Jin knew that if the millions of fangirls could see what he saw at that moment, their wombs would throb with a painful compulsion to bear Kame’s child.

He trundled over to where Kame was by the stove and poked his nose where it did not really belong.

“What are you cooking?"

“Fried rice.”

“FRIED RICE? That’s all? I was expecting a feast fit for royalty, judging from all the bags of groceries you made me carry! Even pasta would be better than fried rice,” Jin jested.

“Oh shut up. Let’s see you cook then.” Kame said calmly. Jin could never get the better of him.

Unable to think of a better comeback, Jin settled on pouting.

“Why don’t you make yourself useful by setting the table? I’m almost done.”

Jin obediently did as he was told, and soon Kame was serving him piping hot fried rice that looked and smelt absolutely scrumptious. Kame pulled up a chair next to Jin, “Tuck in. Tell me what you think.”

Without a moment’s hesitation, Jin dipped his chopsticks into the huge mound that Kame had dished out for him and shoveled copious amounts into his mouth.

“How is it?” Kame asked apprehensively.

“Mmmf…mmmf…” Jin muffled with his mouth full, spewing more than a couple of rice grains onto table.

Kame laughed, “Comprehensibly please.”

Jin chewed earnestly and swallowed loudly before speaking, “It’s really good!”

“You’re not just humouring me are you?”

Jin shook his head and shoved more rice down his throat. It did not matter if there were much better fried rice to be found in Chinatown. To Jin, what Kame, his dearest friend, had cooked for him was the most delicious fried rice he had ever eaten, even if it was a little bland, and lacked that slightly burnt taste of the professional Chinese wok. Kame made it, and ingesting it warmed Jin’s heart even as it filled his tummy.

Soon, Jin emptied his bowl and asked for more. Kame obliged and served him a second helping. Jin took several more mouthfuls before belatedly noticing something. He stopped mid-shove and looked at Kame, who was observing him with amusement.

“Why aren’t you eating?”

“A cook never really eats his own food.”

“Kame……you need….”

“Oh, stop nagging. I’m not hungry now. The fried rice is all for you. I have an onigiri in the fridge. I’ll eat later.”

“You’re sure?” Jin cocked an eyebrow.

“I’m sure,” Kame nodded.

Kame watched as Jin scoffed down his food. He could not be sure if Jin was putting on an act, he could not be sure if his fried rice was really that yummy, but he could not help but beam happily at the sight of his dearest friend eating what he had cooked.

***

3^rd week of October 2007, recording of Cartoon KAT-TUN with Horikita Maki

“You’re in a good mood,” Ueda keenly observed Kame whistling in the dressing room, getting powdered up for the cameras.

Koki bounded up and ruffled Ueda’s hair, before stating plainly, “He’s pleased because he gets to flirt with Horikita Maki today. He’s been grinning like that since he got up this morning.”

“BAKA! I just styled my hair!” Ueda exclaimed before proceeding to examine himself in the mirror to maneuver his hair back into place.

Kame spun around in the make-up chair and shot Koki an innocent look, “What? She’s a friend. And besides, I haven’t seen her in AGES.”

Unconvinced, Koki frowned. He sat next to Kame and quietly applied his 3-in-1 foundation. Ueda nudged Kame and nodded towards the silent Koki. Kame sighed.

“Koki?”

“Yeah?”

“Jealous?”

“No.”

“Why shouldn’t he be jealous? She’s cute. And everyone appreciates cute.” Maru’s insensitivity was honed to perfection. Ueda swatted him on the head.

“OW! WHAT DID I DO?”

“Just shut up and get started on your make-up.”

It was Koki’s turn to sigh. He muttered something under his breath as his smeared hair gel onto his hands. Kame got up and took Koki’s hand in his. He transferred the hair gel onto his own hands and began to help Koki style whatever strands of hair he had.

“What did you say, Koki?”

“Nothing.” Koki slapped a cap on his hair, back to front.

“Koki…tell me…” Kame caught Koki’s eye and held his gaze.

“Erm…I simply said that no one is as cute as you.”

Ignoring the playful gags of both Ueda and Maru, Kame raised an eyebrow and teased, “Oh? So you think I’m cute?” He kissed Koki on the forehead.

“Umm hmmm…” Koki breathed in his lover’s scent.

“Am I cute when I do this?” Kame moved his hands from Koki’s head to the back of his neck.

“No, not really, but…” Koki kissed the tempting lips before him, making Kame purr and melt into him. Koki unlatched himself and smiled, “you’re cute when you do that….”

“OH GET A ROOM ALREADY!” Maru interrupted and mock covered his eyes. Ueda shook his head with a cheeky glint in his eye.

“As if you guys haven’t seen any of this before.” Without waiting for a response, Kame took Koki’s hand and pulled him out onto set.

The minute Kame and Koki stepped out, Jin and Junno appeared from the back door, having arrived together after excusing themselves from the set of Yukan Club.

“What did we miss?” Taguchi sat enthusiastically on the make-up chair and flicked his silken golden locks. Jin rolled his eyes and sat himself down as well. Jin could never understand how Taguchi was able to muster up so much energy even after a whole night and morning of filming. All Jin hoped was for the thick foundation to cover up his dark eye bags.

“Oh nothing, Kame and Koki were just fooling around. Something about Koki being jealous of Horikita Maki. ” Maru said matter-of-factly before walking out.

And just like that, Jin’s eye bags grew heavier as his head throbbed ever so slightly.

***

Today’s recording was arguably the strangest one to date. Kame was still being too cordial towards Jin after the fainting incident a month ago, and yet seemed to be in a flirty, silly mood. Jin did not know if it was Horikita Maki’s presence that was causing Kame’s flighty behaviour, but he felt a tad sheepishly awkward about it.

While Kame chatted animatedly to their studio guest, Jin kept shooting glances at Koki, who seemed to be interjecting into the conversation at odd junctures, with the pretense of capturing the girl’s attention, but in actual fact, trying to get Kame’s away from her. And Jin, observing the entire farce, felt more than a little uncomfortable. He was feeling peculiarly jealous, but he was not sure if he was jealous of Kame paying too much attention to Horikita-san, or that his jealousy stemmed from Koki being jealous, in the way he could not be jealous when it comes to Kame. That feeling, coupled with the ever present prickle whenever Koki and Kame showed any form of affection at work, or in private even, made Jin a little disoriented and out of character.

Kame on the other hand, was almost oblivious to the fuss. He was honestly happy to see Horikita Maki again. He had liked her the moment they stepped on the Nobuta set together 2 years ago, and saw her as a younger sister. However, in the industry they were in, it was near impossible to foster friendly relationships with fellow peers, for fear of the paparazzi and the media misconstruing every meet up for something else. Horikita-san was a young girl, and should not be subject to the dirty side of the industry, one that he was all too familiar. It was only through occasions like this that he could interact without fear of scrutiny, and on this rare occasion, he was genuine in his interest in their studio guest.

The only thing that nagged him was the annoying way that Koki was trying to distract him from speaking to his friend. There really was no reason for Koki to be jealous, not because of Horikita Maki anyway. Besides, she was obviously enamoured with Maru, of all people. But, Kame knew Koki needed reassurance, and so he humoured him. The thing that Kame could not really fathom was Jin’s behaviour. It seemed as though a light, careless attitude had floated onto Jin as well. Jin’s mood was a little infectious, and when Jin teased him for answering too much on Horikita-san’s behalf, it felt so much like old times that Kame could not bring himself to be angry.

***

The familiar waft caused Jin’s stomach to do a flip-flop, not just because he was hungry. In the irony that is called life, particularly Jin’s life, he was co-judge with Koki for the silly little cooking competition that producers conjured up, possibly for the specific pleasure of torturing him. And, as icing on the proverbial cake, Kame was cooking fried rice.

They were in the midst of recording and Jin knew that he could not just skulk away in a corner. He had to participate, say clever things, or in his case, stupid things. It was fortunate that the rest of the members where in a heightened mood that Jin could bounce off. He did not know how he would manage otherwise. It did not help that Koki was behaving all domesticated with Kame, helping him out so naturally in the kitchen. All Jin could do was linger in the background, not really knowing what to do with himself.

Although he liked to cook, Kame’s repertoire of dishes was not all that comprehensive. He had his staple, safe recipes, and the moment he opened the fridge, and given the time constraint, fried rice was the only thing he felt he could deliver confidently. But, fried rice was special, he hardly made it, and even if he did, he would only cook it for himself. He could never bring himself to cook it for Koki. Therefore, even after he made up his mind, he hesitated, thinking how he could modify things so that it would not be exactly the same. His indecisiveness frustrated his designated kitchen assistant Ueda, who had no qualms displaying his puzzlement in front of the recording camera.

As he cooked against the clock, Kame could not help but throw glances at Jin. He wondered if Jin had even the slight inkling of the significance of this dish. In a weird way, Kame was feeling a little excited about cooking fried rice again, for Jin to taste his cooking again, but his excitement was marred by the guilt he felt when he saw Koki earnestly helping him, doing things for him without him asking.

Kame’s contradicting feelings were magnified during the tasting. He watched as Jin and Koki tasted what he cooked, how they ate with so much gusto. They both said that it was delicious, and Kame was glad, but then, was he happy that Koki, his boyfriend, liked it, or was he happy because Jin was eating what he had cooked?

For Jin, Horikita Maki’s squid and tofu combination was tasty in a fluffy, girly way, but Kame’s fried rice was beyond delicious. It infused Jin with warmth and tenderness, a dish Jin would not mind eating for the rest of his life. He heard Koki giving constructive criticism beside him and he was a little surprised, both by the fact that Koki seemed to not have tried the dish before, and also how Koki could find fault in it when Jin thought it was perfect.

Still in a state of confusion, Kame did not realise that he had picked up Jin’s used chopsticks to sample Horikita-san’s cooking. It was only when Koki jokingly pointed out the “indirect kiss” that he snapped out of his daze to feel the beginnings of a blush. He rolled his eyes at his boyfriend but could not control a small flutter in the pits of his stomach. Ever the professional, he could not make too big a fuss of his mistake, so he shrugged nonchalantly and stuffed a squid ring into his mouth. He made a big show of how delicious Horikita-san’s dish was, mostly for the benefit of the cameras, but also to assuage his confounding feelings.

Jin did not even notice Kame reaching for his pair of chopsticks until he heard Koki’s joking tone. He held his breath to see how Kame would react. He did not know what he was expecting, but he was disappointed nonetheless by Kame’s lack of a human reaction. Suddenly, he felt resentful and tried to think of something witty to say, and failed miserably. He wondered to himself why his heart still kept its hopes up when his mind clearly told him that it was better to just give up.

***

“I’m sorry we couldn’t let you win, Kame-chan.”

“What are you talking about?”

Koki and Kame were getting ready to turn in for the night after the long day of recording. All Kame wanted to do was put this day behind him. He was both physically tired and emotionally exhausted. He walked out of the bathroom after brushing his teeth and joined Koki on the bed.

“The cooking contest.”

Kame snuggled up next to Koki, allowing Koki to wrap his arms around him. Kame closed his eyes.

“Koki, honey, I’ve been in the industry as long as you have. I know how it works. We always let the guest win.”

“I know. But I could see you tried so hard, and it was really delicious. Especially the hot pepper. It was different, a nice touch.”

Kame kissed Koki on the cheek.

“Thank you.”

Koki returned the kiss gently and relaxed into the pillows.

“Even Jin thought you should win.”

Kame’s eyes shot open.

“Jin?”

“Yeah, he told me so when we went off to pretend to discuss the winner.”

Kame kept silent as he stroked Koki’s arm.

“Kame?”

“Yes, Koki?”

“I’m glad you and Jin are friends, really. It’s good to know that there’s someone else other than I watching out for you.” Koki yawned.

“Shhh…it’s late. Let’s sleep.”

Kame lay still as he listened to Koki’s steady breathing. He tried to shut out his thoughts but it was only when the first sun rays streamed through the window that he finally succumbed to slumber.

-----------------------------------------
NOTE: Wow! I went in circles with this one. I knew I wanted to include that episode of CTKT in this fic, but I kinda went round and round. Didn't turn out as well as I had thought it would, but I wrote too much already to abandon the chapter. So I just ran with it. Hope it's ok *crosses fingers*

[Fan Fic] Supernova - Chapter 1

Fri, 27 Feb 2009 04:46:53 GMT

Title: SUPERNOVA
Author: blinkbling24
Genre: AU, Angst (a little I think), Sci-Fi (a bit of a cross between X-men and Heroes), Smut (maybe)
Rating: R to NC-17 (to be safe)
Summary: Akanishi Jin has always been the blue-eyed boy of the Academy. What happens when one day Kamenashi Kazuya joins the folds? What role do they play in each other's lives, and can they use what is given to them to save what they hold dear?
Author's Notes: I am actually a little too busy to embark on another multi-chapter, since my other multi-chapter fic is still incomplete, but the theme of this contest was too good to resist. I'm not sure if I can complete this by the deadline, but I'll try my darnest. If not, I'll pull out and turn this into a non-contest multi-chapter. Hope you guys like it!
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Chapter One

He hovered in front of the rain-stained window. He was peering into a certain 8^th floor apartment unit of a decrepit apartment block in a seedy part of town. The sight before him made him smile and tear at the same time. He observed a little boy of about 8 years old, standing on a stool at the kitchen counter, reaching for a carton of cereal. He watched as the little boy poured the cereal carefully into a bowl, and then poured milk over the flakes. The boy waited for the milk to soak fully into the cereal, making it all mushy before bringing it into a sparse living cum bedroom.

In that room was a tattered old mattress, and on it, laid a woman – his mother. She was dying. But the little boy did not know that. She sat up and the boy fed his mother the cereal. She tried her best to swallow but could only manage a few mouthfuls. The boy placed the bowl down and wiped his mother’s mouth with a dirty handkerchief. She smiled weakly and pulled him gently into a hug.

“Jin-chan is special, the best son any mother could ever have. I’m so proud of you, son. I love you. Remember, mummy will always love you.”

It was those words that comforted the little boy, those words that has been his source of comfort after she was gone. He did not wish to linger any longer, and just as he was about to disappear, his eyes met, for the first time in his frequent visits, with a pair of molten caramel ones, from a boy that seemed younger than his 8-year-old self sitting on the fire escape mere metres from where he was hovering. It was as though this boy could see him. Impossible, because nobody ever could.

***
Every morning, at 6.30am, an alarm sounding like a mechanical songbird gone wrong would reverberate through the walls. Every morning, like clockwork. Everything in the Academy ran on clockwork. There was a time to sleep, a time to eat, a time to study, a time to train. But first, it was time to get up.

Akanishi Jin opened his sleepy eyes just as his room lighted up automatically. He was greeted by a floating stainless steel orb, which he named Woody, for irony’s sake.

“Good morning, master Jin. Breakfast will be served in the mass hall at 7.00am.”

“Don’t you have anything new to say in the mornings Woody? ‘It’s sleep-in day today’ would be nice.” Jin yawned and sat up, scratching the back of his head.

“It’s not in my programming, master Jin.”

“See? Same answer. I need to see Taguchi about you.”

Jin got out of bed and walked past the bobbing orb into his pristine, adjourning bathroom. He brushed his teeth with the silver toothbrush that had been laid out for him, and stepped into the shower, where the water was specifically warmed to 32 degrees Celsius, just the way Jin liked it.

“Window, Woody,” Jin said as he pulled on his uniform – a one-piece that molded perfectly to his body made from the softest clima-lite material that was able to withstand extreme assaults from the elements. Woody obeyed and projected a real-time image of the field outside onto the bare wall. It was going to be a nice day. Perfect for training, Jin thought.

“5 minutes to 7.00am, master Jin.”

“Ok, let’s go. Oh, have you downloaded my lesson materials for today?”

“Yes, master Jin, as always.”

“I don’t know why I bother asking….” Jin muttered under his breath as he punched the code to open his room door.

The minute Jin stepped out of his room, he was joined, with a gust of wind, by Yamashita Tomohisa, or Pi, as Jin liked to call him.

“Pi, there is really no need to be so fast so early in the morning. I just styled my hair dammit.”

“I was dragging my feet. I’m hardly awake yet.” Pi grinned at his friend.

“Yeah, whatever. Let’s move it. It’s pancakes for breakfast today.”

***
The Academy has been Jin’s home for almost 20 years. Unlike most of the other cadets who got to see their families once a month if they wished, Jin had nobody but himself. He did not remember a father, but memories of his mother still surfaced from time to time. She had died when he was 8 years old. If it were not for the Professor, he would have been left to the dogs, to be hunted down and destroyed.

You see, Jin was special, and I do not mean special in terms of high IQ and academic brilliance. Jin had powers. Superhuman powers. At the age of 2, Jin was able to move objects without touching them. At the age of 4, Jin could time travel, but only for a few seconds at a time, and only to the past. And, at the age of 7, Jin could lift himself off the ground and suspend in mid-air.

After his mother’s death, the Professor had brought Jin to the Academy, a place that the Professor had founded to train and develop children like Jin, children with superhuman powers, or gifts as the Professor liked to call them.

When Jin was little, the world could not accept such an evolution of humankind, this development of powers. The Professor used to tell him that people are jealous creatures, wanting things that they cannot have, and if they could not get what they wanted, they would go all out to destroy what they coveted in the first place.

As Jin grew older, he noticed that the Professor had allies in high places, and slowly, people with gifts were being accepted and were allowed to exhibit their powers within reason, as long as it did not harm anyone. There were still the purists though, who believed that this evolution was an evil mutation of the human genome, but they have been increasingly harder to find now.

Through the Academy’s training, the now 25-year-old Akanishi Jin’s powers have magnified. Previously, he could only move little things like spoons and empty plastic bottles. Now, he could move and lift objects bigger and heavier than himself and in any direction he wanted. Previously, he could only suspend in mid-air for a few minutes before dropping down onto the ground again. Now, he could fly, faster and further than a jet airplane.

However, his ability to time travel did not seem to improve in tandem. He could travel further down the timeline now, but it would still always be in the past. And he could only travel within his past, which meant that he could only see his own life unfold before him, nothing before, and nothing beyond. He could not change the past, if he was there, he was only a silent spectator, like a ghost. He was unable talk to anyone, or touch anything.

Jin always thought that time travelling was his weakest ability, and did not like to use it much. He liked training up the other two abilities, but not this one, and whenever the Professor got on his case about it, he would say, “What’s the point? It’s not I can change anything.” But, on occasions, when he was feeling down, or had a particularly hard day training, there was a place in time he would go back to, and sought comfort there.

***
Flight training was always fun. According to the Professor, the ability to fly is one of the common strains of the genome evolution. This meant that, as Jin had summarized in his non-scientific mind, save a few odd ones, those who have other superpowers would have the flight ability too. Hence, flight training sessions were packed with cadets. The more senior ones like Jin and his friends took the upper stratosphere, playing ridiculous games such as who can go higher into space without suffocating due to the lack of oxygen, or who can fly the fastest without getting burn marks in their uniforms. Actually, they were supposed to practice their high-speed dodge-and-avoid techniques, which goody-two-shoes Nakamaru pointed out.

“Ah, shut up Maru, you’re such a party pooper…..” Koki complained, but then began to fall into position, only because he saw a group of senpais darting towards them.

“Takki-kun, you guys off for another mission?” Jin asked enviously. When the Professor felt that his senior cadets were ready, he would assign them various missions to help perform tasks that ordinary humans could not do in an emergency situation. It helped with public sentiment, but more importantly, it gave the cadets a sense of purpose.

“Yes,” Takki said with authority, “bomb threat in the next city. We’re going to help with the evacuation. Now get out of the way, you clowns.”

Jin and his friends watched their senpais fly off into the horizon and each emitted a wistful sigh, picturing how great it would be to be able to exhibit their powers, to be heroes. Jin had been with the Academy for much longer than any of his friends, but the Professor had always kept him in the shadows. At first, when Jin would harass the Professor about it, the Professor would tell him that he was still young, and to wait a few more years. When even Matsumoto Jun was allowed out on a mission a couple of years ago, Jin knew that the Professor could not use the “you’re too young” excuse any more. And true enough, the Professor changed his tune, but not to the tune that Jin wanted to hear.

“Be patient. Your time will come Jin. Just not yet.”

When, Jin wondered, when would his time come?

“Soon, Jin,” he heard a soft voice in his ear and turned to face the prettiest girl in the Academy who was smiling at him sweetly.

“I wish you wouldn’t do that, Haru,” Jin cupped the girl’s face in his hands and stroked her cheeks with his thumbs.

Haru arrived at the Academy when Jin was about 16 years old. She was 14 years old then. She was one of the lucky few whom her parents recognized that her powers were a gift, and had sent her to the Academy to hone her ability. Haru’s dominate power was the ability to feel what the other party felt. She could feel their joy, their anger, their sorrow. It used to cripple her, when she did not know how to deal and compartmentalize the myriad of feelings she felt at one time. She had since learnt to use her power effectively, discerning what she felt from others and using them to her advantage if she needed to.

When Jin laid eyes on her, he thought that she was the most beautiful creature he had ever seen. Furthermore, she was warm and kind, and that drew Jin to her even more. They became fast friends, and it was inevitable that everyone thought they were a couple, the golden boy and girl in the Academy. But their relationship was a little lacking. They had shared kisses, and several very intimate moments, but somehow, there was something missing. Jin could not figure out what it was. Haru was perfect, but he just could not bring himself to give her his whole heart. Haru, bless her, felt that in him, but she never pressed, she never asked. She accepted Jin as is.

“Will you 2 lovebirds get a room? Some of us are trying to train here,” Pi jested as he flew between them, breaking them up.

Jin chuckled as he caught Pi and knuckled him in the head. The horseplay would have become much rougher if not for a junior cadet who had mustered up the courage to disturb his senpais in the upper stratosphere.

“What do you want, kid?” Koki asked gruffly.

A little scared, the young cadet eyed Jin, “A..Akanishi-san, the Pr..profess..ssor would like you to meet him on ground.”

Throwing the young cadet a kindly smile, Jin glanced down through a parting in the clouds. He squinted as he saw an ant-like figure that was the Professor walking across the field accompanied by someone else. Someone he did not recognize. He swooped down and landed gracefully by the Professor’s side.

“Ah, Jin. There’s someone I would like you to meet. Akanishi Jin, this is Kamenashi Kazuya, our newest cadet.”

Jin looked up and a familiar pair of molten caramel eyes stared back at him.

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 7

Thu, 12 Feb 2009 10:00:22 GMT

Title: Fragments

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame, Kokame

Genre: Angst, Romance, Smut

Rating: NC-17 (As there will be smut in subsequent chapters)

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: In life and love, you can’t have everything that you want, or can you?

Chapter 7

Sometime in January 2005, at the start of the Gokusen 2 fever

Tanaka Koki wondered if this sense of self torture was part and parcel of human nature, something that God had genetically implanted, making human beings unable to pull away from the masochistic pleasure of coveting one’s unobtainable object of desire. He watched, entrapped, as once again, Kame and Jin were singled out by the photographer to pose together.

Damn Gokusen. Damn Johnny.

At every photoshoot in the past month, the same scene played over and over like a broken record, Kame and Jin laughing, Kame and Jin sharing a private joke, Kame and Jin touching each other. And yet, Koki watched, eyes bone dry and head exploding from the persistent, silent screams.

But then, when Kame, in between poses, would catch Koki’s eye and smile, Koki would grin back. Koki would always have a smile ready for Kame. Koki lived for moments like these, ever since Kame first nudged his way into his heart.

“Koki-kun, c’mon! We’re going for drinks!”

"……”

“Are you really not going to talk to any of us outside of work?”

“…..maybe…”

“But we’re a team now. You’re ‘T’ in KAT-TUN and you’re stuck with us.”

“Whoopee doo….I’m literally dancing for joy….NOT.”

“Well, I’m sticking to you. I’ll make you like me, you’ll see!”

“…whatever….”

“You’re never going to win his heart by just standing here and watching, my friend.”

Koki turned and blinked at Nakamaru who had quietly taken position next to him getting ready for their turn to pair up.

“How can I compete with perfection?” Koki shrugged self-defeatedly, gesturing at the array of Johnny’s magazines strewn across the panel table as reading material to pass the time while waiting. Each publication had “Kamenashi Kazuya” and “Akanishi Jin” splashed ceremoniously across the cover, outshone only by the multitude of Akakame pages inside.

Nakamaru, in a rare moment of seriousness, threw a glance at the Gokusen pair, still hamming it up in front of the camera. He squinted a little, as if noticing something that others could not really see. He gave Koki a brotherly pat on the shoulder, “You’ll never know, Koki-kun, not everyone sees or even wants perfection.”

Yes, but, how often does the underdog win, thought Koki. Loving someone from afar was better than not loving at all.

***
Early August 2007, Filming for Cartoon KAT-TUN, Okinawa Special

Once again, Koki found himself watching, and feelings that never really went away came drifting back one painful stab at a time. He stood, behind the darkened window pane, a silent spectator and listener to the phantom actions and unspoken words that conveyed volumes of emotions unbeknownst to the players before him.

Koki watched as Kame and Jin stood side by side, each reminiscing the intangible past. He watched as the ice wall between Kame and Jin thawed a little, only to be frozen again. He watched as the electric current coursed through Kame when Jin rested his hand on Kame’s shoulder, only for Kame to labouredly ignore it.

And all Koki could think about was whether it was a fair victory on his part.

“How long have you been standing here watching them?”

Nakamaru had crept out to stand beside Koki in the dark, and despite his sullenness, he grinned slightly, remembering the horse-playing a couple of hours earlier.

“I feel like I’ve been watching them for years,” Koki’s smile disappeared.

Nakamaru sighed and rested his hand on Koki’s shoulder, mirroring the image on the balcony in front of them.

“Kame’s yours now. You just have to hold on to him, tightly.”

“But…..” Koki could not bring himself to say the words.

Nakamaru noticed something from the balcony, and just as he decided to turn away, he gave Koki one more reassuring pat on the shoulder before saying, “I know, my friend, I know…..and, tell Kame I’ll be sleeping in Ueda’s room tonight.”

***

“Koki?”

Koki had just crawled back under the covers after his brief conversation with Nakamaru when he heard the room door open gently. He opened his tired eyes and saw the love of his life standing by the doorway, gently shimmering with a glow that only Kamenashi Kazuya had.

“Mmmmm?” Koki did not want to let on that he was watching Kame and Jin mere minutes ago.

Kame closed the door behind him as he approached Koki’s bedside

“What is wimpy Nakamaru doing in my bed in the other room?"

The mock annoyance in Kame’s voice caused Koki’s spirits to lift a little.

“I don’t know. I presumed he went to the bathroom, but he never came back. Maybe he got lost.”

“Well, whatever it is, I’m a little bummed,” Kame sat himself down at the edge of the bed.

“Eh?” Koki, curiosity getting the better of him, sat up.

“I had wanted to chase him out of this room myself so that my boyfriend can make love to me. By taking the initiative, he took part of my fun away,” Kame pouted.

Koki could not resist. He leaned in and brushed his lips gently on Kame’s pouty ones, and smiled when Kame nuzzled his face into his neck.

“So, you want me to make love to you huh?”

“Yes please.” And Koki did as he was told.

***
Akanishi Jin closed the balcony door quietly and crept across the living area to the room he shared with Taguchi. As he went past a certain bedroom, he heard noises, noises that should not matter, not anymore. And yet, it did.

***
2^nd week of September 2007, along the hallways of Johnny’s Entertainment

Johnny sure does not give a guy a break, Jin thought to himself as he walked along the stark empty corridors of the JE building that late evening. Ever since he got back from LA, it has been one work thing after another, packing up his days, leaving him hardly any time for himself. Not that he minded. Thoughts of work covered up other thoughts, painful thoughts that threatened to surface whenever he saw his 2 bandmates together.

Speak of the devil.

But then, Kame could never be the devil, not with his effervescent aura that was nostalgically warm and yet, bitter cold at the same time.

Jin nodded in acknowledgement as Kame smiled politely, closing the gap between them.

“Your turn to see Johnny eh?” Jin tried to make cordial conversation.

“Yeah, new drama. Gonna sign the contract. You?”

“Yukan Club. Collecting my script…”

“Ah, that’s right, with Taguchi. Blonde hair really doesn’t…….”

A sudden wave of dizziness caused Kame to stop mid-sentence as he brought his arm out to steady himself against the wall. He blinked a few times, trying to clear away the black spots that marred his vision.

“Kame? KAME! Are you alright?” Jin reached out, and then curled his fingers and brought his arm down again.

“I’m f..fine….just….”

“KAZUYA!” Forgetting himself, Jin rushed forward and grabbed hold of Kame before the younger man could collapse onto the ground. Jin’s body cushioned Kame, with Jin bearing the brunt of the fall. His elbow throbbed as he landed awkwardly, but Jin did not care. His singular focus was the person in his arms, who was at the moment scaring him by being pale and disoriented.

“Kazu....can you hear me? Kazuya…” Jin tapped Kame’s cheek lightly trying to get a response. Relieved to hear a small groan from Kame, Jin scooped Kame up and carried him into an empty waiting room where he placed him gently on a plush couch.

Kame struggled to focus. He heard a voice calling him, but it sounded so distant. It was as if his name, Kazuya, was so sacred that it could not be said out loud. But even in its wispy quality, it was spoken with an emotion which Kame felt, even in his hazy state, he had to respond to. He blinked and blinked, until the haze lifted and he recognized the ceiling above him, the ceiling with whitewashed beams to which he often opened his eyes to whenever he took power naps between rehearsals. He tried sitting up, but his head was heavy and every muscle in his body hurt.

“Don’t try to sit up too quickly. Come, let me help you.”

Jin. Why must it be Jin? Kame let himself be helped up, hating being weak in front of Jin. He had been having frequent fainting spells of late and cursed silently at the timing of this particular one, even though he knew what caused it – his grueling non-stop Dreamboys schedule.

“Here, drink.”

He took a sip of whatever beverage that Jin offered to him, and winced as the liquid trickled down his throat and churned his empty stomach. He refused the offer of another sip, shaking his head.

“You haven’t been eating again.” Jin said it as a statement, not a question.

Kame shrugged. “Haven’t been sleeping much either, but not to worry. I just need to sit down for 5 minutes, and I’m good to go again. I’m used to it.”

“How can you say you’re used to it? It’s not something to get used to, Kazuya!” Jin felt an irrational anger rising from within him. He did not know if it was anger towards Kame who would not look after himself, or towards his own self, who could not take care of Kame.

Slightly taken aback that Jin had used his first name, and the volume of which he said it, Kame began getting off the couch, “I had to get used to it. I had no choice.” He walked towards the door, but before he could reach it, he felt a strong hand grab his wrist. He turned and met Jin squarely in the eyes.

Kame’s look infuriated Jin even more. How could he be so nonchalant, so unaffected? This was not normal.

“What do you mean you had no choice?!” Jin tried hard to control his voice.

“I’m an idol. I have responsibilities, back-to-back jobs,” Kame said calmly.

“That’s NO EXCUSE! Koki should be looking out for you!”

“Don’t you DARE bring Koki into this, it’s my own doing,” Kame gritted his teeth.

“That’s right! It’s your own fault! What are you trying to do? Kill yourself?!”

“As I said, I had no choice.”

Kame’s voice was dangerously low, but Jin was oblivious.

“STOP SAYING THAT! No one told you to overwork yourself…..you could have said no to Johnny, you could have walked away, you could have…….”

“YOU LEFT, JIN! YOU LEFT KAT-TUN, YOU LEFT BROKEN PIECES, PIECES I HAD TO PICK UP! DO YOU EVEN KNOW THAT? DO YOU?!!”

You left me.

Hot tears threatened Kame’s caramel brown eyes, and Jin was silenced.

Trembling from the effort, Kame heaved a tired sigh, “It doesn’t matter anymore. What’s done is done. I’m trying to move forward, so please, get out of my way.”

Taking Kame literally, Jin let go of Kame’s wrist.

“Kame, I’m s..sorry…..”

“No, don’t be sorry. I didn’t mean to blame you. You did what you had to do. Now, Johnny is expecting me, and I do have a date with my boyfriend. This is, after all, our one free night from Dreamboys.”

“S..sure.”

They left the room together, and before they parted, Kame turned to Jin and managed a small smile, “I promise I’ll let Koki make me eat.”

As Kame walked down the long corridor, listening to the sound Jin’s footsteps thinning out in the opposite direction, he thought back to that fateful night in the playground a year ago, and wondered if he could ever forget, if he would have to put on an act in front of Jin his entire life.
---------

Note: Apologies. This took a long while. What can I say? Mundane life got in the way. I'm not too pleased with this chapter, but at least it's gotten me back on the saddle. Comments much appreciated! :)

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 6

Thu, 23 Oct 2008 09:44:25 GMT

Title: Fragments

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame, Kokame

Genre: Angst, Romance, Smut

Rating: NC-17 (As there will be smut in subsequent chapters)

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: In life and love, you can’t have everything that you want, or can you?

Chapter 6

June 17, 2007 Final Cartoon KAT-TUN II You concert at Tokyo Dome

It was never Kame’s intention to be unfriendly to Jin, it was just that he did not know how to act around Jin now, especially when Jin seemed to not want anything to do with him. Not that Jin was very obvious about it, they were still talking, but the strain was more pronounced than before. Previously, Kame could tell that Jin was trying to close the gap that had widened over the 6 months, but now, it was clear to him that Jin did not really care anymore.

Even now, in the changing room getting ready for the first act, Jin was flitting around, borrowing this and that out of the make-up kits of the other members, soliciting laughter and mock insults. Jin was also surprisingly chummy with Koki, sharing jokes and teasing others with their brand of sardonic humour. It was nice to see Jin and Koki get along so well, but whenever Kame walked up to them, Jin would inevitably find an excuse to move away, as was the case at that moment.

Koki raised a quizzical look and gestured to Kame to go talk to Jin. Kame mouthed that he was trying but it was Jin that was the problem.

***

They stood side by side in the darkness, listening to the chants from the audience. Kame wondered at which point in his abnormally long career for someone his age he lost the feeling of nervous exhilaration that usually accompanied a performance. Since when did the gloss and glamour fail to dazzle him? Maybe because he knew now that it was sacrifice and sheer back-breaking work that got him to where he was.

He glanced over to his left and observed the silhouette that was Jin. Jin had always been able to separate work and life so effortlessly, something that Kame could never do. Work and life was the same to him, and he would never let anything jeopardize the position he was in now. He had given too much for it to be taken away.

Kame braced himself when he heard the first loud chord of the song. He fixed the look of effortless coolness that personified an idol, and when he heard the familiar words, “LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, BOYS AND GIRLS, WE ARE THE K-A-T-T-U-N”, uttered by his lover, Kame let the spotlight bathe him in its brightness. It was indeed, as it has always been, showtime.

***

Bokura No Machi De. Jin hated the song. He dubbed it Kame and Koki’s song, and he detested the fact that he had to stand on that platform and pretend to sing it. The song was a hit in his absence. Kame and Koki were a hit in his absence. However, this was also the song that Kame was most passionate about, he could tell from the way Kame coached him on the lyrics. Did this song really mean so much to Kame

Jin positioned himself, back facing Kame on the precarious platform. He heard the dramatic beginning of the song, and waited for Kame’s lilting voice to fill the air. Jin had always been the better singer, but he acknowledged that there was a magical quality in Kame’s singing that could teleport anyone who listened to a place beyond reality. It was a voice that could amplify the emotions. When Kame sang, he could carry a happy person to a land of sunshine and rainbows, and conversely, plunge the sad and hurt into insatiable darkness.

And now, as Kame’s voice stood out in Jin’s ears more so than the other members’, he felt his heart getting heavier as a certain yearning grew in him. Jin shut his eyes as he forced himself to sing the chorus, knowing that his aviators shielded the action from the cameras, and he thanked the heavens that this was the last time he would be part of this song.

But wait, he could not hear Kame anymore. In a fleeting second, Jin realized that Kame was in trouble, and subconsciously, he felt his voice rise to fill the void, habitually remembering everything about Kame, even his parts to the songs. Jin’s voice could barely be heard as the volume of his microphone was not that of the lead, but he knew he was doing something. He felt like he had not done something for Kame in a long time.

***

Kame paused in the midst of buttoning his crisp white shirt of his next costume as he focused his eyes on the monitor hanging down from the ceiling of the changing room. He watched as Koki went through the choreography of his solo. He watched as Koki lifted his white wifebeater, showing off the ab lines on his thin frame void of any body fat, ab lines that Kame was so familiar with, ab lines that Kame had traced countless times with his tongue as a prelude to making love.

He had to focus on Koki, particularly now, because just half an hour before, he had felt himself momentarily losing grip. It was not that Kame panicked when his microphone failed on him, technical glitches had happened before and would happen again. It was Jin that threw him off equilibrium. How dare he? How dare he swoop in where he was not needed? Kame had things well under control, and Jin, by doing what he did, made Kame seem weak, something that he had been trying to bury ever since……..He did not need Jin in any way, not anymore.

“You’re going to tear the shirt with that grip. Is Koki so sexy that you feel you have to jump him right this instant?”

Kame tensed further at the voice and lowered his gaze to meet with a smirking Jin beside him.

Equally sarcastic, Kame replied, “Oh? You’re talking to me now?”

Jin shrugged, “I never meant not to talk to you. There was just nothing to say.”

Kame bristled but kept it in check. He knew that there was more than half of the concert to go, and if he started this with Jin, Jin would be in no condition to finish the show to perfection. He could not afford that, KAT-TUN could not afford that. He would not allow Jin to put KAT-TUN in jeopardy again. So, he mustered up a smile and said, “Thank you Jin,” and walked away to greet the sweaty Koki who had just finished his solo with a hug.

***

Early August 2007, Filming for Cartoon KAT-TUN, Okinawa Special

Okinawa had an effect on him. It was a special place, and coming to Okinawa, be it for work or for leisure, always made Jin feel at peace. Standing at the balcony of Tokoro George’s guest house, with a cigarette between his fingers, Jin relished the coolness of the night rain. He admired the strange beauty of the red night sky marred with pregnant clouds, and the pitter-patter of the raindrops was oddly comforting.

The other members had all gone to bed after a laughter-filled ghost storytelling session, mostly at wimpy Maru’s expense. But he could not sleep, there were too many things on his mind, triggered by being in Okinawa once again. Jin’s thoughts drifted slowly in all directions as he breathed in the rain-scented air, from the fun that he had today with KAT-TUN, to thoughts about how the members where warming up to him once again, to how it was much easier these days to observe Kame and Koki’s interactions. Maybe he was finally admitting to himself that Kame was never his, it was just something that he had made up. But then, his thoughts landed on an image of a lonely green tent on a quiet beach in Okinawa, and he did not know what to think.

“Since when did you become more melancholy than I?”

Jin acknowledged his stealth companion by stubbing out his cigarette into his portable ashtray. He pursed his lips slightly even as he kept his eyes fixed at a distant nothing-in-particular through the rain.

Kame walked up to Jin and stood beside him, and for a couple of seconds, tried to figure out what Jin was looking at. He realized that the image that Jin was focused on was an image in his mind, and Kame wondered if it was the same image he had.

Jin broke the silence, “Can’t sleep?”

“Sleep has never come easily for me, you know that.” Kame wondered where his tender voice came from, but maybe it was because they were in Okinawa, and Okinawa was special.

How much they had changed since their very first trip. Kame remembered the breezy innocence of yesteryear, but it was gone now. Kept safe in that little green tent that was so out of reach. In its place was a dark cynical dome that trapped and poisoned them, causing them to doubt everything and everyone. Kame wondered if there was an antidote, but then again, would he take it, even if he had it.

“I thought love would have changed you. Isn’t it easier to sleep in the arms of the person you love?”

“Ah, but I’m sharing the room with Ueda. Besides, lovers need time apart sometimes, makes the heart grow fonder and all that shit.”

Jin chuckled, “Since when did you become such a romantic? If I had a lover, I would never let that person out of my arms, even for a second.”

Kame raised a perfectly shaped eyebrow, “Look who’s the one that’s a romantic?”

For the split second, they both looked at each other with the lost closeness of the past, and Jin saw a flicker of tenderness in Kame’s eyes before they became unreadable once again.

“Kame?”

“Yes, Jin?”

Jin scratched his head and pondered his next question, “Why is it that Koki’s able to get you to eat, when I never could?”

Did the ghost stories freak Jin out so much that he lost his senses?

“Where did that question come from?”

“Nowhere in particular. I just noticed that you would eat whenever Koki offered food to you, but you would always refuse to eat more than a mouthful when we go out to dinner…..or at least, when we went out…for…..” Jin let his sentence fade, noticing how childish he sounded. Maybe he was that 16 year old boy again, wondering why his 14 year old friend was being mean to him. If only things were that simple.

Kame, unaware of the full implications of Jin’s thoughts, uncharacteristically smacked Jin on the head, “Are you saying I’m fat?”

“OW!” But it did not stop Jin from laughing out loud, something he had not done in a long while.

Kame grinned, his memory effortlessly resting on days long gone. He remembered the sound of the waves through the tent interlaced with the heavy sleep breathing of his friend Jin who was next to him. He remembered how he had thought then that their friendship was special, and nothing would come between them. Look how things had turned out.

Jin watched Kame face change from the recognizable child-like glow, to one marred with confusion, to finally settle on a resigned expression.

“Jin?"

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

Kame wanted to say he was sorry for pretending, to say sorry for letting someone else love him, to say sorry for trying his best to love someone else back. But then, Jin did not know all of that. Jin did not care. However, it was something Kame needed to do to feel better, and so he said, “I’m sorry for nothing, and for everything….”

“Kame….I….” I came back because of you. I came back so that I could love you. But Jin could not say those words. Not when Kame loved someone else. Instead, Jin reached out and placed his hand on Kame’s shoulder.

Kame stiffened, but did not pull away.

Just like that, the 2 friends stood side by side in silence for a while, soaking in the Okinawa magic. It did not come as a surprise to Jin that Kame was the first to break the spell. The younger man turned, and without a word, went back into guest house, back to being the K in KAT-TUN, back into Koki’s arms, and Jin wondered if he could ever feel the magic again.
------------------------------------------------------
Note: Goodness! It took me a while to pull this chapter out of my ass. I suppose the main point of this chapter is to show how going back to a place that means something let them become their true selves with each other, even for a split second.

Right, I promise to move faster in the next chapter. Need inspiration. *Off to watch old eps of Cartoon KAT-TUN....hee!

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 5

Fri, 19 Sep 2008 07:41:12 GMT

Title: Fragments

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame, Kokame

Genre: Angst, Romance, Smut

Rating: NC-17 (As there will be smut in subsequent chapters)

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: In life and love, you can’t have everything that you want, or can you?

Chapter 5

October 14, 2006

The sky was laden with grey clouds, Kame noticed when he opened his eyes and looked through the crack in the window curtains. He turned his head and saw that his bedside clock read 8.17am. Jin was already on his flight, on the way to somewhere that was out of Kame’s grasp. He shivered as a slight draft entered the room and he reached for the blanket to cover his naked self. He turned his head inward to come face to face with a sleeping Koki.

Kame studied the face of the man next to him. Koki’s features were defined and chiseled, very unlike Jin’s soft profile. But Koki was anything but rough, despite the persona he tried to portray. Kame remembered every single second of what happened the night before, how Koki treated him with a tenderness that he never expected. The sex that ensued was not mind blowing, but it was warm and filled with love on Koki’s end. Even when Koki was on the brink of ecstasy, he had made sure that Kame was comfortable, by the way he propped up the pillows, or the gentle whispers of sweet nothings, words that Kame could not bring himself to reciprocate.

Leaning in, he gave Koki’s bristled cheek a soft kiss. Maybe what he needed right now was simplicity, and Koki could give him that.

Koki opened his eyes, and the moment he did so, Kame saw care and concern in them that immediately made him feel guilty.

“Kame,” Koki croaked with sleep still in his voice. “I’m sorry.”

“Silly,” Kame smiled. “What’s there to be sorry about?”

“I..I couldn’t control myself last night….I’ve loved you a long time Kame…but I don’t want to take advantage of you, it wasn’t my intention. I’m sorry.” Koki buried his face into the pillows.

“I wanted you Koki, don’t you remember?” Kame placed a hand on Koki’s cheek.

“But you were hurting Kame…..Jin left….”

Ah. So Kame was not as discreet about his partiality towards Jin after all.

“Ssshhh….I want you,” Kame repeated.

“But…Jin….”

“Forget about Jin. He’s not here, but you are,” He gave Koki a deep kiss and he felt Koki respond hesitantly. Kame broke the kiss gently and looked into Koki’s eyes, “Will you have me Koki? Someone that is slightly broken, but is willing to be made whole again?”

Kame felt that he was cornering Koki, that he was the one taking advantage of Koki’s weakness. Yes, he was selfish, but at a time like this, when the love of his life did not care, he needed to take care of himself.

“Trust me, Koki.”

“I love you Kame.”

When Kame heard those words, all he could do was to kiss Koki again and again, hoping to kiss away guilt he felt. He promised himself as he let Koki make love to him once more, that he would try to love Koki the way that Koki loved him. There was no room for regrets, he thought to himself, and he spread his legs to receive his lover.

***

Early May 2007

After the Cartoon KAT-TUN recording, Jin made a swift escape to the nearest pub. He inhaled the familiar smell of stale alcohol as he plonked himself into a quiet booth in the corner. He marveled at himself for having stood so steadily during the recording session earlier, considering that he was slightly buzzed from gulping down a couple of shots of vodka before leaving his apartment. He could not remember exactly how he made his way from his apartment to the set that morning, except for the fact that there was no way he could face Kame and Koki sober, no matter how good his acting was.

“Jesus Christ! You’re dead stinking drunk! What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Yamapi, dear friend, you’re my…hic…only friend…now…”

“You called me over to your place so late at night just to tell me that? Shit man, you could have told me over the phone.”

“Kame…hic… has Koki now…..”

“Oh.I see.”

“Did you…hic…know?”

“….”

“Answer me! Did you FUCKING know????”

“Jin, c’mon, you need to sleep it off…”

“Pi…it bloody hurts…..”

Yamapi cursed himself for arriving a little too late, to find his best friend slumped over the table with a half-empty bottle of tequila with an ashtray over-spilling with cigarette butts. “Jin…you’re going to corrode your liver at this rate. How long has it been since you were last sober?”

“Let it corrode away then, nobody bloody cares anyway, and sobriety is fucking overrated,” Jin said sluggishly as he pulled himself up to look at his friend. “You want a shot?” Jin offered.

“Sure, why not?” Yamapi accepted the offer, the more shots he drank, meant less tequila shots for Jin.

They sat and drank in companionable silence for a while until Jin broke it with a self-pitying chuckle.

“I’m so fucking dumb. They have been in my face ever since I got back, and I didn’t see it.”

“You saw what you wanted to see, Jin.”

“When, Pi? When did they….” Jin could not bring himself to say those words, but Yamapi understood.

“I don’t know for sure, it was just something I gradually noticed, to the point where I had to ask Ueda, and he confirmed it. I think it was slightly after you left.”

Jin nodded. It had to be. Kame would have told him if it was before…well, at least, the Kame then would have. Jin rubbed his face with his hands before pushing away the tequila bottle.

“Oh? We’re done?”

Jin shrugged.

“Why do I care so much, Pi? Kame’s my friend, so is Koki. I should be happy for them.”

“Because Jin, you have been in love with Kame ever since you were 14 years old.”

“What? No….”

“Stay in denial, why don’t you? Heartbreak, Jin, and it hurts like a bitch.”

“Fuck.” Jin reached for the bottle again. This second revelation warranted another drowning session.

***

“Kame?”

“Hmmm….?”

Kame was concentrating intently on trying to stay within the lines of the tiny nail bed as he diligently polished Koki’s last finger with black nail polish.

“You didn’t look at Jin at all today, during the recording….”

“Really? I didn’t realise….maybe there wasn’t a need to, he didn’t really say anything very interesting,” Kame said unaffectedly as he returned the nail polish brush to the bottle and blew gently on Koki’s hands.

“Ok, all done. Now it’s my turn,” Kame stretched out his hand to Koki.

Koki sighed in resignation. Even as he reached for the bottle and lovingly started polishing Kame’s nails, acceding to the younger man’s demands of wanting only the alternate ones coloured, Koki realized that he was far from understanding the man he had been sharing his life with for the past almost 7 months. Loving Kame from afar in the past had its torturing moments for sure, but at least Koki could reign his feelings in whenever he wanted to. Now, having fallen deeper and harder, Koki felt that he was perpetually drowning in the mystery that was Kamenashi Kazuya, and yet, Kame had a vice-like grip on Koki’s heart that was sweet yet excruciating at the same time.

The Tanaka Koki that was of reason and rationale, knew that there were facets of Kame that were flawed, broken, and not easily mended, but the Tanaka Koki that was madly in love looked past all that, masochistically focusing on how much love he can show Kame, and wanting so much for Kame to reciprocate just a little bit of that love.

“Kame….look at me please?” Koki, with sensibility sitting on his shoulder, urged his lover, but, he could not help melting a little when pools of liquid chocolate looked up at him. Koki straightened his shoulders and cleared his throat, “Jin.”

“What about Jin?”

“Kame, KAT-TUN can’t afford another setback, and Jin’s a friend…….”

“What are you trying to say, Koki?” Kame inched closer and rested his head on Koki’s shoulders.

Koki gulped, “You know what I mean, I don’t want to say it…..”

“Say what, Koki?” Kame started drawing light circles on Koki’s thighs with his newly painted finger.

With fear in his heart, Koki said, “Be nice to Jin…we..we..need him……but Kame….” Koki moaned as Kame’s hand travelled further up his thigh.

“Yes, Koki?” Kame mumbled as he pushed his lover down onto the sofa and nibbled his ear.

“Oh…Kame…be nice to Jin, but love only me?”

Kame could see the desperate insecurity in Koki’s eyes, and tears almost, but not quite, welled up. Kame’s tears were for one person only, and even though Koki came close, he was not the one. But Kame knew that on some level, he did love Koki, kind and sweet Koki. And so, Kame did the only thing he knew how when it came to Koki, which was to do his best to make love to Koki to reassure him that he was not going anywhere.
--------------------------------------------------
Note: Kame's character is getting more and more complex as I plod along with this story...hmmm.....we'll see how it goes as the story continues......

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 4

Tue, 09 Sep 2008 08:23:45 GMT

Title: Fragments

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame, Kokame

Genre: Angst, Romance, Smut

Rating: NC-17 (As there will be smut in subsequent chapters)

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: In life and love, you can’t have everything that you want, or can you?

Chapter 4

Early May 2007

There was something pressing on Jin’s heart, even when he was in LA. He went away to escape the budding feeling that he hoped to nip, but while he was away, going through experiences that were totally new to him, it dawned on him that no matter how far he ran, he could not shirk off something that was ready to bloom. When he was in LA, he would see new things, hear new sounds, and as time progressed, he began to wish that someone was there to experience all those sights and sounds with him, and that someone was Kame.

Jin found himself remembering more and more, the times he and Kame shared in the past, and he relished in those memories that would always leave a smile on his face. It was the memories that spurred him on during the hardest of days. Ever since he was 14, Kame was constantly by his side, and Jin had come to a revelation that he needed Kame to feel whole. He did not admit this to Johnny-san, but Kame was a key motivation, admittedly among other things, that called him back to Japan.

But, the Kame today was an enigma to Jin. His coldness in New York shocked him, his warmness in the initial days of his return was not as comforting as before. And now, as Jin tried to listen to the younger man that was sitting across of him, Kame’s maturity and professionalism made him seem unreachable.

***

“Kamenashi-kun?”

“Manager-san?”

“We need to get Akanishi-kun up to speed with all the songs as there are instructions from the top that he should join in the concert bit by bit, and eventually perform the full show by the Tokyo Dome concerts where recordings for the DVD will be done.”

“What’s that got to do with me?”

“You’re the one that knows the ins and outs of the choreography and songs best, so schedule some tutorial sessions for him.”

“Me?”

“Yes, you. And while you’re at it, brief him on Cartoon KAT-TUN. His return episode will be recorded in 4 days time.”

That was how Kame winded up seeing Jin everyday after the Sendai concert appearance. Kame patiently took Jin through all the songs and tried his best not to yell at him when he could not remember the lyrics of even Harukana Yakusoku. Kame walked Jin through the choreography, hissing inwardly at Jin’s inability to follow simple instructions well.

But Jin being Jin, with his natural charm, could get away with a lot of things. And when Jin smirked his signature smirk after yet another mistake, all Kame could do was to take a deep breath and plaster a smile on his face, just like what he always did all those years ago.

***

The day was going particularly well, Jin thought. Kame only rolled his eyes at him twice in the last 8 hours. It was a good sign. Jin had spent the past 2 hours, while Kame was rambling on about Cartoon KAT-TUN’s production format, trying to ascertain if the old Kame was still in there somewhere.

The more time Kame spent with Jin, the more he let his guard down. It almost seemed like they were teenagers again, but still, Kame kept up with the professionalism. He had worked too hard for too long to let everything go to pieces from a simple, charming smile.

Jin spied the familiar innocent glint in Kame’s eyes more than a couple of times, and Jin toyed with the thought of engaging Kame in a conversation that was not about work, something that they had not done since his return.

“Jin? Are you listening to me?”

“Yeah…kinda. Actually Kame, you don’t have to do this. I know the procedures like clockwork. I’ve been doing this a long time.”

“Yes, but Jin. Things change. The way things are done, KAT-TUN, you, and I, have changed.”

Kame’s voice came out strained as he looked down at the draft script in front of him.

“Have I changed that much?” Jin ventured to ask.

Kame clasped his hands together and brought his eyes up to meet Jin. “Yes, you have. But for the better. You’ve matured, Jin, and it shows.” Kame smiled.

“You’ve done a bit of growing up too, you know.”

“Well, I didn’t have a choice, did I?” Kame’s words were accompanied by a shot of bitterness in his eyes.

Jin winced. He was beginning to regret his move.

Kame collected himself. It was not worth having an argument with Jin about what was in the past.

“Sorry, Jin. It came out wrong. I’m glad you’re back, truly, I am.”

Jin nodded and searched for something in Kame’s eyes that conveyed that it was alright. He had to look hard, but he saw a little something, and that gave him the courage to say, “Kame, after this, can we go someplace. I have something I want you to know.”

Maybe it was time Jin knew. “Alright. My place. I have something to tell you too.”

***

There would never be a good time, Jin kept telling himself as he drove his own car closely behind Kame’s. It was now or never, Jin repeated over and over in his head. He did not know why he was so nervous. It was not as though he was going to make a grand declaration of love, he was not even sure that it was love. He just wanted to tell Kame his feelings, in hope that there were some of the same feelings on Kame’s end. Jin thought that maybe by speaking out, it would break the ice that seemed to have formed between them.

Kame’s knuckles turned white as he clenched his steering wheel a little too tightly. He knew that if he were to let Jin know what he was about to tell him, it would change things forever. There was no going back. Kame did not want to feel numb anymore, he was getting sick and tired of it.

There was silence as they traveled in the elevator, both trying to compose their words to each other, except that perhaps Kame had it a little easier. All he needed to do was to open the door.

“Come in, Jin.”

“Wow, you’ve redecorated. I didn’t know you were the sort to hang a disco ball from your living room ceiling,” Jin grinned at Kame, but Kame could not bring himself to grin back.

“Well, I didn’t redecorate by myself…..you want a drink?” Kame avoided Jin’s eyes as he moved to the kitchenette. Kame’s sensitivity to the sounds of his own home told him that the shower tap had just been turned off. He braced himself.

“Sure, you’ve got beer?” Jin settled himself on the sofa.

Kame nodded and buried his head in the refrigerator.

“Kame….” Jin began, when Kame finally walked over with 2 cans in his hands, “you know….in LA…..I had time to think….and….feelings…..”Jin stammered, suddenly incoherent.

Kame stopped in his tracks when he heard to word “feelings” leave Jin’s lips. What was Jin trying to say? He looked at Jin who was twitching nervously, and Kame began to think that it might not have been a good idea to have brought Jin home.

Jin searched Kame’s expression for encouragement, but all he saw was tension.

“Kame….I…..”

“JIN!”

Kame closed his eyes for a second, acknowledging the tipping of the scale. He then put the beer cans onto the coffee table and turned towards the person who was standing at the doorway of the bedroom with only his boxers on.

“Koki? What are you doing here?” Jin asked, and Kame’s stomach twisted a little at the look of confusion on Jin’s face.

“Koki lives here, Jin,” Kame said in a soft voice.

“Since when? Koki, what was wrong with your previous apartment?” Jin looked from one man to another, not understanding why they both looked so solemn.

Jin watched as Kame walked towards Koki. He watched as Koki gave Kame a soft, tender smile. He watched as Kame pecked Koki on the lips. But he did not want to believe it. It could not be real. It simply could not!

“I..I suddenly remembered, I’m meeting Yamapi for dd..d.drinks,” Jin stood up abruptly and walked towards the main door.

“Jin, wait. Stay a while. We’ll catch up!” Koki generously offered.

Jin turned and managed a weak smile at his friend, avoiding Kame’s eyes completely, “Thanks Koki, maybe another time.” He opened the door and walked out.

“We should have told him sooner, you know,” Koki said as he pulled Kame into a hug.

“Well, now he knows,” Kame melted into Koki’s embrace, but his eyes never left the closed door. As the image of Jin’s devastated expression burned itself into his mind, tears fell for the very first time.

***

The next morning, Kame and Koki turned up together for the recording of KAT-TUN Cartoon, their first one with Jin. Kame sat in the make-up chair, and gave a soft sigh when the make-up artist commented that his eyes were very puffy. He had cried himself to sleep, with Koki’s strong arms around him. But that was last night. It was a new day, and he was going to put it behind him, just like how he had put so many other things behind him.

Yet, throughout the recording, he was not in top form, responding dully to the comments of his fellow members and the 2 guests. And through it all, he did not once look at Akanishi Jin, who was putting on a more composed performance than he was.

Not that Akanishi Jin looked at Kamenashi Kazuya either, anyway. Maybe, finally, it was all over.
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Note: I foresee that I'll be majorly stuck for Chapter 5, but that's my problem...heh. Hope you enjoyed Chapter 4!

[Fan Fic] Fragments - Chapter 3

Tue, 09 Sep 2008 08:14:40 GMT

Title: Fragments

Author: blinkbling24

Pairing: Akame, Kokame

Genre: Angst, Romance, Smut

Rating: NC-17 (As there will be smut in subsequent chapters)

Disclaimer: I obviously don’t own them, because if I did, this fic would be in video instead of just words.

Warning: Fic is unbeta-ed, so please excuse the grammer/spelling mistakes, if any.

Summary: In life and love, you can’t have everything that you want, or can you?

Chapter 3

April 20, 2007 - day of the “Akanishi Jin Returns” press conference

“You’re certainly dressed for the occasion!” Kame was greeted by a jovial Taguchi as he entered, side by side with Koki, into the holding room of the hotel that they were having the press conference in.

“Huh?” Kame looked down at his outfit, puzzled for while, before realization hit him. “Fucking stylist put me in a fucking red jacket…..” Kame mumbled under his breath, even as he gave a shrug to Taguchi, “I’m just wearing what the stylist handed to me….”

“Seems like the PR team is working hard trying to assure the public that KAT-TUN is a-ok, with your jacket as an indication,” Ueda pondered wisely, familiar with the way the industry worked.

“Yeah, they’re milking AkaKame again,” Maru pointed out the obvious.

AkaKame? Kame had not heard that phrase for so long that it seemed almost foreign and it started up the whirlwind of memories that he thought had already faded into oblivion. Apparently not. He mustered up a smirk, “Well, whatever works I guess…..”

“Milking? I’m not a cow Nakamaru.”

Kame’s head snapped backwards to see Jin sauntering casually into the room even as friendly laughter erupted at the prodigal member’s words.

“Jin! Welcome back! How was your flight?’ Taguchi bounded up and hugged Jin by the shoulders.

“Was alright, as flights go.” His grin met with 5 other grins, albeit one that was slightly less wide than the rest.

As he watched everyone interact, Kame’s heart felt a little lighter. No doubt things had changed, and there was a little bit of reservation on Jin’s end as well as KAT-TUN’s, but he knew that it was just the initial awkwardness. KAT-TUN would be alright, they would be whole once more. It was going to work, and their careers, previously unstable, was solid again.

It was all he cared about with regards to Jin’s return, or at least that was what he was telling himself. After returning from New York in February, Kame had resolved to put the unintentional coldness behind him, and try to forge a new friendly working relationship with Akanishi Jin because, he had to admit, all 6 of them needed each other to survive in the industry, at least for the time being.

“Jin,” Kame began, extending a hand to the older man.

Jin raised a brow. Why was it Jin now instead of the Akanishi in New York?

“Yes, Kame?” shaking the hand offered to him and looking squarely at the younger man. His eyes were still unreadable, Jin observed.

“Let’s get out there and give the fans what they have been patiently waiting 6 months for.”

***

April 21, 2007 - day of Jin’s appearance at the Sendai concert, his official return to KAT-TUN

He had missed this, the adrenalin rush that rode on the cheers of the audience. And yet, as Jin waited in the wings for his bandmates to change out of their sweaty costumes into the cotton concert t-shirts, he felt a pang of fear. What if he had lost it? What if he was not good enough anymore? Everyone, especially Kame, seemed to have improved, moving and performing with a slickness that seemed so pristine and perfect. Would he be able to join back in seamlessly, and not be a dead weight for KAT-TUN?

As the cloud of doubts started to loom above him, it was waved away with one single voice.

“Penny for your thoughts.”

Kame was standing beside him, the first to be ready for the encore.

“Nothing….just thinking how much I miss……this.” He turned to Kame and said with a subtle double meaning.

Kame made no acknowledgement that he understood, but he did give a brilliant smile, “You’ll do fine Jin. You are Akanishi Jin, and nothing is impossible with you.”

There was something about the hint of genuine encouragement in Kame’s voice that Jin had not heard since, well, since that fateful day in the playground, and it made Jin feel invincible again.

“Ah, it’s good to see you two talking again, just like the good ol’ days,” Koki walked up, wedged himself between them and slung his arms around their shoulders.

“Koki! Stop!” Kame chuckled as Koki snuck his fingers into Kame’s armpit and started tickling. Jin laughed. He was glad that nothing had changed between Kame and Koki, that they were still good friends. He trusted that Koki had looked out for Kame when he was away.

The other 3 milled around, and they took their positions. The platform slowly rose to expose Jin to the audience, and with the roar of the crowd, and Kame beside him, holding his hand and smiling so brightly, Jin was confident that he had made the right decision, this was where he belonged.

***

In Kame’s hand was the gift that Jin had given him in New York – a photograph of the both of them taken years ago at a Christmas party at Jimmy Mackey’s home with a simple wooden border framing it. It was nothing extravagant but it spoke volumes, noise that Kame did not want to hear, but could not bring himself to ignore.

Jin was back. Kame let the reality sink in. It all seemed surreal on stage, with the bright lights and boundless energy. Jin standing beside him felt so right, it filled up the place that felt very empty to Kame for the past 6 months. But when the last of the audience trickled out, when the lights of the stadium dimmed, to Kame, the show was over, and it was back to the familiar slight numbness, even as he bade a friendly goodbye.

Kame traced Jin’s face in the photograph with his index finger, before getting up from the edge of the bed and walking to a chest of drawers. He buried the frame in the midst of a stack of t-shirts he seldom wore, and just as he closed the drawer shut…..

“Kame, supper’s ready!”

“Be right out!”

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Note: It's a bit slow moving, yes? My apologies. There's so many ideas I have with regards to their extremely complicated relationship, and I'm a bit unwilling to let go of those ideas. But, as a peace offering, I wrote 2 chapters, so please preceed to chapter 4 :)